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Was thinking today...

CantKeepDoingThis's picture

Remember that band and guard camp/program that HHB wanted to try to get into for this summer? The one that cost $3000...but that was IF you made it after paying $150 just to try out? Yeah...that one! I was thinking this morning on my drive to the grocery store that I'm so glad I shut DH down on that one! Would have been a waste of money! Of course, I didn't ever think she would make it...but on the off chance she had. I know not to even mention it again to DH, because he will try to say things would have turned out different if HHB had made camp. No it wouldn't! She would have still snuck out and got popped by cops for curfew! She would have still ended up back at BM's. The color guard drama would have been worse as HHB would have been all uppity about it! Her grades would still suck! And she probably would have ended up not going, wasting the money, because of all the stuff! So glad I shut that thing down!

Phone records now have me wondering if she is meeting people online again! A new number showed up this week...Iowa area code. Constant texting to and from this number every day starting around 9 pm and not ending until 6 am!!!

CantKeepDoingThis's picture

Who knows if BM knows about the all-night texting activities. BM doesn't pay much attention. Supposedly, that is what HHB's now ex-girlfriend called CPS claiming...that BM doesn't pay any attention to HHB's little half-brother. Haven't heard any updates on that, and still praying that CPS doesn't try to force us to take HHB! I've said it before, I will divorce before she is ever allowed back in this house!

I've thought about blocking the number, but not my problem! Sure, HHB is on our cell plan, but not my responsibility to police phone usage! I mainly monitor for stuff that could end up costing making sure there are no international numbers. You never know with these girls and Internet these days!

And you are right...not much of a future for the girl! Up all night, sleep all day is her preferred life! Work? Really?! She is 16 with tons of potential jobs within 5 miles from home. Nope. Oh, she babysits her cousin...does that count? The fact her uncle trusts his baby to be in that house during the day is scary as hell! Oh, yeah...I've always been to he's got a few screws loose!

CantKeepDoingThis's picture

It's called picking your battles. Cutting off HHB's phone would cause a HUGE fight with DH! Even locking it down...she would cry "dadddddeeeee" and since he has his own login to the account, he would go unlock everything. DH insists that HHB needs a phone so he can call/text BM never answers her phone, and they don't have a house phone. Granted, HHB rarely responds to DH's texts or answers his calls! When he gets tired of it, he sends her a text that if she doesn't call ASAP, he will cut her phone off. She then responds immediately, and is good about answering for about 2 weeks. Then, back to no response or answer.

I have her out of my house, and she doesn't come to visit. I take those wins. I'll pick up this battle when the child support ends in 22 payments! Yes, I'm counting them down!!! Girl is on my insurance because DH has to provide, and his is crap! It's cheaper deductible-wise to have her on my plan, since BM will take HHB to the ER for a sniffle!!! Once those child support payments end, I contact my HR and drop the girl! Then, I drop her from the phone plan!!! At this rate, girl isn't going to college, so her gravy train ends the day of high school graduation! Unless, she quits school before then...which would mean only 20 more payments!

Calypso1977's picture

kids can stay on their parents plan until age 26. doesnt mean you have to keep them on, but you can. i expect BM and even your husband wont want their darling to go without health insurance. you may be stuck with her longer than you think/want. Sad

WalkOnBy's picture

BUT, and I don't know what state OP is in, once a kid is no longer a minor and therefore no longer subject to the Courts, the obligation to keep HHB insured goes away Smile

Sure, neither parent may want her to go without coverage, but if the BM wants to make sure her baaaabeeee has insurance, I guess she could get her her own policy or put HHB on hers }:)

CantKeepDoingThis's picture

Exactly! The courts will not REQUIRE that insurance is maintained. DH can throw a fit about his darling not having insurance if he wants to. It isn't like there aren't options out there for her now. I will not continue to pay a dime for that girl! As many know already, DH doesn't even make enough to cover his bills, child support, and his half of the household expenses. I've been covering him for quite some time as I make more than he does, AND I have less in personal bills (for example, his car payment is $200/month more than mine). This means that I'm essentially paying for HHB's health insurance to keep his butt out of trouble with the courts! Once his obligation is over (as there is no mention of college in the court order, and it is highly unlikely that the girl will go anyway), I'm cutting off the insurance! I refuse to enable her! She can get a job and sign up for Medicaid or Obamacare!

BD24 graduated from high school before the new policies went into place. Because of that, she was promptly dropped by my insurance when I couldn't show that she was a student. She got off of her butt and found a job that provided insurnace! There are many, many hourly jobs out there that do, especially retail! Seeing as I'm certain HHB will never launch, and will be living with BM for a while (because she will not be allowed back in this house...I'll divorce first), she won't have to worry about rent or anything, and can work so that she can have the rest of us.

CantKeepDoingThis's picture

Some recent posts on Instagram have been made that lead me to believe I may be right about the reason that HHB isn't doing color guard any longer. My theory has been that the girls at her current school know about the drama HHB caused at her old school while in color guard because they are friends with those girls. It isn't like HHB to quit something that puts her "center stage", so to I figured something had to be up! My theory has been that she CAN'T do guard, and she doesn't want to tell dear daddy that. Be it because BM and/or SF will not allow her to do it because of her grades, the school won't let her do it because she is behind in credits, or that she was turned down because they found out about all the prior drama, there is a reason that HHB simply can't do color guard. Instead of fessing up to it, HHB will let DH believe that not doing color guard is her decision...which of course is going to leave him pushing for her to be in it (because we all know how DH loves watching his darling perform)!

Many recent posts on Instagram (which DH doesn't follow, and I can see due to a fake account I created some time ago that HHB accepted as a follower), HHB is talking about being a "guard reject". This is leading me to believe that she was shut down by the color guard because of her previous drama catching up with her! Wonder if KARMA is finally catching up with her!