She may not understand that many times the insurance companies do not issue separate id's with the dependent's names. Perhaps, she would like to see something that shows her that they are indeed being covered under the policy? Maybe a printout from the online website?

I believe that even if the kids are covered under her DH's policy, that policy will ask whether there is another insurance company that ALSO covers them. I know my company asks that.

RE the dental and eye. She may have assumed that medical included dental and eye. Her DH policy may not have great coverage.

In the end... this is really stuff you don't need to get in the middle of with her. Also you don't need to assume a lot of "back story" in what she is asking for. She asks DH for the cards. You tell him your company doesn't provide dependent cards and that the one with your name is the only one. If she has misplaced that..or needs a new one, you can give him one to provide to her.

I say this because you get overly frustrated about the most minor request from her. Tell your DH to stop stoking your anger and deal with her requests himself.

SS is covered under my policy.

My name is on the cards, and I'm not giving one to BM.

I have a very long french hyphenated name - she only knows me by my anglicized nickname - BM's not getting a card, so that she can know my full name..I don't thiiiiink so. I don't even think BM knows SS is covered under my plan in any case.

The info can be given directly to the doctors office. BM tried desperately to have DH call the insurance company and give permission for them to speak to her about his policy. Uh, no. My children and I are also on his insurance. If she has an issue she can contact DH about HIS insurance. For dental, DH contacted the doctor where they are established and gave the new insurance info with a threat if they give his info out to the cow. The kids have received services without issues, the psycho doesn't even have an insurance card for them.