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Who makes kids buy tux jackets!?!?

lieutenant_dad's picture

So, OSS's concert band requires the boys to wear tuxes during performances. All eleven performances.

Problem: the school is no longer providing tux rentals for this shiz.

Their solution: make the parents buy or rent tuxes. They are allowing the boys to wear just black slacks and a white button-up shirt, though, to save on costs.

Why in the BLOODY HADES does the school think this is a good idea?! The girls get to wear an all-black, floor-length dress that I can get on Amazon for $30 (because I own one very similar). Yet, the boys have to drop a few hundred on a jacket, cumberbund, and bow tie?!

Of course, BM isn't paying a cent of this. She also couldn't be bothered to get YSS a cell phone despite us carrying OSS. She *also* hinted to DH about him needing to pay for senior pictures (which he, OSS, and I all think are stupid for what you get). 

I swear, if it isn't BM taking our money, then it's the school. I'm so tired of them wanting to do all these "cool" and "nice" things that aren't in the budgets of the majority of the parents in the school system but are a requirement for a kid to participate when it's totally unnecessary!

I feel for the teachers at the school who are surviving on shoe string budgets, but man, this shiz is getting ridiculous.


advice.only2's picture

You can actually find that stuff on Amazon pretty cheap, I bought my son a tuxedo (jackes, pants and dress shirt) with cumberbund and bowtie for 100.00 when he attended his junior prom, nice thing is he now has a tux if he needs one.

lieutenant_dad's picture

It's not the money by itself. Band is expensive. The instrument, the upkeep, lessons, summer bands, etc. All pricey, but all part of being a good musician. 

My issue is more from the fact that a tux isn't needed. His jazz band wears a black shirt and black dress pants, and they look snazzy. Heck, buy the boys a white or red bow tie and they are downright adorable. It's not a necessity; it's a superfluous expense that doesn't make them better musicians or win them any competitions.

Plus, the lower-level bands don't require a tux uniform. They just do button-ups (freshmen do a polo), so there is clearly a cheaper option.

I'd also likely be less annoyed if it weren't his senior year and know he'll never wear that tux again after May 2020. *sigh*

fourbrats's picture

choir does this. Except we also had to buy a particular black dress from a particular store at $270 dollars. And she isn't even doing choir this year because her schedule doesn't allow it. The boys had to buy tuxes at about the same cost. The girls also had to have $80 worth of accessories. The whole thing was ridiculous and we donated the dress so that someone else can save on the cost. 

Oh and alterations. The joys of having a tiny tiny child. She is under five feet at almost 18 and we spent another $100 having the dress altered. I did have it done in such a way that the next kid can easily pull or adjust the hem though. 

It's the first day of school and I am already out close to $300 for the two teens still at home just for school fees despite no choir this year. ASB, technology fees, uniform fees for the 17 year olds technical program, lunch accounts, and gym fees. I am dying over here lol! 

Letti.R's picture

It is insane to request that they wear a tux.
I understand that they may want the kids to be formally dressed,  but a tux?

Most people don't even know HOW to wear a tux, never mind what goes with it: including cuff links and type of shoes or if the trousers needs one or two stripes or if the lapel is required to be peak, shawl or notched....
School is being rather pretentious and clearly indicating they have no idea of actual etiquette. of very formal attire. 

lieutenant_dad's picture

Now take all tha information and filter it through the brain of a 17 year old boy. He has no idea, and I can't blame him!

Letti.R's picture

LT, the cost alone makes this request insane IMO.
Nevermind knowing how to properly wear the right tux jacket or trouser...
I think it is completely irresponsible of the school to expect parents / guardians of kids to fork out this kind of money when they don't even know rules around very formal dress.
In  this day and age, who does?
All completely unnecessary.

But dressing incorrectly in very formal men's wear, shows who are 'dressed up barbarians' or 'slumming aristocrats'...
Those who know, see and know - and those who don't, don't.

Dontfeedthetrolls's picture

This is actally very common now. Schools are getting less and less funding and art programs are feeling the pain of it. If enough parents go and complain they might adjust the requirements. Personally I think a nice button up shirt of matching colors should be a good enough option.

Thumper's picture

Well someone is living high on the hog. The money is going somewhere. All the States Lotto money for Education..where the heck is that going too.

WE NEED the Arts programs and less on sports. SORRY sports fans. JMO

Trying to Stepmom's picture

We didn’t do this when I was in school. We just did white tops and black dress bottoms. 

The high school orchestra near me started having the kids buy their tuxes and dresses a few years ago. It’s much better than the old rentals the school owned. Especially for the ladies ( can we say puffy shoulders?). If a student or their parents has trouble paying for it, I think they can still rent one from the school. 

The director doesn’t make it required but the students are responsible for having some kind of appropriate concert attire. And most of the ladies that don’t buy it end up changing their minds once they see everyone trying on their new formals once they arrive. 

I kind of wish I would have had that option in high school. I would have worn that dress for so many things!

ESMOD's picture

I wish that schools would be more mindful of the fact that teens are expensive enough already without the added burden of stupid extra expenses like this...  And.. even if they do provide some assistance to the kids with low incomes.. there are a lot of families in the "mid-income" range that feel a pinch too.. Especially families where there may be a dad paying child support.. multiple kids driving.. saving for college because you won't get the scholarships and grants that the low income kids can get etc... 

It can really become a barrier for kids to participate. 

Thumper's picture

OP I would bet ya, that there is a large percentage of parents who are pretty upset about this tux thing.

A few calls to the Main office by parents might change this dress code quickly. One white shirt AND One Black button down shirt with 1pair of black slacks should be all the parents need to buy. They could change them out.