Just need to vent
So as many of you know, our BM is a real peach. When we took BM to court in 2019, BM motioned to have two stipulations added to the CO, both of which were approved by the judge. BM's hill to die on was SS9 not missing football and that was her sole argument through all of court. The first stipulation is that both parents have to notify the other parent if SS9 spends the night anywhere other than that parent's residence. This means literally anywhere; family's houses, friend's houses, vacations, etc. BM wanted this stipulation added to keep tabs on SS when he is with us and to use the information to harass DH by telling him how much she disapproves of us taking SS places overnight. We can never tell if BM keeps up her end 100%, and we have caught her not telling us a few times "accidentally," but we do hear from her occasionally that SS is sleeping over somewhere. The second stipulation is that DH's visitation cannot interfere with SS9's football. In the summer, DH is entitled to 4 weeks time, but the stipulation allows BM to move that 4 weeks around to accomodate SS' football. This led to a huge fight with BM this spring, but never resulted in a change of parenting time, although I know it can and likely will in the future. It is also stipulated that we have SS9 for Labor Day weekend UNLESS he has a football game. Well since SS started playing football three years ago, he has always had a game on Labor Day weekend, so every year, DH loses that weekend, meaning we don't see SS from July to Thanksgiving or Christmas due to the long distance schedule. This fact sucks, but we have learned to accept it.
So last week, BM emails DH that her GF's cousin is getting married a few hours outside of town and that SS will need to go since they don't have childcare. They said they were going to be out of town Friday and Saturday night, staying at GF's parents' house. DH didn't care since SS' football game wasn't until 2 p.m. today, which gave BM and GF plenty of time to bring SS back for his game. They literally could have left at 11 a.m. and had SS back in time for the game.
So DH calls SS tonight like normal and what does he learn??? SS is still at GF's parents' house and SS missed his game. SS said they were leaving GF's parents' around 8 p.m., which would get them home at 11 p.m. tonight, which doesn't really matter since SS doesn't have school tomorrow. But DH was pissed. So it's okay for SS to miss football because of BM, and this game could have been easily attended, yet heaven forbid SS miss football to see DH. We know it is a reoccurring trend with our BM and that we can't change it, but it's still annoying every time it happens. DH just keeps reminding himself and me that our baby girl will be here in a few short months and to ignore it, especially since we can't change BM and this lousy situation. Plus calling BM out for it will only unleash BM's narc tendencies and we will be "in the wrong" for something since BM is never wrong, so it's not worth it.
Oh and a few months ago, BM said that SS accused me of eavesdropping on all of SS' phone calls with her and GF, which is a bold-faced lie because I am rarely even around when he calls them. We confronted SS about this during last visitation and SS denied saying this. I 100% believe BM made it up. While Skyping SS tonight, whose heads do I see peeking out from the top of the stairs behind SS on the couch??? BM and GF... for the entire conversation. They thought they were being so sneaky, yet we could see half of both of their faces for the whole 15 minute call. Can you say projection much??? Gosh, I hate these women!