Countdown 10 days....will BM give in?
I doubt it.
BM "summer trip" launches on the 21st. STILL no itinerary or location given. She has already violated the CO by not giving 30 days notice and details.
DH is prepared to get the police involved.
The 21st is his CO visitation weekend, the time-frame for this trip will mean DH will miss one full weekend and three partial days of his visitation time. BM has SS for the 4th of July holiday which is the 3-7th, allowing her to plan an extended trip. He has nothing against SS going on this "trip" but told BM that the agreement was conditional on her giving him the CO required information. So far all we know is she's told SS it's not in California, and when DH tried to carefully ask for details (not interrogating, just a general "so do you know where you are going?") SS played the "I don't know" card and looked uncomfortable so DH immediately stopped. BM has trained SS well.
We were told that all DH can do is notify the police that he is supposed to have visitation that day and that he thinks BM has left. The police will go to the house with him as a witness to make sure the pick up isn't possible, and it will get documented. Unsure what follows after documentation. He wanted to try and stop her from boarding with SS at the airport but isn't sure if that is possible.
Unfortunately in our state since she is the custodial parent she has up to 7 days to return with SS, and if she does return the punishment of a $4000 fine + potential jail time of 2 weeks and a felony charge is debatable. Funny, because for the NCP the duration is only 48 hours to return. The CO states that remedies and penalties for wrongful denial of parenting time is punishable by compensatory parenting time, civil penalties, bond requirements, contempt, and reversal of custody.
DH has text message proof of them discussing the dates and requests for the details needed (no response given), as well as DH quoting paragraphs in the CO to BM for reference. Hopefully this helps him but she still isn't budging on giving him details.
I know this is purely a power-play on BM part (not sharing details), since day one she has repeatedly told DH that the CO "doesn't apply to her because she is the mother".
It's frustrating in general to be dealing with this again. It's not like DH wants the details to go "surprise them", he just wants to know where his kid is going to be for two weeks, maybe get a quick phone call in on one of the days he is missing out on due to the trip.
After reading about some of the stipulations that other people have in their CO, I wish DH would have been better prepared and made some adjustments.
Unlike DH I personally don't think she's "fleeing"....she just likes control. She went on two vacations before without telling DH but she did come back. She likes her CS too much to flee.
We'll see what happens.
Edited to add: he has text message proof of himself asking her for the dates (BM did provide) and asking for the details per the CO (no response)