DH doesn't engage BM
DH went to one of YSD17's events the other night. BM walked by and they had a very brief hello. He told me he thought about asking BM about OSDalmost20 (PAS'ed fully for about 5 years now), but decided NOT to because "why engage the enemy?"
My jaw dropped! He finally sees BM as the biggest issue with OSD! He told me that he knows I was telling him to not trust her and stop thinking that "...but she's a good mom..." He also told me some other stories about her he's never told me, and regrets allowing her so much space. He also didn't go on and on about 'resolving' his relationship with OSD.
Good for him. He could also talk about OSD briefly without getting too upset. So even though BM and OSD were part of our convo, it didn't ruin our fun night. I think his therapy is working, so those of you going through the ramifications of full PAS, sticking with it, listening, and counseling is essential and hopefully time will help.