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In-laws/BM drama..

Stressedstepparent17's picture

So we cancelled on SD this weekend just gone. We had work and plans with friends, said we'd pick up during the week as extra (as it's half term) and have her 2 days at the weekend (so already extra to what we're supposed to). All hell broke loose. 

BM posted on Facebook a photo of SD crying with a tagline of "this is what happens every weekend when deadbeat dad doesn't show". Lies. Lies. Lies. We have her every weekend. We wanted to REARRANGE this one. Everyone knows how full on a dad he is. Normally. 

OH's mother and sister gave OH abuse down the phone saying his daughter always comes first. Work isn't important. If you can't get a job Mon-fri then don't get a job as your kids come first. Tracked us on social media to find where we are at specific times to have a go why we haven't got her. 

It's ridiculous. His mum hasn't spoke to him since without arguing, BM is threatening court and saying he's not getting his daughter anytime soon, everyone's having a go at us and interfering. Until this afternoon. When BM has suddenly decided he could have his daughter this weekend. Because it's convenient for her. 

I'm fuming at BM for playing my OH like a puppet, for trying to paint the wrong picture, overreacting and trying to undermine us by going to his mother. I'm fuming at his mother for siding with BM, for interfering all the time and telling us how to live our life, for treating her like an absolute princess etc etc. And I'm slightly annoyed at my OH for allowing it all to happen just because he's had enough of the arguing and just wants to see his daughter. 

Earlier in the week he stood by everything he did/we did/I said and had actually calmed down with his Disney parenting which really reassured me of a future that he was listening to me more and listening to his mother less. We'd even spoke about moving out of town so he didn't have his mother interfering and wanted to get his daughter one day a week instead of 2/3 but have it set in stone so no one would be let down. 

It's all just been too much this week and I'm lost at what to do now. Thankfully me and him have been great for a few weeks now, but he's been suffering mentally so I've had to help him a lot and put a lot of issues on the back burner. Just want an easy life!! 


Monique52's picture

This was my life for 2 years!!!!! Family getting in the midle. BM posting things on Facebook Drama drama drama.

You need your time with your husband as well. Many couples get babysitters if they need to do something as a couple and nobody says anything. Just ignored them...

Daisymazy2's picture

your DH back to court?  He missed one weekend.  I am sure the judge would just laugh BM out of the court room. Judges do not force visitation.  Court ordered visitation is to make sure BM has SD ready and available for visitations doesn't mean your DH is forced to visit.   Is the picture she posted with SD crying is SD crying because her dad isn't picking her up or because of something else.  No one reallly knows except BM.  

I would call BM on her bluff and tell her lets go back to court.  She was probably mad because she had plans and in her eyes your DH  ruined them.

I  say ignore her and her family.  If her mom or dad calls, phone goes to voicemail and delte voicemail without listening.  They will stop calling if no one responds.  It may take away with crazy people though.

Daisymazy2's picture

what type of parent would post a picture of their child crying on the internet about missing a visit with their father.  BM's oldest daughter, not SD,  posted a video of her son crying and posted that this is how he gets after visiting his father.  The judge blasted her away for shaming her son on social media.

CLove's picture

Just wow.

Thankfully Toxic Troll hasnt done that. She actually goes the opposite way and will post about my DH being "the best daddy ever" and "the best ex husband ever", after cussing him out and calling him name like cold-hearted bast and effing a-hole.

tog redux's picture

What a pack of witches your DH has to deal with. No wonder he found BM attractive with a mother like that. They are all hurting SD with this crap far more than one missed weekend does, and he should point that out to them. 

Tbis is why you don't date or marry Mama's boys. They can't stand up to their mother, and by extension, their ex.