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Freudian Slip!!!

CandyLou's picture

Wait for it, SO keeps saying "I'm sorry, I'll try harder" to which I replied, "what is the actual action that will take place" he says "I'm going to reduce the exclusion..." What!!!! Wouldn't the decent thing to say be "the exclusion will stop" I said "that's like a gang of bullies in the playground going up to their victim and saying "hey, instead of bullying you and excluding you daily, we will reduce it to 3 times per week"...are you kidding me!!!

CandyLou's picture

Oh believe me I'm not!! I went out last night, SO got home before me and was texting me, "where are you?" Then when I got home, not a word about being with skids, it was "how was your night? What were you doing?" I don't want to be at these dinners, but don't tell me you are reducing the exclusion for goodness sake!!!

giveitago's picture

What an idiot! Let him know that he'll exclude you once too often! I am pleased he asked about your had to be better than his! LOL it would have him wondering too!
I agree with stepaside, it is fear; and the fear of handling it any differently too. It's a 'recovery' process for our guys in my belief. It's also a huge transition for a kid to go from getting it all their way to coming to a compromise. I'd let him know that with compromise you each have to give and lose a little ground...right?

StepX2's picture

I just read your past blogs and saw the one from April 2011 about Easter at the skids place.
Now I'm just did all of that work out?

CandyLou's picture

Thanks for your responses everyone! StepX2, I can't even remember that Easter now, so I'm glad you asked so I could realise that we do get over things!! I read the post mentioning I felt sick about going there. I know that was after the Christmas my SO left for four days to spend Christmas with his kids (adult kids)! and in regards to that actual incident, I have to admit that I still do think about that from time to time and resent him, but for the most part I am over that.

Good reminder that "this too shall pass..."

Orange County Ca's picture

You're on the right track. Everytime he's gone the house is locked up, the water supply turned off (so no floods) and you're on your merry way. Lets see, Vegas, Santa Barbara, New Orleans, New York City or just a little visit with Mom or the girlfriends... the list is endless.

Note: turn off the hot water heater also so there is no expansion and burst pipes.

shes driving me crazy in my retirement's picture

Agree with above. No reason you should just sit home by yourself waiting for him to come back. Get out, go on a trip, when he makes plans to go visit them for a few days, you make plans to go somewhere as well.

Tell him you don't want to be left in the house alone while he is out having a good time with his kids, and GO.

I don't think men are afraid of these adult brats, I think they just don't know what to do and how to handle it. Men, generally, do not like emotional confrontation. But OC could let us know if I am right on that or not.

I know when my DH starts having tantrums due to dealing with his Twit and my disengagement, I go, to the show, a nice dinner, etc. I don't want to be his scapegoat for her actions. Generally, after being alone for a day (and one time 2 days as I made a reservation at the casino hotel and stayed overnight, not so much to gamble, but just to get away) he calms down. But it usually takes a week or two.