You are here

Oh whoa is everyone tell me how special I am!

CantKeepDoingThis's picture

HHB got the letter today that said she did not make AP Theater. So now starts the flood of posts to social media about how depressed she is, and that she's feeling worthless! Here comes the reply flood from everyone telling her how great she is. I'm actually surprised that she didn't immediately call DH crying about it, as that is her usual thing. She knows dear daddy will tell her she is the best as always, and that he is so sorry she didn't make it! Gag! I can tell you why she didn't make it...those failing grades! HHB probably will not get 2nd semester credit for chemistry or geometry...5 days of school left, and she is failing both classes. Supposedly, she can pull the semester grade IF she scores really high on her final...but she made 60's on her mid-terms in both of these courses her first semester, barely passing the semester for credit while living with us. I'm certain that grades were a consideration for picking who would be in AP Theater. I mean, you don't want students who are at risk of not being able to perform because of failing grades.

So whoa is me....didn't make theater...probably going to have to take stuff over, which means maybe no color guard. I wouldn't be surprised if they make her drop guard to make room in her schedule to retake chemistry and geometry! High schools really don't like keeping students past 4 years, and they will drop you from electives if they have to in order to get you graduated!

Oh, and let's not forget the sob story HHB was giving DH today about BM and stepdad being broke! I doubt they really are...I'm betting stepdad is saying that because he is tired of BM mismanaging the child support and he is getting stuck paying for crap! HHB tried to tell him they didn't even have money to buy her clothes (which DH pays plenty in child support for her to get clothing)! Of course, we have to remember that HHB thinks she needs new clothes every month, and probably has more clothing than BM and stepdad and little brother put together! She did stop by her several weeks ago and picked up a load of clothes! However, from pictures I've seen, she may have gained too much weight for her clothes! But broke? She got a new dress for that prom (no, the one DH had to take her did NOT fit) and shoes. She also got her nails done, and somehow has money to buy hair dye every other week (as she is always changing her color). Yeah, my bet is that stepdad got like me, and put an end to the crazy spending because BM would not say DH! They better not start trying to ask DH for extras! He really is broke...he has obligations to this house that I'm already having to help cover, and he has his bills (car, credit cards, etc.). This bank remains closed!

BarkAtTheMoon's picture

Tell HHB that since she is done growing, she shouldn't be buying new clothes (although we know she is still "growing" lol). Has anyone explained to her that BM has all of the money that is supposed to be for her benefit? You don't have to give her a dollar figure, but explain that, Yes, DH DOES in fact bring money over every month to provide for HHB since BM can't. And remind her that SDad is NOT obligated to.

I know this conversation would have to come from DH, so it probably won't happen, but how AWARE is HHB about the CS?

As for the grades, I think it's hysterical that she didn't make theater because her damn ego keeps telling her she is GREAT at everything! I understand that you are anxious about her being held back and CS going to BM for longer, BUT......I would stop looking at her social media. Other than the phone bill usage, I wouldn't delve into anything. That's all I do with SD19, is look at data usage. I blocked her on FaceBook when she was about 15 because she made terrible comments to DH about her then-terminal BM who was dying of cancer. SD19 was 15 at the time and had a big attitude. So, DH put a picture of the car we owned (that we were giving to her) on FB and the caption read "$3500 OBO" as if he was going to sell it. DH was messing with her because she was being an enabled, entitled royal BITCH. You know what SD posted? "Daddy if you sell MY car then YOU will have to drive me EVERYWHERE when BM IS DEAD!" Yep, she used the words, "...when Mommy is DEAD." :jawdrop:

I saw the post and called DH at work, told him to call that little bitch immediately and put controls on her cell phone for a week as a punishment. He did. And since that day I have blocked her on FB. I can't imagine the chest pains I would have if I had to see all of the selfies and sorority crap on there now. When SD was in HS she did the whoa is me stuff, too, posting song lyrics that were just depressing attention-getters.

All I do now is check the Verizon Mobile account on my app and see where everyone's data usage is. SD13 just got her FIRST cell phone yesterday and I told DH that the SDs have to be locked down on the data usage or maybe they could pay us for the overage? DH is clueless, and told me they each can have 3Gigs. I informed him that SD19 uses close to 5Gs a month and SD13 will blow through it on bus rides to school, so maybe we need to put controls on their phones? I did that last summer with SD19 when she blazed through usage at the beach and then had no data/web usage on her drive home. She got lost because she couldn't use Google Maps. }:) Remember that one?

As for HHB, why don't you ask DH if you can put controls on her phone now? You know, because her grades are so bad? The phone is really provided by you because of the financial situation, so you should be able to lock it down or cancel it. I know it would start WW3, but since CS is being sent to BM, then BM can pay for HHB. BM should have HHB on HER plan. But what I'm saying is, is that in light of the bad grades, MAYBE DH will agree to no cell during school hours except for maybe lunch and when school lets out? Then lock it down again at 9pm at night until 7am the next morning.

I think it would be hilarious! Start with the idea that she shouldn't have a phone PERIOD, which he'll never go for. Then lower the pain by saying it needs to be locked out during certain times or she needs to be OFF of your plan. She needs to concentrate on her STUDIES. LOL Is HHB going to take summer school? Even more reason to minimize phone usage during school hours. Or let BM handle a cell phone bill for HHB since she is doing such a superb job in all other areas with her DD! LMAO }:)

~ Moon

Rags's picture

Oh the FB drama trolls. They are rampant. My SIL and my wife's cousin are the worst that I have seen.

Always posting drama troll hooks with no information like "Life sucks", "I am sad", "The (man/boss/bank/power company/etc..) is an asshole!", "Why is the world out to get me?". The crap is incessant.

No detail. Just a short sentence with a pouty face. Then the drama minions come running to offer condolences, comiserate on misery, agree that (asshole flavor of the moment) is truly an asshole, etc.... Eventually when the troll has the desired attention the facts come out.

After a while I can no longe bite my tongue! }:)

"So, what are you doing to fix it?"
"Why keep doing the same the same thing repeatedly while expecting a different outcome?"
"So, rather than send out a cry for attention why don't you share what actually happened?"
"If you actually studied for the CPA exam you might just pass a section every once in a while. Your cousin busted her hump for a year and studied incessently. That is why she passed 3 sections on her first sitting. You think taking it on a computer one section every three months is hard? Try taking all four sections with pencil and paper in an auditorium over a single weekend. Suck it up buttercup!!!"
"Nope, we are not sending you any money. The last time you needed help we sent money and you took a vacation. When are going to pay us back?

Of course.... then I am asshole. A title I proudly flaunt with the social media drama trolls that are related to my amazing bride.

Sadly my side of our gene pool has one too. I have a cousin in that class. She is my second cousin. My aunt's grandaughter. She is always gushing about how amazing her husband is and also about how broke they are, etc... The drama minions flock to her in hordes.

"Yes he is so wonderful!"
"The two of you are so amazing!"
"We looooove youuuuuuu!"


Then I show up.

"You know Cuz, if Mr. Wonderful had not failed a drug test and had not been booted from the Army on a dishonorable you might not be so broke and he might be able to get a job. Did you think about that? Not so wonderful after all is he?"

"If you had not quit college you would have your degree by now and would very likely not be having money problems. Get your butt back in school and quit whining!!!" }:)

Then the drama minions decide that I am an asshole and think that I give a shit about their opinions.

Funny, the drama trolls never unfriend me for some reason. :? Dirol

Time to respond to HHB's attempts to troll for drama and support.

"Well sweetie .... they don't accept "F" students in AP drama. Though you efforts to troll for drama online are impressive."
"Color guard will be gone next. They do not accept "F" students either."
"Try actually studying and doing your work. Let his know how that works out for you."

Rags's picture

Anytime she spends time with the kid my bride shakes her head and does a face/palm. She will then call me and start giving me shit about "He sounds just like you... he says the same things you say about stupid people.... life is so obvious to you and the kid......etc...."

That's my boy!!! }:)

Your kids will turn out just like you. Though we all fight it tooth and nail in our teens, most of us do end up sounding just like our parents.

Your kids are lucky they won the parent lottery. They will be fine.

I feel sorry for the kids who lost that lottery. Fortunately some of them get a second chance with awesome SParents. Wink Dirol Blum 3 }:)

Some times is feels so good to be an asshole. Wink

Fortunately it is not too difficult to tell a good asshole from a true asshole. Only idiots think a good asshole is an asshole. Normal people clearly can identify a true asshole.

CantKeepDoingThis's picture

I have to keep an eye on HHB's social media to prepare myself for bombshells. DH isn't always so forthcoming with information, so seeing what HHB is posting helps me position myself when DH tries to say we need to get X or Y extras for HHB. He tries to manipulate like her sometimes. He will wait until the last moment thinking I'll be backed against a wall and can't say no! "HHB needs dance shoes by tomorrow." "Nope, not in budget!" Big fight! If I have a heads up, I'll say something like, "Oh, I see HHB made guard. Letting you know now that there isn't money for extras! They need to use the child support you gave them for that stuff!" See, if DH isn't getting yelled at by BM and HHB that something isn't a crisis, it is easier for me to say no and not have a fight, and he is more likely to relay the message to them that the child support money is for this kind of stuff!

Moon, I have brought up locking the phone back down many times, but DH will not agree to it. I get about a billion excuses! In the conversation yesterday, I did mention that if HHB weren't on her phone all day at school, maybe her grades would be better. DH tried to blame HHB's grades on moving twice...once from our house to BM's between semesters...during winter break...and once about half way through the 5th grading period because the house BM was in got sold out from under them, and they had to find someplace else to rent. I told DH that was b.s., and reminded him that while living with is, HHB was not doing her work...lots of 0's...and then was scurrying to turn in 4-5 week late work at the end of grading periods to bring her grades to passing! I pointed out last school year was the same problem...stayed at same school whole year...and the only reason she got her credits was because I was on his ass to be on her ass! That's when he made the comment that it was no longer his problem!

I'm seriously hoping they take color guard away from her to make up her credits!!! They have 7 class periods...she has English, math, science, and social studies for the junior year. She is also required to complete her communications and health credits her junior year. The latter two are both half credits. Depending how the have her make up geometry and chemistry (assuming computer...these days it's easier on teachers that way), she is quickly running out of room on her schedule!

CantKeepDoingThis's picture

Yup...that was my response when she lived with us!

HHB: "I NEED shorts!"
Me: "Really? Seems you just got some at the end of last summer that you hardly wore. Go do laundry and clean your room, I bet you will find shorts!"

Oh wait, those weren't tight or short enough because when we bought her shorts last, we bought her the correct size...not the size she thought she was!

On the clothes stuff, DH tried to say that HHB needed clothing, and they were too broke to buy her any. Girl got a new dress and shoes for prom! I'm guessing that ate up most of the the child support. But yeah, it is about that time that HHB starts asking for new shorts. Girl thinks she needs new clothing every season...I mean, you simply CAN'T wear last season's clothes! When she left in December, HHB took two laundry baskets full of clothing with her. When she stopped in not too long ago, she took another BIG box of clothing with her. And by big box, I mean a box the size that you could fit an old-school TV in...not a flat screen, but a large box TV! And there are STILL clothes in the room here! I have half a mind to tell DH, "Oh, she still needs clothes? Maybe you should box up the remaining clothing here, and take it to her! She should be good then."

Oh, and if the clothes are getting too "small"? Cut back on the junk food, dear! When you eat yourself from a size 6 to a size 10, you probably need to start thinking about a job to buy those clothes! Or, just buy things with stretchy waists and enough room to grow!

And when I pointed out to DH that HHB has expensive taste, and that there are clothes on the bottom of her closet here that still has the tag on them that we bought when she claimed she NEEDED clothing, he tried to blame THAT on me and BD24! Seriously? "Well, she gets it from you and BD24. You are always wearing nice things!" I reminded him that both BD24 and I shop off of clearance racks and consignment, and when I tried to convince HHB of that, she would have no part of it! Clearance meant that it wasn't what everyone else was wearing...last season stuff that is going out. And consignment? Yeah, again last season or older AND it is not brand new stuff! She has to have brand new stuff!

CantKeepDoingThis's picture

Exactly! Girl only wants clothing from HotTopic, Zumies, and PacSun. Those places are not cheap! Shoes? They have to be Vans, Toms, or Sperrys...and she never wears socks! Yeah...her feet stink to high heaven, and within 2 weeks her shoes are ruined with the nasty foot smell!

BD24 and I go to American Eagle...mostly for jeans. We are shaped the same, and found a cut of jeans there that fits better than any others we have tried. But also keep in mind, we wear our jeans until they are basically dead...meaning they start wearing thin in bad places. If they develop holes in places other than the butt or crotch, no big deal...holes are in anyway, right? So we buy 2-3 pair of jeans maybe every 2-3 years? And shorts? We wear season, after season, after season. We both wear jean shorts, so those are always pretty much in.

I love shopping consignment...never know what you will find. I love some of the Free People stuff, but they are so freakin' expensive! Consigned, I have 2 Free People dresses in my closet that I got for about $20 each...they were each over $100 brand new. The trick is to hit up the consignment shops and thrift stores in the "richer" parts of town. Those folks buy more clothing than they will ever wear, and clean out their closet every season! You can find all kinds of stuff for like only 20% or less of the original cost...with tags still on them, even!!! I always get complements about how fashionable I am. Little do they know I spent the same thing they did at Wal-Mart or Target to look like I do. They all think I spend a ton of money on clothing.

LOL, I still have a couple of items in my closet from high school. I know...pretty sad. But it is funny, they are coming back! I still have my old denim jacket from high school...and yes, there is black Members Only jacket in there, too. Comes in handy for those 80's parties. Smile