Can I please do the parenting for you EOW too???
Last night he sent me this email at 1 am last night. The overtime that he does on Thursday night has not gone away. ( he didn't want to use any overtime when calculating CS. BTW I am deathly allergic to all nuts so BS has grown up in a peanut free home for the most part. He has eaten peanut butter at daycare but has not wanted it in the last year or so.)
Would you please have a talk with BS prior to next weekend? He absolutely refuses to eat anything with nuts in it because he fears for your safety, even though I've told him that he'll brush his teeth before bed and in the morning as well as change his clothes and shower in the morning. I'll even keep and clean any clothing he may get oils on, just so you're safe. So please tell him that he can and should eat nuts when he's with me.
OMG, I am having so many behavioral issues with BS because of the divorce. I am afraid to come down too hard because Douche accused me of being abusive because I have yelled and swore one tome at BS when he was being awful and Daddykins was parked on the couch doing nothing as usual. The ass has even quized BS if mommy yells or is mean. I have way bigger issues with refusing to go to bed, mind, practice... what he needs is a good swat on the butt because nothing has worked otherwise BUT I can't. Now he wants me to tell our child to eat nuts.
I emailed back and said I can't make him do anything he doesn't want to and to be honest I don't think he likes nuts. I spoke to BS and told him that Daddy wanted me to talk to him about it and he just doesn't want to eat nuts. I told him just tell your dad that then.
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So please tell him that he
So please tell him that he can and should eat nuts when he's with me.
Why in the hell should BS eat nuts? Is there some magic to nuts that I don't know about? That's just stupid.
I think the only issue I
I think the only issue I would address is this: "BS, I'm so lucky to have a great son like you who worries about me when I'm not around. But it's ok to not worry so much about me. I'll be ok!! It's ok to eat nuts with your dad or anyone else, alright?" The end.
^^^^^^ this^^^^seriously is
^^^^^^ this^^^^seriously is that so hard to say. You told your ex that you can't make bs do something he doesn't want to do.?... I'm sorry sweet t but this is boloney and sounds more to me like aggressive parenting. Stop using bs as a pawn. That's all I'm going to say for now I'm so irritated by this....
Please tell me how I am being
Please tell me how I am being aggressive? How am I using him as a pawn? You irritated, you ought to try being me. Just because I am the BM doesn't make me the enemy. I was a damned good step mom for 9 years. My skids love me still. They watched their dad abuse me for years and think he is a tool and that he screwed up.
I am doing the best I can to protect my son and make sure he doesn't turn into an abuser while allowing him yo have a relationship with his dad.
I do think he wants to
I do think he wants to interact with me... I have seen it all these years with BM. I believe it is the familiarity of the relationship. He misses it.
I am all business with him. I needed to let him know that we went to the dentist on Wednesday anyways but had not wanted to open the door so this worked for me.
Funny thing with the nuts is SS14 told me that he eats them all the time now and he thinks his dad does it because he hates me. Hey the guy has said he wished I was dead so he could piss on my grave and dance a jig. A peanut butter sandwich would do it.
OMG he has emailed back and
OMG he has emailed back and is he chatty. He is going to try and get BS back into his music lessons, so I will give him that attempt at parenting.
Now he is all what am I doing this weekend. Too funny. He probably wants to tell me what he is doing, what person he wants to date. :sick:
I agree about the
I agree about the subconscious adversion. Additionally the school has become a huge nut free zone as well. I have actually built up a tolerance of being around peanut butter over the years. Everyone in my office eats peunut butter almost daily. Initially just the smell made me ill, I have to wonder how much of that is in my head and how much is real. Now I will tell you I could never eat the stuff, but I can be around it. Infact I myself have fed BS peanut butter because the allergist suggested I do that to make sure his tolerance remained. BUT he has always brushed his teeth and washed his hands after wards. It is a good source of protein.
I think this is just to have contact and control. Believe me I would have to eat the stuff to kill me, touching me would only make me break out.
I think he is just fishing.
I think he is just fishing. He asked what we were doing this weekend. I was pretty vague as it is non of his business...yet I do not want the crazy directed at me.
OK. He told me he was doing something fun this weekend but said “Mommy says it’s a surprise.” I didn’t think you’d be going to Back to the 50s at the Fairgrounds where I’m going with a bunch of guys from high school tomorrow (crowds, bees – not your bag).
I know the guys from highschool is a girl he dated in highschool that BM said he has been seeing.
Love it! Believe me I am
Love it! Believe me I am really happy without him.
This weekend my sister is in town and it's my brother's birthday and we are going to go up to the cabin to stay. I just like to keep it on the down low as we switched weekends at my suggestion because it is his nieces grad party and his parents are in town. He was trying to pull special occasion claus but was not w/in the dates required to ask and would have had to make up the time which was stupid.
I have been home more in the last 3 months than in the last 3 years. And I don't have to worry about if he is going to be an ass and ruin my time.
I see where you are coming
I see where you are coming from and trust me it would be really easy to PAS if a person wanted to. I told him daddy wanted me to talk with him because I want him to see that daddy and I are communicating.
Yesterday he told me that we couldn't call daddy from my cell phone because daddy could be arrested. I had an order of protection which I had lifted mainly for this reason. BS has to call him twice a week per the decree. I make sure it happens because it is in the decree and because I do think it is good for my son. BUT OMG he needed to tell him that. Well why not tell him that the reason it could happen is because daddy hit mommy and got arrested and plead guilty to domestic abuse.
I spend most of my time protecting BS from his dad's stupidity. I told him no need to worry about that stuff and that he was calling his dad on the cell because we were on our way to lessons.
With the nuts I told him that it is okay for him to eat them... heck I even bought him premade peanut butter sandwiches which he refused to eat the other day. This is what I mean when I say I can't make him eat it if he doesn't want to.