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College Life is over for SD

Daisymazy2's picture

The first semester has been over for a while but I just found out that she isn't going back to college.  Each time DH would see SD since the semester ended, he would come back with a little more information and I was finally able to put all the pieces together. I am not sure if SD wasn't telling him the entire story or if he was still in delusion land thinking SD was going to actually graduate from college.  He still tells everyone she is still in college and she isn't.  

After putting all the pieces together,  I realized that SD failed her first semester.  She wasn't going back.   SD told DH that she failed because of the week she was out getting treatment for her STDs.  She said the professors wouldn't let her make up any work.  I told him that didn't seem possible.  I am sure they would have let her make up the work.  She would have had to ask in a reasonable time and turned in the work in a reasonable time.  Even if her grades were halfway decent, she would be able to miss a few assignments without failing.

I was really shocked that she didn't get kicked out for behavioral issues like she did when she was in high school.  She did spend most of the time at college by herself.  She complained that no one wanted to be her friend so she stayed in her room watching TV.

Now she has given up the plans to become a college professor and has decided to be a veterinarian tech.   She will only have to go to school for a year to get a certificate.  We will see how that plays out.  I am almost certain it will have the same ending as being a college professor.

 I am curious about the so-called scholarship she received.  She said she received a scholarship for her grades to pay for the 4 years of college and that the scholarship will pay for the classes to be a veterinarian tech.  I  really think she is lying.   

 

Comments

tog redux's picture

Who needs a week off to treat an STD? Was she in the hospital on an IV?

Well, at least she's able to change her plans to something possibly more realistic. Do let us know which vet she goes to work for so we can all avoid them. 

Daisymazy2's picture

The college wouldn't let her come back until she was fever free.  They made her leave because she was running a fever. She was taken to the ER by BM and that is when it was discovered that she had Stds 

 

 

Daisymazy2's picture

According to sd, they didn't. I am almost sure they did.

justmakingthebest's picture

Yeah... I smell some BS there. College professors are usually way more lenient than high schools are. If she had a dr note they would most certainly let her make up her assignments and any tests/quizzes.

However, it is probably best that she is going for vet tech. It is a realistic time frame for a certification, she can build on it if she wants to. Most importantly it will lead to a job to a job making around $15/hr. Which isn't a lot of money but is enough she could move out of her parents homes and support her self (likely with a roommate). 

notarelative's picture

  She said she received a scholarship for her grades to pay for the 4 years of college and that the scholarship will pay for the classes to be a veterinarian tech.

I'd be curious about that too. I've been on scholarship committees for two different groups. Both required successful completion (with a required GPA) of each semester before the money for the next semester was released. In both cases if your GPA fell below a certain point your scholarship disappeared. 

The vet tech programs I am familiar with here are two years so I'd also be curious exactly what she was signing up for if I were DH.

But, as a SM, if DH wasn't be asked to fund this, I'd just sit back and enjoy the show.

 

Daisymazy2's picture

DH wasn't asked to pay and it isn't in the court documentation for him to pay half of college.   BM could take DH back to court for it, I guess but according to a lawyer here in VA, it isn't likely that it would be added now after SD is 18 and graduated from high school.  We will see though.

advice.only2's picture

your SD reminds me of Spawn...I have learned if their lips are moving it means they are lying...and so far I have never been wrong.

I have a feeling something will happen to prevent your SD from completing this program, if it's real. Also she obviously she wasn't that lonely if she had a raging case of STDs.

Daisymazy2's picture

I feel the same way.   Whenever her mouth is moving she is lying and I am almost sure something will happen from either starting this class or finishing it.

Catmom024's picture

Yup.  My SO's daughter failed out first semester as well.  Then she disappeared, moved in with a low life and had a kid.

Daisymazy2's picture

she can't get pregnant.  The Dr told her that the STDs had spread to her fallopian tubes and that she may not be able to get pregnant. BM has been taking SD to the Dr for the Depo shot and I hope she is continuing to do so. 

I know, it sounds mean but I just don't think she would ever be able to handle a baby.   

 

TwoOfUs's picture

Former college professor here. We're required by law to allow students to make up work that was missed due to illness. We can't ask what the illness was...but especially given that she was in the hospital, this is a no-brainer.

At the college level (not even course by course) she can request either a medical withdrawal (she doesn't get credit for the semester but no F's on the transcript either and the semester doesn't count against any scholarships) or an incomplete / extension due to medical reasons (gets to make up the work on her own time within a set timeframe, which is usually very generous. Again, required by law.

So yeah...that excuse is BS.

Daisymazy2's picture

When DH mentions this again,  I will bring this to his attention.  I am sure SD will try to convince him otherwise though but it is good to know.

I am certain that SD just didn't bother to try.  She thought these classes were going to be so easy.  She went to an alternative (children with bad behavior) school and teachers would hand out a one-page study guide and she would ace the class easily by reading the study guide.  I told her that college was a different ball game and she HAD to study.  She just didn't get it.  She was too busy on her dating apps trying to find a man wh@re that would drive to the middle of nowhere and  "date" her. 

 I am not sure if withdrawing from classes would have helped her.  I don't think she was or is mentally ready for college.  

TwoOfUs's picture

Well a medical withdrawal would help if she's eligible for one because the semester wouldn't count against her GPA or affect any scholarships if she does get her head screwed on straight and decides to go back...

Feel free to PM me with more specific details if you want. I've currently helped 5 young people I care about apply for and get medical withdrawals...all at different schools.

That said...sounds like she made up the medical stuff and just bailed on classes (doesn't mean she couldn't get the medical withdrawal if she claims mental health issues :-/) 

When I taught I had students who skipped 80% or more of classes and who were missing over half of their assignments ask me during the last week of classes if there was anything they could do to pass the class.

I always said: "Absolutely! Build a time machine, go back to the beginning of the semester, and make better decisions."

But I'm a b**** like that.