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Finally done with restraining order hearing

Jcksjj's picture

DH finally had his restraining order hearing, which he won. FIL showed up with his arm in a sling and his dentures taken out for effect. FILs attorney did a lot of lying and attempting to get DH to misspeak so he could call him a liar. FIL said almost nothing except that DH punched him and claimed he had a massive amount of injuries. Didn't even tell his version of the story. 

The judge told FIL that there was enough evidence to show harassment because there was an act of violence, and the events leading up to it (showing up unexpectedly at our house and DHs work etc) also did. She also said that she could probably find DH guilty of harassment also but they don't do both ways at that type of hearing. It annoyed me that she said that, I'm assuming it was because DH swung back at him, so that is technically an act of violence. But still, DH ignored them for years, and they aggressively pursued a fight for years so it was irritating that she threw that in. But whatever, hopefully now it's over. MIL and FIL both looked old and tired, and MIL looked a bit ashamed when she saw me walk in to the courtroom. As she should.


CajunMom's picture

I'm happy you guys got a guilty verdict and can now live in peace. That should be a warning to the other crazies. 

Ispofacto's picture

Some judges are old fashioned and still subscribe to the tradition of children being unconditionally deferential to their elders, however psycho they may be.

You'd think with all the dysfunction they see everyday, they'd wholeheartedly embrace the concept of disengaging, but some judges are not very bright.

She fed FIL's victim psychosis somewhat, and that is unfortunate. Hopefully he still understands to leave ya'll alone now.


Jcksjj's picture

It felt to me like a judge that didn't understand DV dynamics and thinks there's always 2 sides to everything. Or maybe thinks a son and dad can't have that dynamic. 

AgedOut's picture

I think it was more of a warning. That if your husbands family resurfaces and attacks him, call 911, do what you have to to protect yourself abut don't pummel the crap out of them (even though they deserve it)

Jcksjj's picture

Maybe? He didn't actually hurt FIL at all even though he did swing back at him, but they did try to make it sound way worse and really tried to play up FIL as a weak old man. 

I will also say DH did come across as the angrier party (which he should be, but still) and did get in a couple snarky remarks towards his parents about their behavior that I think he wanted to get out in a safe place. Not great for court, but I think it made him feel better for him to be able to tell them he knew what they were doing. 

StepUltimate's picture

So happy to read this update!!


Rags's picture

try to share the pain.  They did with us even though we won resoundingly in court the Judge would hedge with baffling hedge comments ....

'Any child would be blessed to have the love and support of this wonderful family.' After shredding the SpermIdiot for his arrest record, etc......

'I hope everyone feels better. Now I am going to do what I always do.' - He had his skivvies in a bunch because we refused to allow a 5th delay to the hearing so he could preside over a Murder trial. If he had just issued his ruling rather than keeping everyone in court all day he could have immediatley shifted to his Murder trial. Since he apparently 'did what (he) always' did in these types of cases.

'The age of the respondents GF is not at issue. The Plaintiffs husband is older than she is.' - Completely ignored the fact that the Spermidiot has a repeated history of mollesting Teen girls. I am 12yrs older than my bride. She was of age when we met and then married.  He was mollesting underage girls.  At the time of the case the Spermidiot was 25 and his GF was 16. In a state where the age of concent is 18. He was 23 and my DW was 16 when SS was born.  He had multiple 16yo or younger GFs before and after he and my DW were together.  The courts never addressed his statutory rapist career.

So... do not give the idiot in the Harry Potter robes slinging the Fisher-Price toddler hammer any more thought beyond the basics of the ruling.

The Judge nailed FIL. The Judge tried to deflect by mentioning your DH.

Typical waffling from a spineless Judge.

IMHO of course.