Never hurts to ask, Right?

No its not unfair. My dh and his ex had four kids... each claimed two kids. When it was in the paperwork that when the oldest aged out they would alternate years on the youngest until the second child aged out.. then each would claim one, until the third child aged out. Then once again they would alternate until the final child aged out.

Reality the BM in your case ISNT WORKING, the court would then likely grant your DH the ability to claim the child every year since he would get a tax break and BM wouldnt.

Alternately, your DH could push for BM could claim the kid every year, and subtract the standard child tax credit from any CS responsibility.

Example: (using totally fake numbers here) if the standard tax credit for the kid is $2k and BM is allowed to claim the kid, then your DH gets CS credit for 2k or $166.67 per month reduction in his CS payment monthly.

A majority of the courts would grant every other year, or if there is more then one child, split the children so both parents can claim one each year. So no, he's not being unfair.

My Ds and his ex-wife take turns claiming SGS every year. I had to laugh as I was just reading your other blog where BM went crazy going on about 'it's not legal, it's not fair, it's all about money for you'

Nope. Tell your DH to stop second guessing himself and go for it. He'll either get it or not. That little exchange at the store between the two of them where it started off nice and went quickly to bad is exactly why parents have to end up end up doing these kinds of things in court....when it comes to the money and who has to do this or that all social friendly little 'let's work this out' goes right out the window.

It's very fair that DH is asking this. And good for DH to have the balls to stand up to the BM and not just slink away like Chef does with the Amazonian Matron.

Since you have to hire a lawyer anyway, I would definitely ASK for every year ... again with the understanding that every other year will be an appropriate compromise.

My ex-DH claims our one child every year. Unfortunately for me it made the most fiscal sense since he makes 10x what I do ... but, I am amenable since he pays CS and is trying to be a dad. However, I try not to be a "whack-a-doodle" BM/ex-DW in general. (I have sometimes slipped up and flared at the Russian SM, but she is now in the Ukraine so life has settled down again.)

In my state, alternating years is the norm, unless there is a huge disparity in income such as my case.

The threat of withholding visitation is such a passive/aggressive thing, I think there is something like a court-mandated forced compliance that you can use to ensure visitation. Perhaps custody exchanges at the local police station for a time will help. Combine humiliation with documentation. Regarding transportation? I'd settle for the tax deduction and forced compliance to visitation and just write-off transportation costs as a fact of life. Too bad you can't deduct from CS ... but if it's not in the CO?

Good for DH to want to be an active member of his child's life. Keep your eye on the big picture or these little annoying details will derail you.

If your DH is paying child support, then absolutely he deserves every other year! He has a kid, he's supporting him, so he should get the tax credit. Like others wrote, since your BM isn't working, he should ask for every year. If she gets a job, she can file to get it changed to every other year. Your DH should not question this.

I brought up to Chef that he could take this opportunity to rectify the claiming "at least one skid" up legally to an equitable rotation. HELL no. The attorney convinced him that he may have to go to court more than once to get this rectified. Chef turned and looked at me: "I'm not going through that. It's done, see? I don't wanna hear anything more about the taxes! Case closed."

Translation: I'm more than content to continue to let the BM have WAAAAY more than her fair share when it comes to claiming skids on taxes and CS. So BM will go on claiming two skids and come April, Chef will owe boatloads of taxes with ZERO deductions--all to keep the BM happy and quiet. :barf: :barf:

Is it not the standard in the US for parents to alternate on tax forms every other year? I thought that was how it plays out? I am not from here originally. My DH lets both BMS claim the kids yearly, they both make less than he and it helped in court to appease them both in that way. My ex and I used to alternate, but I too let him claim her every year since I am not working for the past few years and he is working full time. He pays cs to me, so it seems fair to me for him to get that money. It pleased him greatly for me to do that for my ex. My husband owns his own businesses and does itemize (that word? is right?) and gets money back for things too. I think whatever works for the DH who does pay CS and sees the kids and for them BM who pays and sees kids to share the money one would get back. If DH and yourself want that then go after it and let the BM flip out, it wont be up to her in the end anyways.