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OSS is the Rudest SK EVER

SMBlues's picture

SO/DH is going out of town for business tomorrow. OSS's birthday is Thursday. DH isn't going to be here so he made the decision to have a mini celebration last night with the four of us. DH asked OSS what he wanted and got him all that he asked for. He also got a cake.

We had a repeat of Saturday where OSS walked in and didn't speak. I returned the favor by not saying Happy Birthday. It's not like my money paid for his gifts. OSS and YSS had pizza in honor of OSS's birthday. It was presents and cake time. That went over wonderfully....not really. OSS told DH he would open his gifts on Thursday. (side bar: DH did explain he would be out of town for business. he told him as soon as he found out) I know from a reliable source that BM will take pictures on OSS and YSS birthday with their gifts on their birthdays and post on Facebook. I think that kind of stung DH a little because he wanted to see OSS's reaction to the gifts. Also, he went through the trouble to make sure he had his gifts before going out of town.

We sang Happy Birthday and OSS looked like he didn't want to be bothered. At that point, I got me a glass of wine and left the room. I felt bad for DH. I stayed out of it. Not my kid, not my problem right?

Acratopotes's picture

yes you have it... not your kid and not your problem..... Hopefully your DH will wake up to this rude boy and have a stern talk to him about politeness and manners

Yes BM will post on FB and she will make sure people think she bought the gifts and make it look like DH got him nothing and is not even in town..

SMBlues's picture

I kind of thought so, but wasn't sure. I started to tell DH but decided to mind my business. It was up to DH to explain to OSS that he wanted to celebrate his birthday with him. He didn't. OSS is ungrateful anyway and definitely thinks he is entitled to everything.

hereiam's picture

The gifts were from your DH, he should have told his son to open them. Why was your husband allowing him to be so rude? When someone gives you a gift, you open it. That is part of the fun of giving gifts, to watch the person open the gift you gave them and see their excitement.

That was definitely done to slight your DH and very rude. "Oh, I'll just open these some other time, no big deal." He might as well have thrown them in the trash.

SMBlues's picture

DH does not think his children are rude. He thinks they have arrived and his job as a parent is done. DH should have thrown those gifts away. He should have said I'll hold on to them until I return from out of town.

hereiam's picture

I have a big mouth so I would for sure let DH know how rude his kid is.

Your husband doesn't feel like his son was being rude by not even speaking to you? He went to the trouble to celebrate the kid's birthday before going out of town, the kid won't even open the gifts he got him, and he doesn't think that's rude? Okay.

Aniki-Moderator's picture

I had a niece who tried that caca with her grandmother. Grandma said, "Fine. Then I'll just take them with me and you can open them the next time I see you." NOTHING would dissuade Grandma from taking those presents with her. Not even, "Okay, I'll open them now."

This is the same niece who displayed an unenthusiastic and ungrateful reaction to a Christmas gift from this Grandma. Grandma told niece to bring her the gift. Niece did and her grandma set it aside with her things.

Niece: What are you doing?
Grandma: Taking it back. You don't want it and you were rude.
Niece: I want it!
Grandma: You only want it because I took it back. Too bad. I'll give it to a child who is grateful to have ANY present.

Suffice to say, niece learned to be polite and thankful for ALL gifts after that. }:)

SMBlues's picture

Okay is right. I have told DH several times and I mean several, when OSS walks into this apartment he does not speak. He address it, but I'm guessing not firmly enough. My family did not play that. I tried that one day when I was younger and I never tried it again. It is just common courtesy to say hello.

Ispofacto's picture

DH is under order to not buy anything for SD because she doesn't appreciate anything.

Well, she conned him into buying her a new bed-in-a-bag set a couple weeks ago. You know, because she was bored, and she wanted something. Even tho her room has been redone 3x in the last 5 years.

I had him repo it. She's getting it for xmas. And that's about it. No more extravagant parties or gifts, no more vacays, no more outings, we don't even eat out anymore. Because she's an as$hole.

If SS were my kid, the gifts would be gone when he comes back. "Oh, I got the impression you didn't want them, so I gave them to someone who would appreciate them."

And next time, I would be too busy to attend his party.

notarelative's picture

Ah the bring the gifts home to open snub. Been there. Done that.
In our case it was the SD's kids who were under five at the time. As soon as the gifts came out SD and her husband would get the coats and take both the kids and the gifts home.

First time it happened we were stunned. Too stunned to say anything.
H was upset, but he won't say anything.
So after the second time I thought, why am I cooking them dinner before they leave with the gifts. We started mailing the gifts to them. (they live about an hour away)

Then we had the non acknowledgment of the mailed items. While he knew the gifts were delivered because of the post office tracking, it was disconcerting not to hear from them. So after about a week I'd email and ask if the gifts had arrived or should DH ask the post office to search for them. Then and only then would H get an email acknowledging the gifts.
Finally, now, after several years of this, the grandkids call and say thank you.

Rags's picture

I disagree that it is not your problem. DH is your equity life partner so it is your problem. I think I would jerk a knot in OSS's tail for that crap. One thing I never tolerated in my blended family adventure was anyone in the blended family opposition mistreating or disrespecting my wife. If they tried it I came down on them like a ton of crap in a one pound bag.

Fortunately my SS would not knowingly do anything to hurt his mom so other than the usual teen boy brain fart behavioral stuff I never had to address any significant disrespect from him directed at my bride... other than lippy crap.