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What’s more important?

cpreston's picture

I’ve been noticing that my SS’s girlfriend (21) doesn’t feed the baby meals… like ever

He’s been weaned off breastfeeding and seems to be hungry all the time, and I realized it’s because all she ever gives him are those cereal things and freeze dried yogurt drops and freeze dried fruit and milk

I bought them a “baby bullet” baby food making system thinking that since she doesn’t really work, that she’d have time to make him baby food and such
It never even made it out of the box

Now he’s big enough that he can pick up pieces of stuff and eat it, but she doesn’t bother to sit him down and actually FEED him

I’m concerned that he’s just not getting proper nutrition.

My SS will give him baby food, but he’s not really interested in it anymore, his palate is changing and he’s able to eat ‘table food’ (and he LIKES table food!)

They have no ‘real’ food in the house, so she’s got nothing to make him for meals (plus, she’s pretty lazy… I’m sure it’s just easier to stick a handful of cereal in a bowl and hand the kid a sippy cup)

She eats cereal for breakfast and canned soup for lunch and then waits for him to come home with fast food or hoagies for dinner…
:?

PeanutandSons's picture

Are you looking for easy finger food suggestions, or ways to approach your ss with these concerns?

Maybe make a "gift" of some filling toddler foods. If she sees that he likes them and that its rest, she may keep feeding him more. You didn't say how old the baby was though. But gerber make little toddler tv dinner type meals. They stay in the cabinat and she would just have to heat them up. They come with a meat, a pasta and a veggie. Not the healthiest, but atleast its real food. Also, they make little fruit cups, and veggie cups. My son loved those, even the veggie ones he would eat cold out of the cup (green beans, peas, carrots). If I knew his age I might be able to suggest more.

PeanutandSons's picture

Are you looking for easy finger food suggestions, or ways to approach your ss with these concerns?

Maybe make a "gift" of some filling toddler foods. If she sees that he likes them and that its rest, she may keep feeding him more. You didn't say how old the baby was though. But gerber make little toddler tv dinner type meals. They stay in the cabinat and she would just have to heat them up. They come with a meat, a pasta and a veggie. Not the healthiest, but atleast its real food. Also, they make little fruit cups, and veggie cups. My son loved those, even the veggie ones he would eat cold out of the cup (green beans, peas, carrots). If I knew his age I might be able to suggest more.

my.kids.mom's picture

Bless you for being concerned. There are SO many parents that are totally clueless at all the things poor nutrition can bring on (like asthma!) I made all my daughter's baby food after making my poor son suffer with crap from a jar. The difference in age was only 19 months, but I learned a LOT in that time. There are SO many foods that babies can eat that don't even make it in a jar. If we only feed jarred food, we are seriously limiting their palates. Are you able to stop by for "lunch"? Or even breakfast? I'm wondering how you know what he eats, but it sounds like you have time to make stops and enjoy some meals with the baby? Why not just ask her, and bring food for the baby.

I am concerned about the diets of my bf's kids. BM feeds them typical kid meals, not many healthy things. Their health is suffering. They are older, but it's still bad. I wish more people realized how important nutrition is.

hippiegirl's picture

I don't understand women who can't or won't cook for their kids. When my daughter's friends come over, they are blown away by the fact that I actually stand in my kitchen and make meals. Does he (the baby) eat meals when he's with you?

Disneyfan's picture

Some people just hate to cook.

BM is raising hell because we ate out all weekend. Sorry, if but if I cook all week, I'm not cooking on the weekend.

cpreston's picture

sorry, I've been away from the 'puter for a bit
The baby just turned 1 recently, he’s got bottom 2 teeth and the top 2 are ready to sprout any day… I was thinking: What is more important, to not alienate step-son and his girlfriend even more by possibly overstepping my boundaries, or to just make sure that he’s being properly fed by taking a proactive approach and just making him up little meals for each day
(by the way, HER mother is a hot mess...I can't go to this woman to help with ANYTHING, she's more interested in being a "cool" mom than anything, check out my blog for a description of her)

I don’t know I guess I’m looking for advice of is it too pushy for me to just “do it” and try to have a sit down with her to explain that she can’t possibly just continue to feed him like this

They live with us, so I see how he’s NOT fed on the weekends, unless my husband or I jump in and take over...(hubby likes to go rescue him from his crib Saturday and Sunday mornings, and feed him a real breakfast)
My step-son a few months ago declared “we’re buying our own food” so that’s why there’s a lack of what I would call “real” food in the house… you can’t feed a baby bologna and canned chili! They don’t even have any milk in the house for the last two days..(I guess they’re giving him skim milk, because that’s all I ever buy) so I can surmise by what I've seen and what I haven't seen, that she feeds him no differently when we're around then when we're not around... nothing but sippy cups of milk and juice and hand fuls of cereal and baby fruit snacks

So I try to actually FEEd him a good meal when I can, but that’s not often. Last night, for example, I let my step-son know ahead of time that we were having chicken pot pie and there was enough for EVERYONE,
He took the baby to the mall and fed him Chik-fil-a fried chicken nuggets and waffle fries for dinner… REALLY!?!?

I have a perfectly healthy meal (I do a pretty ‘light’ version of pot pie) with lean chicken breast and lots of veggies and he goes and gives the kid CHIKFILA?

I think I just talked myself into saying ‘screw their feelings’ because I can’t continue to just sit by and watch them feed him poorly.

I have a small container in the fridge with the leftover pot pie and I taped a note on it saying “this would be a great lunch for the baby”

We shall see if she feeds it to him

She’s maybe more likely (since… well yeah, she’s lazy) to feed him stuff that he can pick up and eat himself… so tonight I’m going to poach some chicken breasts and steam some green beans (he LOVES green beans) and peel a half of a ripe pear to dice up.
I can make some extra cream of wheat for breakfast and put that and the lunch aside with a note on them
(too conspicuous?)

PeanutandSons's picture

If I were you, I would start by finding some healthier prepackaged thing. And just say that you saw all this at the store and couldn't resist. If you go to babiesrus they have an entire aisle of organic, or natural baby and toddler foods. Grab a bunch of different ones and see if he likes any. If it rest and prepackaged she might start feeding them to him when she's home alone. My son loved Sammy Jammies (basically a cross between a cereal bar and a sandwich), and the toddler food in the sqweezie pouches (Ella'sKitchen and Plum Organic make really good fruit and veggie mixes), that way he is feeding himself still but he's getting real food.

When you are home, just start feeding him when you eat. Offer him a healthy snack every few hours. Hopefully when she sees that he enjoys eating real food she will be more inclined to keep feeding him.

I think leaving notes and stuff will make them defensive and pull back from any advice you have to give. If you bring food into the house and phrase it like its a gift, I think you will have better luck. "oh, I saw this at the store and thought Lo might like it".... Or "these were on sale at the supermarket, let me know how he likes them. " " I got too many bananas this week and I think they will go bad before we get to them all, can you help me out and see if Lo wants to eat some for us".