A trip to visit is approaching
I have sat several visits recently, but sgk's birthday party is around the corner, so I'm going this time. We'll make the 4 hour drive the day before, stay over in a hotel and the party will be in the afternoon of the second day, also the day we leave.
I have already know we will be spending some time on day 1 at BM's house because SD still doesn't have her own place. Since both SGK's are very small and loud, we don't have a lot of options on other places to visit, so I suck it up and get through it because it is what it is. Radical acceptance is all I have when it comes to that one. Without me, DH has made far fewer trips, which is his own doing. I have determined to be selective about when I choose to accompany him because it's just not good for me.
I have observed DH not falling over himself to throw money at SD, too. Just recently she texted him pictures of some decor she wants for SGK's bedroom (they don't have their own place, so this would be going in either BM's house or her in law's pile of rubble). She commented that she was going to redecorate once she has the money. DH commented that it was pretty and left it at that.
To me, it seemed obvious she was hoping he'd volunteer to fund her project, but I was giddy when he didn't. She doesn't work, her lazy husband can't hold a job...they will have to figure it out themselves and I am over the moon that he didn't offer to pay for it.
SD knows DH has a weakness for the grands and wants to give them whatever they want, but hopefully he can continue with fortitude.
I am practicing polite smiling and finding a zen place in my mind to get me through the visit, though. Who knows what fresh hell they will concoct.