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Skid update & other drama-filled cyber snacks

momjeans's picture

Well, December 17th, DD’s birthday AND skid’s Christmas visitation arrival date rolled around and it was surprisingly wonderful. 

The kids and I followed through with the plans I set forth for that day to celebrate her birthday. We went out of town to have fun at a massive children’s museum; I generously shopped for DD (and DS) in the gift shop; we went out for a fun meal at an interactive local restaurant. I paid for ALL of it and it felt SO good.

DH ended-up taking the 17th off and insisted on tagging along, being his predictable ever-so-attentive self, all loving and involved (insert eye roll and cackle). I put 110% in to make sure DD enjoyed her day, by engaging in niceties with DH. 

DH didn’t bring up skid ONCE. How smart of him.

The following day, DH’s regular scheduled day off, was spent with skid + our kids, going out to lunch and putting skid in charge of holiday crafts with the littles, apparently. I get home from work, we exchange “hellos” and skid looks visibly bothered that I’m not rolling out a red carpet and doing cartwheels down it to welcome her. 

In six days, I’ve managed to only see her twice - and it has been glorious. 

I’ve inquired about skid zero times, while I’ve inquired about DH’s older, functioning alcoholic brother a handful of times. His well-being, if he’ll be here for Christmas with his daughter, etcetera. 

MIL didn’t text me to wish DD a Happy Birthday, followed by a gazillion emojis, like she normally does on her birthday. I take this as a win for me, because MIL is possibly realizing that I indeed do NOT like her. And now that I think about it, it took a good three days for her to even give DD a birthday gift. Part of me thinks it was a game on her part. To see if I would come unraveled at the thought she wasn’t going to gift DD anything.

Y’all, I couldn’t care less. Truly. 

In regards to drunk BIL, apparently he is couching it at his ex fiancés place, the mother of his child, because he was evicted from his place. Oh, and her current boyfriend lives with her too. Oh boy, talk about Three’s Company, huh? 

It’s still a mystery if BIL is currently working, but according to my in-laws he’s most likely not due to inactivity in his bank account. More eye rolls.

Last night DH told me that his brother is currently staying at a hotel, on ex fiancé and her current boyfriend’s dime, because current boyfriend’s parents are in town visiting for Christmas. My in-laws seem very bothered by their manchild spending Christmas in a hotel. I’m sitting here just waiting for that ax, aka text to fall, asking me to watch skid while they travel to BIL’s city to put all of his stuff in storage and try to convince him to move back home with codependent mommy and daddy. 

Nope, no no no, nope. 

This is going to be a great holiday! 

 

Comments

Petronella's picture

I'm so glad your DD had a good birthday! How did DH manage to tag along on your out of town trip though - didn't he have to go pick up the Princess from the airport??

momjeans's picture

Thank you! 

DH managed to tag along by using a lot of charm, of course, and my desire to not exclude him for DD’s sake.

I think my DH second guesses my ability to do things all on my own. I don’t know why, because I’m fiercely independent and all that jazz. I think it’s his upbringing in a codependent and enabling family. I think he expects people to fold and need help, or whatever. 

That said, I wish I could capture the look on my therapist’s face when I tell her all of these things. LOL. 

hereiam's picture

his brother is currently staying at a hotel, on ex fiancé and her current boyfriend’s dime

Jesus, what? What is wrong with people?  I mean, okay, it's the holiday season and it's nice of the ex and her BF (although, weird), but does BIL have NO self respect?

momjeans's picture

My thoughts exactly. 

I thought I had heard it all when DH told me his brother was crashing at their place, but then to put him up in a hotel to have him out of sight and mind!? 

All I could do was shake my head.

I feel for my BIL. I really do. But, this is hardcore alcoholism at play. It’s sad - and my in-laws have totally enabled him to go down this dark and lonely road. I have little to no respect for my MIL and FIL after all of this.

And I agree. It is VERY weird.

Iamwoman's picture

Congrats Momjeans!

It feels good when we finally throw our hands in the air and do whatever the hell we want, with who we want, doesn't it?

Not your circus, not your monkies. It sounds like you have lovely bios, and I'm glad DH is finally straightening up.

SD being surprised that the world doesn't revolve around her... now where have I seen that type of entitled behavior before? ... oh right, my and many other's skids as well. When will these skids learn that they are not the center of our universes, and that moreso, they are all just one of a billion skids exactly like them... Same story, different players. Yawn to SD's antics.

Merry Christmas momjeans!

momjeans's picture

Your words mean a lot to me. Thank you, Iamwoman. 

The dynamics within this family are nothing short of comical to me anymore. I used to care, until I learned no amount of caring would encourage others to change for the better.

It truly is liberating. It allows me time and space to care for and devote time to those that matter. 

Merry Christmas to you and yours!