Thinking a lot these past few days
A problem that I have is that I have no one to talk to. My GF from HS called out of the blue a month ago and I enlightened her as to how bad things had gotten. She gave me the name of a good attorney, so I have two that I could go to. At what point do you make that decision? I know things won't change with DH and the SDs and I am hyper-sensitive to everything lately.
Or maybe the moments of clarity are really becoming evident.
DH doesn't acknowledge me sometimes when we're in the same room because he's so absorbed in sports or tweeting. I know he hears me, he just doesn't do me the respect of answering until I make a loud, sarcastic comment, or simply tell him to get off his ass like a mother would do to a teenager.
I have had chronic pain for years and because of FM I have problems with sensory overload. It makes my head go crazy because my brain can't handle it. It's described as the body not knowing when to stop and start with all of the input it's receiving, like the brakes are messed up. DH always drives too fast for me, and even though I've gotten better at tolerating it since I went off of Lyrica, it's always the same. I feel he doesn't respect me enough to think of how I'm feeling when he drives me places. So, I hardly ever go anywhere with him. We had a wedding to go to last night and we're on the East Coast. There was so much rain here that the lanes on the sides of the highway were flooded and only the middle lane was safe. DH was getting pissy and didn't want to slow down. Again, like a damn teenager, so I have to reprimand him over and over while I'm getting sick to my stomach. It happens every time. Last night's drive was an hour and a half each way. Never again.
He just pulled up so I'll add more later, but the disrespect keeps piling up. He doesn't value me. At all. And he thinks everything is fine.