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Don't ask me for advice anymore DH...

tankh21's picture

So the skids finally left on Friday 6/30 and BM was supposed to pick them up at 6 pm however she texted DH that she would be an hour early picking them up and DH told her no he doesn't get home until 5:30 pm so of course they start arguing because she throws the well I let you pick them up crap 10 minutes early when you come pick them up and the CO states that you pick them up at 6:00 pm not any minute before. So once again this is a throw crap in your face pissing contest between them. I told DH you will never learn will you? I said instead of arguing with BM why couldn't you just have said the real reason why you wanted her to pick them up at 6:00 pm instead of calling her self righteous. Then again he really doesn't have to give her a specific reason why. DH just wanted to be able to say goodbye to his kids and give them a hug before they left but he didn't tell BM that he just argued with her and called her self righteous because she couldn't come at 6:00 pm. I told him that him picking up the skids at her house early was going to bite him in the ass because that is not following the CO and that she would put it in her pocket for later to use against him and she did just that!! I told him to stop asking me for advice when it comes to dealing with her because I am not giving it anymore since he doesn't want to follow it or continue to argue with a dumb***!!

Comments

tankh21's picture

Yeah that is what she said and was trying to tell him. I think 10 minutes is way different from an hour however, she did have a point about following the CO though because DH is always throwing that in her face that he is just following the CO so that is why she was made the comment to him. Like I said it's a pissing contest between these two and it is totally asinine.

Maxwell09's picture

"no" is a one word sentence and the only one he should have replied with. Sometimes two people are too emeshed with each other. The opposite of love is indifference, not hate. Maybe you should remind him of that.

tankh21's picture

I can't help but think that there is some feelings still there between those two. DH denies it but, I tell him if you don't care then why do you argue with her?

Ninji's picture

When I first got with my DH, he and BM were always fighting like cats and dogs but were also ALWAYS on the phone with each other. It was crazy making.

FF seven years and I can't get him to send her a simple text about SD and back to school stuff.

How long has it been since your DH and BM split?

Maxwell09's picture

To be fair it could be out of habit. BM and DH were together for six years so naturally the way they talked to each other-the constant bickering and hateful talk towards each other, was a by-product of their relationship. They spent six years arguing and trying to be the right one. I told DH that him responding to BM with counter arguments and just bickering over things that aren't necessary is just fostering that same relationship he supposedly ended. I told him he doesn't have to justify himself to her anymore, he doesn't have to risk losing his job to text back to her argument while he's on the clock. Putting it in perspective for him made him completely change the way he looked at communication with BM. It was like he realized he didn't have to keep fighting her to be heard because once he got the CO he had all he needed when dealing with her with most things.

tankh21's picture

Yes you are right Maxwell09 it could be out of habit. I just don't like when he asks me for advice and then doesn't want to follow it so I flat out told him not to ask me to advice when it comes to BM anymore.