anyone out there with twins i am pregnant with twins a girl and boy and i have SS and i would like to know any advice of how to deal and keep balance and my head on my shoulders once they get here

My SD 9 lives with us and goes with her mom on the weekends. Her dad has pretty much raised her all her life. She is 9 and of course a daddy's girl. So sorry, but I have no bond or desire to bond with this child. She is spoiled, a simple whine gets her way! Last night I cooked spaghetti which my husband ate, my son who is 8 also ate, but SD9 refused to eat it. Got up and went over to her dad to say that she didn't like it. Now had that been my son, he'd be at the table staring at a bowl of spaghetti until he fell asleep. My husband of course got up and made her top ramen!

Still in limbo- process is gruelingly slow. Can't elaborate on all that obviously.

Still stuck emotionally b/c I don't recognize the man anymore. I don't see any glimpse of the one I forever bragged about on here as the most emotionally supportive and loving man I'd ever known. I guess MOW is the one that's reserved for now. She is getting to see all that passion, compassion, etc. All that caring only what she wants in life, just as he once treated me. Just as he once revered me.

5 Years ago i got implants and I was still going to my doc as I ahd to go fora full year after ward. We had a cell phone that was paid up till the end of that month as we got a better plan and company. We gave that phone to the skids so they could call dh till it was shut off. We knew that bm would use it too but we weren't worried as it was paid and no fear of her running it up. Anyway I forgot to tell my plastic surgeon that I have a new # and he called my other phone.

When I first moved in a year ago SD9 (she was 8 at the time) was a quiet and wonderful behaved little girl. She went and stayed the summer with her BM and came back the demon child. She was caught in the act of LYING to her gma by my BD11 over the weekend. We had already pretty much come to the conclusion that she was going over to her gma's house and pouting and crying about how unfair we all are to her (although we aren't, in fact it is she and her gma that are unfair to my Bkids).

So, it's been 3 weeks since sd's come to our house. I'm wondering if she'll come tomorrow. DH usually doesn't tell me anything unless I ask him outright and a long time ago I promised myself that I would never bring up SD or BM unless she was at our house, it has saved alot of arguements. It's like a little weird game that we play, we both pretend that SD doesn't exist until she's actually there. It's working so I guess we'll keep doing it.

Tell me if anybody else thinks this is as F-ed up as I do...

BM has no land line (used to but got cut off because she couldn't/wouldn't pay the bill). She and SD use their cell phones. SD11 is not exactly the most responsible person in the world when it comes to taking care of her cell phone or remebering to bring it let alone charge it. It has been lost in the maze of MESS in BM's house countless times.

today was my ultrasound apointment i posted it on myspace and everything and i promised to take SS with me and as i was leaving ot the door BM calls to take him for 2 hours and she knows i was taking him with me and DH says yes he said so i can relax he knows i wanted SS there so now im home looking a te pics of my twins waiting f9or SS to come back man why is BM such a bitch !

I have never considered myself my skids mom as they have one. But at the same time bm has made very clear to me and skids that they are NOT to call me mom nor am I to call myself their mom. Ok that is fine with me.

Ladies....I have been in most of your shoes about the last 3 yrs. I felt defeated! I felt like taking my own child and running to the other side the world! I wanted to hit someone or the most run them over! I wanted to scream so loud that the whole neighborhood knew it was me! I wanted to give my SD10 the ass whipping I believe she needs...sorry if most of you don't agree but I got one when I was young and I turned out just fine...as a matter of fact my own 3 kids get it when they need it.