This blog is going to be all over the place, forgive me.

DH decided against leaving last Friday for the friends house and left on Saturday morning instead.  I had the house to myself...but thanks to these stupid antibiotics and feeling like complete crap I just sat on the couch like a lump wrapped up in a blanket with a mason jar of cherry 7-up and my pup, binge-watching Netflix.  Our friend's girlfriend was upset that I didn't go and was nice enough (sarcasm) to consistently send me messages throughout the weekend about how much fun they were all having, "wish you were here!", DH posted pictures of his drinks online, Friend send me a picture of the home-made pasta salad and STEAK they were eating for dinner (cruel...as I was choking down week-old cold turkey...thanks DH) I hate how we never eat like that unless its a visitation weekend.  I honestly can't think of a single time (other than our anniversary) that we didn't make steak or something special for visitation... then our weekend comes along and *poof* all the 'good food' is gone and we are eating crap or whatever we can find aka 'mystery freezer-burn meat' and rice.  I need to get better at my meal budgeting but I don't want to spend my non-skid weekends grocery shopping so DH doesn't use "our meals" for skid meals.

I got mad after seeing the picture of her plate and went online for grocery delivery.  Went a little nuts and ordered cream cheese wantons (sp?), cheese pizza, ice cream, and a package of Ramen for the next work week.   Not exactly in the budget but not being able to drive anywhere without severe nausea is the pits.  1.5 days left of these stupid pills.  I don't think they are working.  I also don't know what is going to happen at my next appointment on the 28th.  Fingers crossed that it hasn't spread.  So far it's constant nausea, random blurred vision, loss of appetite, room feeling like it's "on a tilt", driving with my head out the window like Ace Ventura in case I puke,  and the newest one: an odd disgusting substance that seems to coat my tongue and leave a disgusting taste in my mouth even if I brush my teeth four times a day. 
Can't wait for this to be over.  I hate not feeling "normal".

Sunday SIL heard I wasn't going with DH and felt bad so she stopped by to hang out and watch a movie.  She was nice enough to bring wine...that I couldn't drink lol  We talked a bit about the "friend" in the hospital.  I was curious because SIL is closer friends with this person than DH but she is really staying off FB and not commenting or saying anything about this.  She said "I hate how everyone on FB doesn't get it.  I saw "friend" a few times a month and we talked almost every day.  These people that are spending all this time at the hospital and creating websites and GoFundMe's and such haven't spoken to this "friend" in years.  They don't know them like I do and they are all getting involved.  "friend" doesn't want to be hooked up to all these machines, "friend" wants to die and everyone is being selfish and won't leave them alone in peace."  I guess the kids don't even want to visit because they haven't seen the parent in so long and they don't care.  They are mad it got so bad.  SIL has been to the hospital once.  Funny how different opinions are between DH and SIL regarding this whole scenario.  It's sad.  DH wants to "save" them, SIL wants everyone to GTH. 

Schedules and skids.  Oh lord.  This entire week DH is on call for work, meaning we can't do anything this non skid weekend because he could get called at a moments notice to go in to work.  Given that it's daylight saving's time, he is going to be at work for sure changing all the clocks.  So there goes this weekend.  Next weekend is a skid weekend and SIL husband has a birthday and the following day one of our mutual friends with no kids is having a birthday celebration at some go-cart thing at a mall.

DH is losing his mind.

He feels like last visitation wasn't 'good enough' because even though SS had a friggin BLAST on his play date, DH says " I had no time with him".  Monday DH got mad at BM because she was doing something with SS and DH LOST 15 MINUTES OF "HIS TIME"....so in retaliation DH kept SS UNTIL drop off time THEN drove him home, making SS a 1/2 hour late for drop off. I know BM does that crap all the time with DH, so I don't blame him for doing it back....but damn it's just 15 friggin minutes...seriously?? It is very petty and makes DH no better than BM.  DH is also already obsessing over "take your kid to work day" next month...(I hear about it every other day)...he will get 8 extra HOURS with SS that week...but he is going to throw a fit over 15 minutes? 

Anyway, add on the "no time with ss" last weekend and DH is mad because SIL says she has arranged for a babysitter to watch everyone's kids next Friday for a few hours while we all go to a brewery for her husbands birthday.  Saturday is the go-cart thing.  I personally think it is rude to assume you can bring your child to someone's birthday celebration when there aren't going to be any other kids.  DH friend isn't going to want to watch DH entertain an 11 y/o when the focus should be on celebrating birthday. 

DH is throwing a mantrum and is debating refusing to go to both things because it "takes away time from my son".  OMFG I am SO tired of this.  DH even let SS call the shots all last weekend, going as far as letting SS chose the day they were leaving to go to the play date, and saying "if you don't want to stay over let me know and we will come home whenever you want to".  SS CHOSE to stay and play...and now DH is all butthurt about it when it was DH idea in the friggin first place!  These Disney-Dad's OMG I swear I'm going to lose my mind if I hear DH say "my son/my time/time spent" one more time like his kid is friggin gods gift to the world. *puke*

The 30  minutes of "make up time" was pointless because SS was just sitting on the couch  playing on DH laptop.  They weren't having a conversation, not doing anything together, weren't even sitting next to each other but somehow "sitting in the same room for 30 minutes doing nothing" is "time well spent".  Yet SS playing with friends actually doing something away from an electronic is "wasted visitation".  DH makes no sense. 

Sorry this blog is all over the place.  Maybe I can skip the last stupid day of these antibiotics.  So tired of feeling like an alien.

Anybody else deal with "disney dad" when it comes to non-skid events on skid weekends??