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Summer and BM's awol.

Dontfeedthetrolls's picture

So it’s summer finally. Kids got out Thursday last week and as normal BM started messaging about SO getting them early. He was supposed to pick up Friday but agreed to get them from school. As usual BM is MIA already. BM isn’t responding to messages and forget about her calling the kids. She hasn’t even set dates for her mid break visit. It’s frustrating because the youngest is already asking when they go back and we have no answer for him. I’m expecting us to have them most of the summer which isn’t an issue except again we don’t know what to tell the little one when he asks about mom.

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Dontfeedthetrolls's picture

BM won't answer. SO will message her that the kids want to talk and she doesn't respond. We don't want to put him on the phone to have her not answer or if she does respond thinking she's talking to SO and going off like she has in the past.

beebeel's picture

Let the phone go to VM and have the kid leave a message. Or follow any of the other helpful suggestions below.

Dontfeedthetrolls's picture

Thank you but again the fear is that she will answer and start yelling before she realizes it's the kid. SO and BM do NOT call each other without texting in agreement first.

Siemprematahari's picture

we don’t know what to tell the little one when he asks about mom.

Your H telling them the truth. He hasn't heard from their mother yet and waiting for her to get in contact...that's it, plain & simple.

tog redux's picture

Yep, "Don't know yet, we haven't heard from Mom. We'll let you know when we do."

Pammyc27's picture

Absolutely. Will his feelings be hurt? Of course. But what will he think if he just continues to not get an answer from you guys about when he can see his mom. Don’t let this fall on you two looking like the bad guys no way. That’s it. Tell the truth. You haven’t heard back you’ve left messages. Poor kid 

Dontfeedthetrolls's picture

We have told him we don't know. We don't want to blame BM and while he accepts the answer the oldest makes it harder because she has a basic understanding that there is a custody order. We don't want to flat out say "we don't know because your mom won't answer text messages and doesn't seem to want to talk to you." They will ask we send her pictures of this or that from time to time. Like when they make sort of art picture or we go to the park. I'll send it and let her know which kid wanted me to send it and would like to talk to her.