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SIL is an entitled evil adult COD

BettyRay's picture

A little background information so you won't be confused - my sister is gay and her partner of almost 10 years is a COD.

SIL decided 2 weeks ago that she didn’t want to spend Thanksgiving at my Mom’s. SIL decided that they should spend it with their friends instead.

Fine – but they had already accepted my Mom’s invitation.

My sister brought it up to me and I told her to just tell Mom the truth that you made other plans OR suck it up and spend Thanksgiving with us.

Well SIL decided to call my mom and cancel Thanksgiving. SIL threw my under the bus in the process.

SIL did not just decline my Mom’s invitation she dropped a bomb on my Mom. SIL told my Mom that they were making other plans for Thanksgiving because BettyRay and her DH didn’t really want to celebrate Thanksgiving because BettyRay’s Skids were with their BM on Thanksgiving and it was a hardship for BettyRay’s DH.


Yet again SIL has manipulated a situation to get what she wants, her selfishness knows no bounds, she doesn’t care who she hurts in the process as long as it’s all about her and she gets what she wants.

The truth is I told my sister that Mom is focused on celebrating the holiday on the actually day and that sometimes it’s hard on us because we don’t have the Skids for every holiday and my Mom just thinks I can just tell BM we need the Skids here at X time on Y holiday.

DH and I spent the last 2 days doing damage control with my Mom. Mom is so hurt – I hate that SIL hurt her to get what she wanted.

And my sister is totally defending SIL. I’m done with them.



oneoffour's picture


I think you need to tell your Mum that they are very wrong and you are looking forward to celebrating T/Giving with her as grown ups. You get to eat what you want, claim the remote and take her out to watch some local tree-lighting ceremony or something similar.
Do not bring up your SIL. Act as if she doesn't exist. I have a rather spiteful sister. She and I are not seeing eye to eye on things and she will throw me under the bus in a flash if she could. However I refuse to throw her under the bus. I absolutely refuse to but oh my, have the opportunities arisen even with me here in the USA and the rest of my family on the other side of the world.

I will not lower myself to her level.

BettyRay's picture

I told my Mom exactly that they were wrong and DH and I plan to have a quiet and happy Thanksgiving with her.

I didn't mention SIL at all to Mom.

On a side note I'm just so over the drama with those two. I refuse to feed into their drama anymore.


Onewillfullstepmom's picture

COD... C*** of death?????...... oh child of divorce.... No, definitely c*** of death Blum 3

BettyRay's picture

Thanks Echo.

I had distanced myself from them but then my Mom had a medical scare and I needed to work with my sister to help Mom.

She's my only sibling and I'm sad our relationship is like this. But I will not let SIL continue to drop bombs on me and hurt my Mom.