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Another post got me thinking...

Last-Wife's picture

Do bio-mom's put locks on their doors or buy locked trunks to keep kids out of their things?

Gibby's only 9, so I only worry about him getting into my secret food stash or the secret stash of batteries for his video games.

But Loghead accused me of being selfish the other night because I won't share my things. He says it's cold and hateful towards the children.

Now mind you, I was pissed because he had allowed Lazy Boye 14, who had the flu, to use my pillow. My expensive pillow. The only one that keeps me from weekly visits to the chiropractor. The pillow that everyone in the house KNOWS to stay the hell away from.

Gibby was the one who came and told me! 'Dad's letting Lazy Boye use your pillow! No one's supposed to use it!"

So a little later, I asked Loghead about it, and he said, 'The boy is sick, he's in pain. It'll make him feel better... What's the big deal?"

GGGRRR...

But being the nice SM that I am, I went ahead and let the little shit fall asleep with it. And then I yanked it out from under his head, and immediately threw it in the washer with major amounts of bleach.

Is it wrong to want my stuff to be MY STUFF? There are things I have that I don't even want Gibby to use, so I put them away.

Comments

lm862003's picture

I think it's hard for step parents sometimes to feel like they have anything for just themselves. So that makes sense. My wife needs to carve out things that are just for her that neither I nor my son touch. She had to explain that to me though, because it did look like she was being selfish at first. Hiding batteries is just smart, and a food item or two, hey no big.

AlexandraL's picture

I am a biomom with a key lock on her bedroom door. I trust my kids but feel I deserve to have a place of my own that is off limits. My dad actually suggested that I get one since he and my SM have one themself. My SM's adult kids would go in their house AND bedroom when they'd go out of town (they didn't live with them) and my dad and SM finally had enough.

It's been great when my kids have gotten grounded and I've taken the internet away because the router is in my room and there's no way they can get to it. Wink

GoodbyeNormaJean's picture

I'm also a BM with a keyed lock on my door. It wa there a long time before DH and his kids moved into the house. I'll tell ya one thing that's changed, though. The pantry. When it was just my bios, I coul have bought out the Hostess factory and trusted them to make good choices. SS12 has resource issues, so I have to have a pantry in my room now and dole out snacks individually. Otherwise he will literally eat everyhing as soon as he finds it. DS11 had a fridge I'm his room before SS moved in. We realized it was a problem and put a lock on it.

My bios have never been allowed to come and go from my room at will. It's always been my workspace and my defrag area.

stepsonhatesme's picture

I have a lock on our bedroom. I'm with NormaJean. I have a big tote in my room that I keep all the "good/extra" food in it.
My bio kids would take the goodies but they would always confess. My SS would take and eat it thru-out the house.(eating is only allowed in the kitchen and dining room)
We would leave the house and come back home to find $$, clothes, food, radio, cd's and all sorts of things missing...but yet nobody took them. Even though SS doesnt live with us now we still keep it locked b/c of kids' friends.
(my sons ADHD meds were actually stolen right out of our room) That's when the lock went on!!