for those that didn't read the comments:

I called a Planned Parenthood like someone suggested.  I don't know why I didn't think of them before, I forgot they existed.  They DO provide the services I need done unlike the current free/sliding scale clinic I have been going to for years.  One problem, and this is why insurance companies are crooks:

out of the 50 LOCATIONS in my state alone, only ONE of them is considered "in-network" by my insurance.  Okay, no big deal.  I call to see about appointments and inquire about costs.  The office visit I was told would be on the high-end due to the nature of the visit so that's $230, could be more.  The ultrasound itself? $175.  Planned Parenthood told me they would bill my insurance for it and whatever they didn't cover they would apply to a "sliding fee scale" so I could pay it.  Great!  I call my insurance company with this info to see what is covered.....nothing.   NONE OF IT is covered because (and I quote) "This isn't considered part of the 'family planning', you have to pay for all of it". I asked her to re-iterate, surely I heard wrong.  Nope. "You aren't pregnant, this isn't necessary".  DH is PISSED.  SO my insurance will "help me" if god forbid I bring an unwanted child into this world...but when it comes to the female anatomy NOPE!!  What a crock of crap!!  What is the point of me even having insurance?? Oh that's right, like car insurance that doesn't cover crap it's "for emergencies".  I told them I even had a referral from my clinic requesting I get this done and it doesn't matter, it's not considered necessary.  Seriously?? GTFOH.

I called the clinic back and asked about appointments, they only have ONE doctor that does this testing.  They have ONE opening on the 31st otherwise he is booked until the end of March. (I wish it wasn't a 'he' but nothing I can do about it)  I am seeing this as an omen and made the appointment.  I have an HSA for a reason, and you guys are right.  This has been going on for about 3 years and counting, I need to know wtf is going on with my defective body.  I mean c'mon, it's the only "free" thing I can enjoy with DH and it sucks...J/K J/K

DH is extremely supportive, he says he doesn't care if we are never physically intimate again as long as I am better.  He says "I didn't marry you for that, it's not that important.  I'm with you, for you"  So I guess he is only an a$$hat some of the time lol. Amazing how he can say some of the dumbest stuff or have the most outlandish theories when it involves SS....then says something like this.

Oh and I am not helping DH pay for his insurance deductible.  Update on the hit and run; they found the owner of the vehicle but need to prove they were the one driving, also they can't find the car because it is being hidden.  So the police are trying, there just isn't any progress.  Insurance company thinks nothing will come from it, said driver will probably just get a citation.  When DH asked "isn't a hit and run a felony?" She didn't know.  There is no insurance broker because DH got his policy online.  On the plus side, DH re-configured his insurance starting next month: raised his coverage and made sure the rental care coverage was on it.  Said his policy only went up $6/month.  Sucks it couldn't have been done sooner.  He is also enjoying the bus and is debating using the bus on days when he doesn't have visitation to save on vehicle costs but is unsure.  His bus route only takes 35 minutes home, today is the first time taking the bus to work.... so we'll see if it's still good.  My bus route takes over two hours so not an option for me sadly, would be nice to not have the gas expense.

Lets hope Feb turns out to be better, I vote Feb 1st as a "New Year Re-Do".