Sweet T, you are seeing what he want you to see. He is soon to be your ex- you shouldn't waste your time with what he is doing. Put him out of your mind. You know who he is and soon he won't be your problem.

You need to detach emotionally from him. Promise you, one day you won't care. Its starts with not keeping tabs on what he does. Its hard but you need to disconnect from him.

Imagine him to be the trash you are taking out... Someone will pick it up.

I can imagine this is hard, as many of us put up with so much shit before calling it quits. However, try to remember that he is still the same person you are divorcing. While it may seem like he is just enjoying life with the new friend, at the end of it all, not enough time has passed and he will do to her exactly what he did to you. In addition, she might dump him much quicker than you did or be even more miserable putting up with his shit. Be thankful you will now have your life back and don't look back.

My ex was an ahole many times to me, actually pretty abusive. He immediately dated after we divorced. It hit me a little when he did, not even because I loved him, but because I "felt" he was treating her so nicely while he treated me like shit. It didn't take me long to realize that eventually the same would happen to her. After that, I never resented him or her. I just moved on and wished them the best.

People do NOT change overnight. You know that. If he was an ahole to you and you had a stressful relationship, the same will happen again. Even if it doesn't be glad you are out of the mess. Hugs!

Ditto ditto ditto JingerVZ!! Your ex is an emotional infant who seeks instant gratification to distract him from the reality that his life is a train wreck. Don't "buy" what he's trying to "sell" the world!! He is NOT happy. He is NOT content. He is NOT living a full and peaceful life based on on grown up choices and loving, close relationships. You think you see that he is because he is selling that idea. But like any good con-man/salesman, what he's selling isn't all it's cracked up to be.

Ignore him when you can, keep your interactions brief and business like when you can't. And stop buying his BS, recognize him for the lost cause he is.

((((HUGS))))....Please try not to see everything at face value. You are only getting information that he is wanting you to see. And he is only trying to hurt you. Keep in mind, like others have said, people don't change over night and some don't change a all. Try to just focus on yourself. Be true to yourself, remain the good person you know you are and do what makes you happy.

One day you will be in my shoes, eating the popcorn and watching the show from a distance. Ever since last Friday phone has been blown up with emails, text messages and phone calls. All with people trying to tell me gossip about my estranged H and even an old ex boyfriend. Karma is definitely biting both of them right now. But you know what....all I said to anyone that tried to contact me is "not my problem anymore". That feels so wonderful!

This happened with me and my Ex-H. I was struggling in a shithole apartment with a car payment, daycare, bills bills bills, and a two year old. He was living it up and not paying child support either. I looked like a bag of microwaved shit from working full time and part time to cover everything and he was having the time of his life. He had cheated on me and I finally had enough and less than two months after we split she had a ring on her finger. I had been with him for 10 years!!!!!!! I was so hurt. And then she cheated on him and broke his heart. KARMA. However as I struggled through the years and he looked like he was having a blast, going to concerts, bars, women. Plus every time he got our daughter EOW they had so much fun and she would say I never take her to fun places like Dad does. Well Dad doesn't pay me child support and so I'm kind of struggling over here. But here we are 10 years later. Now, I worked my way up into a great career, have a big 4 bedroom house that is MINE only, a nice vehicle, and my daughter has everything she needs. Here is the part you are going to care about: He ran his way through his women and his good looks! He 47, working a manual job for $10/hour, living on his mama's couch in her old ass singlewide, driving a 17 year old raggedy ass car, and looks like SHIT! I was 100lbs overweight when he and I split. Now I'm very in shape and he has that old man fat belly and lots of gray hair BAHAHAHAHA

Your ex might be having fun now but it will run it's course I promise.

Oh and BTW it's been 10 years and at least once a month he calls me and begs me to "let him have his family back, he loves us". BAHAHAHAH NEGATIVE douchebag!

No judgements here! My ex left me, moved in with a 'friend' and promptly got her pregnant. While he portrayed a carefree life and it ripped me apart, it was all for show. He's now trapped with her, 2 kids and unhappy from what I've heard. While my current DH can make me crazy at times, I'm so much better off. You will be too.

Having been in your shoes I can tell you from personal experience that he is "living it up" just for a show and to see if he will get a reaction out of you. Like several others have said, it's all for show. He wants you to see his totally awesome new life with the new babe on his arm, the new car and so on and so forth. Why? To still try to control you. If he can get a reaction out of you then he has succeeded in "making you feel and do something" that will prove to him that he can still control you without even being in the same house.

My ex was and still to this day is an abusive excuse of a man. Up until 14 months ago he was even using our girls to try to control me and was controlling the girls through mental and physical abuse... until this mama found out. We have been divorced since 2003 and he has had so many girlfriends I lost count. He has even been engaged to 5 of them. Yea, it doesn't take long for them to see who he really is.

Hang in there. You are doing a great job. Don't let what he is or isn't doing bother you. The less it gets to you, the less control he has over you.

Sweet T here's what I did. . .

I made a list of every nasty and downright mean thing my ex ever did to me and I hung it on the fridge. I'd read it from time to time when these feelings came up (which are normal) and get mad all over again!!

A lot of men do this. They immediately set out to prove they are still "a catch". Women take the time to grieve and get over the relationship. By the time you are ready to move on, he will be just starting to grieve the relationship.