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Would this be overstepping?

SASX's picture

Ok so the fskids both failed sections of the FCAT which they need to pass to graduate HS and get a Diploma. Florida Virtual Schools offers a free online test prep course to help kids. BM and BF think it would be 'unfair' to require the skids to take the course over the summer.

Not my kids, not my problem in this area isn't working for me. I see a future filled with these kids never leaving home as they wouldn't be able to read or add.

Would it be out of line for me to bribe the kids to do it? $1.00 per completed assignment, extra $50.00 of they complete the class before summer ends. Money is theirs to spend as they see fit.

It would make it their choice. If they want to do it, they make money. If they don't do it they don't get money. Since neither have a job and will want to do fun summer activities with friends that cost money (movies etc.) it is a way for them to earn while they learn.

What do you ladies think?


MamaBecky's picture

If by saying its unfair did the parents say no, or did they just say that they thought it would be unfair to make them? Before bringing it up to the SKIDS I would ask your DH what he thinks. Call it an incentive, not a bribe. Wink LOL He may think that adding monetary compensation and making it there choice will make it more "fair". If you get his blessing, go for it. If he still feels you should stay out of it...then you should. Make the offer but dont push it if the kids arent receptive.

On a side note it is ridiculous that they think it's unfair in the first place. They failed and wont graduate without it. Seems like the good parenting choice would be to make them. It is fair...they had there chance to apply themselves throughout the school year...they CHOOSE not its totally fair that now they have to make it up during summmer. I wouldnt go there though....I'm just sayin'. Blum 3

alwaysanxious's picture

Are you sure you want to involve yourself? what if you just start planting the seed of "they aren't living here once they turn 18" idea?

I've been doing that with skids to SO. SD15 got bad grades for the first time in her life. I'm already telling SO, she'll be on her own after graduation. I hope you don't plan to pay her rent when she's grown. You'll be doing it a long time otherwise.

Disneyfan's picture

Stay out of it. Let the parents decide how to handle this. They are not ignoring the problem and the kids are trying. They took the intense course all year and managed to get an A in the course. They are both on the honor roll. They both passed the other areas of the exam. The problem isn't a lack of knowledge/ not understanding the material. They have had to deal with test prep all year. They deserve a break. If they had been slackers all year, failed their classes AND the exam, then I would say go for it. Mom came up with an idea that will allow them to graduate. If dad agrees, then the problem is solved. Stay out of it.

stormabruin's picture

Mom's idea to send them to another state to graduate where they aren't required to pass the test would be a disservice to the kids. She didn't "come up with an idea". She gave them a cop-out. The problem ISN'T solved, but rather the kids are given an "out" of a situation instead of being pushed to work & earn their way.

Hardly a favor to the kids or the taxpayers who may very well end up paying their way through welfare...

stormabruin's picture

Offering them an opportunity to earn money by taking the course over the summer is unfair, but not encouraging them...let alone, not offering them the option to take it & sit by whistling a fine tune while their children DON'T graduate HS or get their diploma isn't unfair???

If you're offering the money out of your pocket, ask your BF if he would mind you making the offer. It's not a requirement, just an opportunity. If he says no, I guess you'd be overstepping to go ahead & do it. I guess I don't understand what he feels is unfair about you trying to help & encourage his children to achieve & succeed very basic life skills & a HS diploma that they HAVE to have to make it on their own.

Parents who love their children WANT their children to succeed. They WANT them to be independent & be able to provide for themselves. People NEED to be able to do that for themselves to feel happy in life.

They didn't accomplish what they should've accomplished in the school year. Encouraging education is NOT abuse, however not encouraging it is.

It shouldn't have to fall on you to offer them money to help this happen for them. It shouldn't even be an "offer". Their parents should be MAKING them do this.

You're a good person to have their best interest at heart. It's a shame their parents don't.

Stpma's picture

I think they should be required to do it without bribery. I think not my kids, not my prob fits perfectly here.