Just one of those things that annoys me.
Do any of you have to deal with a Skid that wants daddy to be with them the minute you walk in the door?
SD is like this. As soon as I walk in the door from work it's, "daddy will you sit with me after dinner."
Last night after I got home from work DH was making dinner and SD was all happy because apparently we were going to eat at the table with the kids. (There's not enough chairs at the table unless we bring one out from the closet in our bedroom but without putting the additional leaf in the table there's still not enough room for everyone.) She asked DH if he would sit in between her and her little brother. Now DH and I have talked about this before because he was constantly doing this and many other things and we both agreed that he would sit next to me. (Believe me the kids get to sit with him all of the time while I either sit with my BD or by myself.The first time he actually sat next to me at the table she scooted her chair over right next to him and then proceeded to try and climb into his lap throughout the entire dinner while staring at me the entire time.) So DH told her no that he was going to sit with his wife. This obviously didn't sit well with SD so she replied with, "you sit with Unhappy all of the time." I was tiered of listening to it so I told her that he doesn't sit with me all of the time and that we would be eating dinner together. Her response was, "at night you sit together."
I understand that she's 7 but geeze. Really?? So in her mind daddy should spend her every waking miunte with her and her brother and I have to wait until after they are in bed before I get any time with them. I don't ever remember having that logic when I was a child and I had a SM.
Can anyone explain this to me. How does a kid get to thinking this way?
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My SD11 does this all the
My SD11 does this all the time. I've been with her dad since she was 6 and over the years she's gotten more and more needy. She wants to be on her dad all the time, sitting in his lap while he's watching tv, (she's very much over weight) laying in our bed with him, sitting by him at dinner, holding his hand every where we go, it's ridiculous! He just recently started telling her to get off of him when she tries to sit on his lap or that he's going to sit next to me when we go out to eat or at home. She just does something else to get his attention. He still doesn't stop her from laying in bed with him which REALLY bothers me but when I brought it to his attention he just tells me that they are an affectionate family and just because I didn't come from one doesn't mean it's wrong of him to cuddle with his daughter. I think it's sick, there is a certain age that it's not appropriate anymore. She wanted him to pick her up when she was 7! Sorry to tell you but in my experience it just got worse. I think DH is the one that's going to have to shut this behavior off and he may have to be very stern about it. We will see if my DH will eventually tell his jealous daughter to get the hell out of our bed!
Wait a minute- she sleeps
Wait a minute- she sleeps with him?
Sometimes, he works night so
Sometimes, he works night so he's going to bed when I'm leaving for work. I've caught her sneaking into our room when she thinks I've left already. I went up and told her to get out of our bedroom and she was pissed. Typically when I'm there she doesn't try to sleep with us but she will try to stay in our bed cuddled up to her daddy for as long as she can. Right in between us of course. She's fucking 11 not 2.
OH HELL NO! I'd march her
OH HELL NO! I'd march her ass right back into her room! holy hell. these kids are so fucking manipulative!
SD14 would sleep with her dad before I came along, even at age 12. I found it disgusting, he thought it was because she was trying to adjust to the divorce. That all stopped when he and I got serious and boy SD hated me ever since!
I just don't get the whole "gotta sleep with daddy" thing. I never wanted to sleep in my parent's room!
It's not the ned of the world
It's not the ned of the world and it's not like she is being needy. She wants his attention if I'm around. It just annoys me. She's constantly trying to show me where her place is and where mine is. She's just insecure.
After literally years of me
After literally years of me "explaining" these things to DH, he finally started shutting SD's annoying behaviour down about 1-2 years ago. However, she is still SO needy at almost 13! It is definitely worse with her BM but she clings onto me, her dad, her grandparents, my mom, anyone who will give her the teeniest bit of attention! We have talked to her about it so many times and it never makes a difference. Our next step is psychological assessment. Her mom can't even leave the house without a guilt trip. That's just not normal.
Same here and SD14 is STILL
Same here and SD14 is STILL like this...
My SD9 does the same thing -
My SD9 does the same thing - wants all his attention when I am home. Its really obvious when its just the two of them at home and I walk in, she is all over him quickly. If I'm home first, she tries to make sure we aren't together at all until bedtime, and even then we have had challenges because she wants him to stay in her room and sit with her. I personally think its disgusting, and I have made no secret to him that she is trying to compete and I am not falling for that game. He refuses to lay in her bed, and she is not allowed in our room ever, so I dont have to deal with that. I dont know if its their age, because the are girls or the fact they come from divorced parents. Although, I NEVER was like that with my dad and my parent divorced when I was young. But then again, society wasnt' overly focused on putting kids on pedastools as they are now days.
The world has become way too
The world has become way too "child-centric" these days...
Agreed. I refer to SD as the
Agreed. I refer to SD as the mini wife. She even flat out told DH a couple of weekends ago when DH told her that he was going to spend time with his wife, "but I'm your wife." Hopefully things will change. I may just start booting her out of his lap and say it husband and wife time. You know it's okay that DH and I spend at the very least 5 minutes together with the kids awake. We can't even go out into the garage with out them knock knock knocking. DH is working on that one. He's flat out told them that they will get in trouble if they don't leave us alone.
Thats a start. Just be
Thats a start. Just be consistent and if DH backs you as well, even better. Hopefully she'll get it. I'm praying they outgrow this in their teens.
So far, my SD14 tried to act
So far, my SD14 tried to act the same but DH won't allow it. I don't know if she'll EVER outgrow it!
We'll see DH is deffinitely
We'll see DH is deffinitely making an effort. Sometimes I think that his kids do things intentionally like hurt each other just to get his attention. It always seems to happen when we have excaped to the garage or are still sleeping on a Saturday and Sunday morning. And you can't tell them to only knock unless it's an emergency because then everything becomes and emergency.