No-call, no-show BM
I guess I've got a lot to bitch about from this last weekend's visitation with the stepkids (see my other post from yesterday lol), but I'm pretty much over that now. Husband and I talked, apologies were made, understanding was given.
To put the icing on the cake though, mom was supposed to come pick kids up around 6:30 Sunday evening. She doesn't usually offer to come get them--typically they try to work out a meet halfway type of arrangement. I should know by now though. Any offers she does make of coming to pick up usually have about a 50/50 rate of whether she follows through or not. We live about an hour and a half from each other. My husband, on the other hand, has driven the full distance many times.
So 6:30 comes and goes. No word from her. Not responding to texts. And I'm like is she ok? Because certainly who does this? Finally an hour later she texts my husband back to say she's drinking at a bbq. Completely in the opposite direction of home. Farther from her home than we even are.
Did your eyes also just nearly pop out of their sockets?
Maybe they didn't. I know many of you are not strangers to the heinous acts of toxic BMs around here. But still.
This is not the only instance of something like this, but this blatant disregard for her kids seems to be coming more frequently, in favor of her newest boyfriend these days. I have typically always seen her as someone who cares about her kids, even if she is severely misguided at times. The more this stuff keeps happening though, I see otherwise.
So anyways, she wants them to stay with us longer and my husband is like no. He has to work in the morning and I'm really sick. She knew today was her day to pick up the kids. Priorities, lady. So my husband, at 8pm, begins driving the kids home. They all live with their uncle right now since their house burned down (which is another story entirely that would make your eyes bug out too). Uncle is a great, generous person. But even he was like WTF. My husband didn't get home until late, with work early in the morning.
I can put her being a piece of shit aside a lot of the time, especially since I started practicing disengaging with the kids in the healthiest ways I can come up with. But sometimes her being a piece of shit leaks over into my life and it makes me angry all over again, knowing the ways her children are messed up on account of how she's lived her life. And she wasn't even always like this, but she changes herself to cater to each new man she starts seeing. Example: she hated video games and used them to bait her son all the time, but now her new bf is a gamer, so obvi she is too and she looooves video games. *insert eyeroll here*
IDK about you, but I don't find that behavior attractive in a partner, but who am I to say I guess?
I'll pick myself up and get back at this disengaging thing again by the next weekend. I just had to get this out somewhere.