So, this is not me.. but someone I know.... and she is the BM...but wants to know what is appropriate.. boundaries.. etc.. re her Exes' custody time. Specifically.. when her children have sporting events.

It seems I have weathered the long onslaught and come out pretty alright.

Big positives that I want to list:

-camp host job last summer: won the community parade float, DH made deep friends, got invited back for this upcoming season

-in person visits with my three youngest sons (23,26,27) where they all have acknowledged the teenage years and we were able to have an adult moment of closure. 

-BM died.

-DH bought me a small house on the 13th green of a treasure of a retirement golf course resort. I have a riverside walking path, too!

This is probably more of a vent because I just need to say it and I probably have put this type of post on here before and I am sorry if I repeat. .I just really want to understand why he keeps at it with SKs.  SD has been having SO do her taxes and she kept pushing it off.  She finally said she had BM do it. This is something SO looks forward doing with her. He told her that it he was disappointed because it was time he could spend with her. Of course then he starts bothering her about seeing him. She finally said she could do breakfast. He of course pleads with me to go.

We returned from our cruise with SS12 - now 13. It was a really great trip. SS said it was the best vacation he has ever been on. He was able to snorkel in the Bahamas, go on a full island tour, eat tons of good food, and buy several souvenirs. SS and DH decided to buy matching watches to remember the trip. SS was talkative, loving to DD, and overall fully engaged this vacation. SS turned 13 while on the ship, so we had the room decorated and I brought huge "13" foil balloons to set out. SS loved it. 

I have a SD(27) who I had a great relationship with until she turned  around 11years old,  and has made life a struggle since. Recently, after years of not talking, she apologized for payments she wasn't making on a loan she asked her dad to co-sign for and told him she never ended up needing the loan. She told him she declined the money. Well, that was a lie and it's been years of trying to get her to make payments. She came up to visit, apologized for not paying it and said she doesn't know why she doesn't pay it and is going to start paying it, which also turned out to be a lie.

I've been a step mom for a couple years now. When I started dating my partner his daughters were 13 and 11 years old. Now they are 16 and 18. Their mother was barely in the picture. Only came around when it was convienent for her. I had a great relationship with both of them. We spent so much time together.

After the mother saw the relationship that the girls and I had, then she wanted to be in the picture every day. I never stood in the way of that. I've always expressed how I think its important for them to have a relationship with their mother. 

So in my case, although Chef is way worse than ex-husband number one and ex-husband number two combined as far as personality, demeanor, baggage and habits, his parents have long past so I don't have to deal with MIL and FIL issues although if they are alive I'm certain I would.

I'm looking at this from the divorced dad's perspective  but I'm missing a lot of info.  Anyway, my 80+ male neighbor died 10 months ago.  He married his wife, who was living there with her 1st husband, when we moved in 51 years ago.  They seemed very happy, she had been in a very limited situation and the new husband, R, was proud to take her to car races, out in his boat, etc 

Hi everyone, been a little while.

Im currently on a beautiful vacation with DH and 'ours babies'

Hello All, 

I've been a step mom for a couple years now. When I started dating my partner his son was 2 years old. Now he is soon to turn 5. I had hoped being in his life so early that we would grow a strong bond and a great relationship. 
 

now this far in, I question it a lot. An example, today his mother dropped him off to me for part of the day and over night. She no more than left and he said he wanted to go to his moms. And then sat there saying he wished his dad was home.