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It’s been awhile and a sports question.

MissK03's picture

I haven't blogged in a bit. Nothing really going on to be honest. SD decided to grow her nails out so she ripped the fake ones off. Last time I blogged was 1/8/22 and that was the last time BM took her and saw her. SD has a dance Friday maybe she will throw them on for that not sure. SDs birthday is coming up so she will see her for that reguardless... 3 months.. she's gone longer though soo **shoulder shrugs**

SD did mention to me that she texted her and asked her "what was going on." SD said how she got another fish tank (small desk tank with a beta) so BM bought her (I found it on Amazon) a $12 decoration set. SD said maybe she's trying to make up for stuff. She apple cashed her $40 for making honor roll at the end of January so that's why SD said that. **eye roll** 

SD has made honor roll 14 times now and that was the FIRST time BM "rewarded" her for it. 

SS17 never sees her besides birthday and Xmas and maybe in the driveway if she does something with SD and SS18 not sure what he does.. We don't think he actually sees her often.  He talks to her the most though.. Craves her attention. 

We don't know how yet but BM scammed SS18 with something with his taxes. SO doesn't ask many questions so we have no idea. Whatever not my problem. 

I have question at what point (if any) do confront (s)kids about their athletic ability...

SD was at her friends house this weekend and the dad coaches basketball. He wants SD to play next season. SD played in 5th, 6th, and 7th grade for the town...

Shes not athletic at all. SD is 6'1" so yeah... great height for basketball BUT she isn't made to play.. if you get what I'm saying. 

SD is in all advanced classes and is already stressed out some days about school as a high school freshman. I really don't think she will be able to balance both school and sports without a total mental break down AND I don't want SD to embarrass herself. 

She also is NOT competitive... To me it's just has disaster written on it. Who knows if she will actually end up playing or not so I am jumping a little bit here. 

My question being has anyone ever had conversations with skids or bios about these type of situations? Just let them go for it.. if they fail they fail.. if they succeed great!!

SO already said he isn't going to discourage her from trying and I GET that BUT I'm just not sure of the whole thing. 

I don't want to be unsupportive either. 

Any tips would be great. 


Mominit's picture

Just a hunch, but I think you're suffering second hand embarrassment.  It's high school.  If she gets picked for the team either she's good enough, or they don't have enough players and everyone gets on.  She'll make friends, have a team experience, and either shine, or support others who couldn't play if they don't have enough players.  If she's not a great player, hopefully the other players will support her efforts.  Most teenage girls drop out of sports before the end of high school.  Those who don't seem to have a great experience and learn social skills that carry them far.  And if she actually improves at the sport through practice, who knows, she could even get a scholarship to play at a college level (since females in sports are increasingly a rare find!)

I'd say support her in whatever she chooses to do, and if you can do it with kindness, make sure she has a realistic view of her abilities so that she doesn't feel that she has to be the best at sports and can just enjoy the experience.

stepmomnorth's picture

This is not something that requires a discussion. If she enjoys basketball she'll try out and either make it, or not make it. Kids know when they try out there's a possibility they might not make it, it's not something they need to be sheltered from. If they do make it, it could be good for them. Telling someone they're bad at a sport and to not try out for something is a bad idea. I would not discourage her from trying out. 

ESMOD's picture

If the concern is really that she won't have time for sports on top of her school work.. then that is something for her father to discuss with her.. 

However, it's possible that the physical outlet would actually help her manage her stress.  She also might find that with proper coaching.. she actually gains some skills and could be good.

The only helpful thing would be to offer to help her do some training before tryouts.. give her some head start on physical conditioning..if she wants to do that.  

Your opinion that she isn't coordinated or talented enough.. is better kept to yourself.

justmakingthebest's picture

I agree with the others. If she wants to try out, she should! It might be great for her. If she is awful, she won't play in games but will still get the benefit of the practice and being on a school team. I can't even imagine the number, but thousands and thousands of athletes handle sports and school every year. You don't know what she is capable of until she tries.