MIL Issues...Update to the Update, Yes the drama continues!
How would you respond to being asked to "board your dogs" so that out of town family could stay in your home for a family reunion?
Well, my reaction was not good. I was honestly offended, and told my DH, no I am not going to do that. We have a dog that isn't always friendly, and neither of us are comfortable exposing "toddlers or children" to him. This "subject" is a constant argument in my home. Now, my MIL keeps calling my home, cell phone, and now my work because she is trying to sway my feelings. I have no problem inviting adult family to stay, just no kids. I haven't returned any of her phone calls, because I don't have anything to say and want to be left alone. Apparently, she hasn't gotten the hint. I realize I probably didn't handle the situation properly by not returning her phone calls, but now I feel like I'm being harassed. My DH doesn't agree with me and will not put her in her place. I'm so annoyed!!
Well, I spoke to MIL on phone last night. Conversation went as follows:
MIL: I'm sad that you are avoiding me, I wanted to discuss a few things with you regarding family coming in for reunion.
ME: As I mentioned to DH numerous times in the past weeks, I do not wish to discuss any further the "boarding of the dogs" with you or him. You have called numerous times without a response from me, I thought you would figure out I don't want to discuss it with you any further. I will not be boarding the dogs, DH said he talked to you last night and gave you our options, so leave it at that please.
MIL: Contrary to your belief, I pretty much got the message that you'd rather not have guests after the second appeal. I just wanted some clarification from you directly.
WTF??? If she "got the message," why pursue it any further? She's just mad because she didn't get her way. Can we say.....BULLY!!
Today, I receive this email from MIL:
I'm sorry if I caused problems between you and DH. That was not my intention,
and doubt that I have that kind of power. I told DH that I should have
gone directly to you in the first place, but that's hind site. My recent calls were to ask about another option. If that wasn't agreeable then go to plan B and the financial info thing. That too is a mute issue. This reunion is important to me because it's possibly the last time that I'll see some of these people. The only drawing card to get people here is a reunion. Most I have not seen in 5 years since the last reunion. If I'm even here in 5 years, doubt that I'll have the energy to do another one. I'm sure that you can relate to that having a sibling living out of state.
I appreciate your apology, and understand your plight. Has it occurred to you that you might be unnecessarily jumping the gun on trying to foresee the "accommodation needs" for those who might be attending? In my opinion, if family/loved ones really want to attend the reunion they will, regardless of their options for accommodations. Meaning, it wouldn't be a deciding factor in most cases.
We offered to have adults stay with us for the reunion, which I feel is reasonable and un-negotiable. I'm sure everything will work out.
Hopefully this clarifies things for you, because I am done discussing it any further.