Alright so I know this isn’t really a step child issue but I have no friends to talk to about this and can’t find a site to talk about marriage on. So here we go.
My husband and I have been together not even 8 months and I am so ready to leave. We only dated a year before we got married and it was a dumb choice on my part. We got pregnant 3 months into our relationship so I guess a part of me thought marrying this guy was the right decision for me and my son. I regret not putting more thought into it. My husband works full time Monday - Friday and I’m a stay at home mom with my 8 month old and step son three days a week and nanny twice a week. I only get my step son three days a week so I am usually only taking care of my baby. My husband doesn’t help with my baby. When his son is here he focuses solely on him and doesn’t bother to help with our son. We get his son every other weekend and a couple days throughout the week. The weekends we don’t have his son he spends being lazy lounging around the house, not waking up until 2 pm etc. he never wants to do anything the weekends we don’t have his son and it’s so shitty those are our weekends to spend time together and he spends it sleepin. Saturday he woke up at 10 am and went back to sleep at 1 pm and literally I kid you not slept until 10 am the next morning. While I have to feed change entertain bathe our son. I love taking care of our son I do. I am a stay at home mom so I understand a lot of the responsibilities of taking care of him should be put on me but I rarely ever get a break and I should. I went to the grocery store by myself for the first time Friday since God knows when. It was amazing. Lol. I can’t remembwr The last time I got to do something for me. I’m on mom duty 24/7. I use to ask him to help me with our son. I would ask him to feed him breakfast and he would say “he doesn’t need breakfast I’ll just give him a bottle” yes he does need breakfast!!! He’s a growing child and needs the nutrients! Not only that but that’s been the routine and I don’t want him to get off track. I’ll ask him to bathe him and he says “we don’t need to bathe him tonight. He doesn’t need a bath every night” once again, yes he doesn’t because that’s been the routine his entire little life and I’m not going to switch it up now. I’ll ask him to get up with him sometimes in the night and he will just roll over and ignore me so I end up having to do it. The only way he ever helps me with our son is when we’re arohnd family or friends. It’s so fake. Out of nowhere he will begin asking me if I need him to do a, b, and c and it really throws me off. Like why can’t you do this just around me and not just around ppl to make yourself look like a good husband? I’ve gotten to the point where I don’t ask him for help anymore because I know it’s not going to get done and if it does, it’s gonna be half assed and I’m going to have to hold his hand through it. Or he will just refuse to do it and it infuriates me. We went to dinner the other night and got home at 7 and he told me to get the car seat out of the car and he ran inside and got into bed while I had to get his diaper bag, and baby out of the car. Then I had to put him to bed feed him dinner and bathe him while my husband just sleeps. I’m upset I don’t know why my husband is acting like this man child. This isn’t the fifties anymore it isn’t my duty to do everything for the kids and I’m getting fed up. He’s not a gentleman, he’s super selfish and I’m over it. Everywhere we go I have to drive, I have to carry the baby in the carrier, I have to feed the baby and I’m getting super fed up. He needs to start acting like a father. I really want to leave because I try talking to him about this and he just yells at me. He doesn’t care. I’m scared to leave because I cry at the idea of having my son only 50 percent of the time. He is everything to me and I can’t imagine a life where I only seeing him 50%. Help. I don’t know what to do. Is he being awful or am I just asking too much?