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I don't know what to think!

Timetogiveup's picture

I’m almost afraid to ask this because I noticed in the past 24 hours there has been some people in here reaming us new ones.
My SS (16, will be 17 in Jan) did something either strange or spiteful this weekend.

We were up at our cabin, he was eating breakfast and asked if I just cleaned the bedroom I said yes. He excused himself and ran into the bedroom, passing the bathroom in the hallway. He NEVER uses this one. I was cleaning that hallway bathroom and when I got done he asked if I cleaned it, I said yeah. He locked himself in there. This is the one he always uses, so I didn’t think much about it. I went downstairs and cleaned that bathroom. I HATE cleaning bathroom! He asked the same thing and ran downstairs. I went for a walk and when I came back I went into the downstairs bathroom, I almost died. There was diarrhea all over the place, on the seat, the floor, and the sides of the toilet. I went to use the hall bathroom and the toilet was in the same condition. Guess what….the master bath was the same!!!!

I asked DH if he had a stomach problem he said no but SS did. But this time I freaking out, I showed DH the piles on the seat and DH well, just clean it the kid is sick!!! WTF???? I said no…he is gonna clean up. He did AFTER he knew I cleaned the bathroom!!! Why????
DH said he couldn’t clean it up because I didn’t give him a warning, so DH clean it. SS was watching with that smug smirk on his face. We all have stomach issues from time to time…..BUT to do this?????

Bface's picture

Well, this young man has problems, don't you think? It sounds like the behavior of a toddler with a vengence! I know the problems with a DH who can't accept that son has serious problems. We have one home from organic farm to visit, but I think it's more than that. I think he was asked to leave and I think he's just trying to figure out his next move. He hasn't done anything like what you describe, but he has cracked open an ink pen (around age 18) and spread it all over BF's living room. Also broke a lot of small electronics. I don't want him living here, as he is a grown man now (24), I am not his mother and I shouldn't have to be fearful in my own home. Good luck with this one, try and talk to DH about getting him help now, or he could be a burden your entire life.

Timetogiveup's picture

He THOUGHT it was my job but he ended cleaning it and the brat followed him around standing in the doorways smirling.

I don't allow the boy to have pens in this house.....he did the broken pen thing two years ago....but he spread it all over himself. Thankfully.

I'm just besides myself. There is something sooooo very wrong with is kid. We think its Aspergers (we being me and my expert friends and his therapist) but DH refuses to label the kid. Righ tnow I just assume I am dealing with a normal child that is extremely weird. I just don't know how much more I can take. On a good day I have a difficult time with the boy.

momoutofhermind2's picture

DH is in denial. I would've confronted SS in front of DH so he can see his smirk and watch him lie.

You wanna get back at him and this is going to sound really gross, but save a weeks worth of tampons/pads and stick them in his room somewhere that he can't find them, but where it would stink. Leave them there for a bit as long as it's in a place they wont stink up your whole house, maybe the closet.. hehehe.

Or I would give him some exlax in his milk so he could go to the bathroom a handful more times and this time you get to watch him clean it up and smile.

I would NOT let him sit there with that smart look on his face. Kids only learn when you pay them back especially teenagers.

Orange County Ca's picture

I'm glad you didn't clean it up. This kid is whako although I obviously have no reason as to the cause.

It's up to you and I don't think anyone here would fault you for leaving. In my opinion there is a good chance this kid may never permanently leave home and in any event will always be causing problems for Dad and by extension you if you're still around.

A three bathroom "cabin"? Perhaps you can tell Dad that if he wants you to stick around the kid will live in the city home and you'll live there and Dad can come back and forth as needed.

Tx mommy of 3's picture

Well my ds3 liked to put tons of toilet paper in the toilet. Once he put so much after pooing and thought it was funny. It was gross. So input the rubber gloves on HIM and made him take all the toilet paper out and put it in the trash. He was grosses out too. But hasn't done it since. My son was 3 and cleaned it. I would've made your ss clean it- sick or not. It was a sick prank he could tell his friends about. He probably even took a laxative beforehand and had it all planned out. Dh fell for it. Oh well, he's the one who cleaned it. Maybe next time dh will wise up.

mom2five's picture

You said: Right now I just assume I am dealing with a normal child that is extremely weird.

What you are dealing with sounds like mental illness. Normal teenagers are weird. Normal teenagers do not get fecal material all over three bathrooms.

My family had a stomach flu last year. All five kids and my DH had it. I didn't, thank goodness. They had constant diarrhea. I cleaned toilets and bathroom floors all day every day for almost a week. Even with six people with violent vomiting and diarrhea, the bathrooms were never that bad. It was gross, but not poop all over everything gross. It was contained (mostly) to the inside of the toilet. And even as sick as they were, they felt bad about it. They apologized constantly.