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BettyRay's picture

BM has applied for a job at the company I work for, a different department, but still, why??????

So now I can run into her in the cafeteria, or on my way to a meeting. :sick:

I have been enjoying seeing her less and less as the skids get older. Now this.

I have almost 18 years with this company. I don't feel like starting over somewhere else.

WHY? :O :?



BettyRay's picture

HR did contact me. I was honest and said I have not worked with her professionally, but that from my experience she is scattered and not punctual.


hereiam's picture

Don't tell me she put you as a reference? Or does she have the same last name, so they asked if you were related?

BettyRay's picture

We don't have the same last name. HR asks for all the names you've been known as and she put DH's last name down. Because we are married DH's name is linked with mine in the HR database. They wanted to know if she was a relative. I said only if you count ex-wife-in-laws as a relative.


hereiam's picture

Oh my God, that would be awful!

Back when my SD was pretending that she wanted a job, she asked DH if my company was hiring. Um, not you.

ProbablyAlreadyInsane's picture

*walk into bosses office*

"Yes Hello... I feel (insert name) would be a poor choice and could cause a hostile work environment due to the fact she's insane..."

Sweet T's picture

My exes first ex gf from after our divorce works for the same company I do. She is on another campus but will be on the floor b slow me in may.

DaizyDuke's picture

Ew, does she know you work there?? Where was she working prior and why is she looking for new job??

BettyRay's picture

YES she knows I work here. I carry DH the skids on my insurance. The card has my company name and logo on it.

I have no idea why she applied here; she has worked at the same job for as long as DH and I have been together.


Blue Moon's picture

I really hope she doesn't get the job, but if she does, be sure to walk around the office KNOWING you're the one your DH loves, you're the «new and improved model». Dirol

MrsZipper's picture

There is a user on this board named "New Imprved Model" and every time she posts it sounds like her DH is about ready to trade her in for an even newer model. As my SDs used to tell me, wives are replaceable - he divorced the first one and got another, he can divorce you and get another. So I really dislike the "New improved model" mantra.

Blue Moon's picture

I know I was being sassy, but I think the OP is not the one who should feel threatened here. She has been at that job for years, and she is the one with her DH.

MrsZipper's picture

My BM is incredibly successful professionally, thankfully we are in different industries but if she were to come to my job I would feel on edge. And we also don't know the circumstances of BM and DHs divorce. I know everyone likes to think that their DH got sick and tired of their ugly, mean, overweight BMs and dumped them for something much better, but you know in reality at least half of the DHs on here were dumped by the BM. We don't know enough to know whether she should be threatened or not.

ETA: my point is, her being there a long time doesn't necessarily mean anything positive or negative, and her being DHs wife doesn't necessarily mean anything positive or negative.

It sucks to feel like you have your space invaded, so I get her post.

BettyRay's picture

I don't feel threatened, I feel like annoyed. I like my personal life being separate from my professional life.


Aniki's picture

Gads, BettyRay, that sucks! 3 years ago, DH got SDthen18 a PT job where he worked. BioHo actually had the gall to call him and ask why he didn't try to help HER get a job there. WTH.

Cooooookies's picture

Everyone knows stories about BM2 and what she's done/doesn't do so it would be interesting if she got a job where I work. I work in a hospital and she's a nurse so it would be possible...had she still lived here Blum 3

Dontfeedthetrolls's picture

BM posted on her Facebook about how she had applied and had a "great" interview at a location that my ex use to work at. He got the call from his old boss the second she walked out and they LAUGHED together. The woman is blacklisted from the place due to her insane behavior while my partner was working there.

He worked in a public service position and she use to call nonstop to yell at him and demand others put him on the phone. They almost had to fire him over it because they couldn't actually work. Yet she seems to have totally forgotten about that. Plus the person who interviewed her LOVED my partner and knows all the crap this woman did to him so she's not to keen on working with the woman either.

But BM seems to have no clue about this.

ntm's picture

Hahaha, I probably pissed BM off when I first moved back here by getting a job where she works. University, large campus, only ran across her twice while I was there. I’ve since changed jobs, but I may end up there again in a nice academic year retirement job.

Thumper's picture

So sorry to hear this. I would be beyond creeped out.

what are you going to do?

I would be running to HR and tell them...I AM SCARED TO DEATH of this women and based on her track record she is NOT a reflection of company values. Before you know it HR she will file a law suit against you so be forewarned. Be sure to check ALL possible records. Wink

CLove's picture

That would creep me out - no wonder you are "WTF???? Cant I just live a peaceful life without this sh!t?"

Luckily I am in a completely different industry/work area/city. TBM (Toxic Bm) works 45 minutes away, and is working in the school system (actually a little jealous - great benefits, retirement, summers off, breaks everywhere...), and I am in the business arena.

Good luck on that one!

BettyRay's picture

This totally. I'd like to just have one area of my life that isn't tainted by BM.


CLove's picture

She will taint everything possible, thats what the toxic BMs like to do. I hope her job hunting takes her somewhere else. You've been there a very long time, this is YOUR territory, she needs to find a new stomping ground.

Aunt Agatha's picture

Oh no! Fight this! As I’ve mentioned before, the psycho BM in my life stalked me for a while and did end up egging a job in my former place of employment, working with but not under a former boss of mine.

I’ve let people in the department she could apply to at my current company, who I am friendly with, know all about her so they would never hire her.

If your company is big like mine, it might not hurt to track them down and share your very professional concerns that she would create a hostile work environment. I’d also mention she’s your SOs ex and has been aggressive or whatever to you.

Your company will not want to take that kind of risk when there are likely many fine candidates for the position. Especially if it could also mean losing a valued employee like yourself.

ESMOD's picture

I think that I might have said. "well, I'm married to her ex-husband.... so I'm not sure I would be the best recommendation... we aren't that close...if you know what I mean".

That might be enough for them to not want to hire a potential conflict.

Just J's picture

years ago right before DH and I got married, DH, me and BM all worked in the same industry. BM lost her job due to her company closing and DH mentioned to her that my company had an opening. She interviewed but didn't take it, thankfully, but I asked DH what the hell he was thinking because I would have had to work almost directly with her had she taken the job. He claimed he just wanted her to have a job so she wouldn't cry poor and try to get more CS but that would have been a freaking nightmare!

Acratopotes's picture

Different floors, .. I'm torn

On the one hand I would say, not a problem and I would buddy up with HR, this way I would know how much she earns, and she will not be able to drain DH anymore, but seeing your kids are all out of CS.....

I'm so glad I work for an international company and it states clearly no family members can work in the same company, it was an issue cause SO and I started dating, cause not that is allowed lol.... They accepted it when they found out we've been dating for 5 years already before we went public, work function...We could proof there was not shit going on, no conflict of interest.

When BM got fired from her job she applied with us, SO immediately told HR head office, if you appoint her I'm leaving and so will Acra (I told him later wtf how can you decide what I'm doing you have no right... I would not have left) Our local HR is BM's friend and she would've appointed her but SO stopped it... dammit he sucks all the fun right out of my life

secret's picture

That sucks.

My BM is not currently employed.... she's in college for "vet tech". It's a 2 year full time program. She's a few years in already on a part time basis. Dragging it out, for the financial side of things.

DH told me that BM informed him that it will give her a ~70k starting salary.... Um.... DH, honey, here's the program. Expected starting salary is 30k.

I'm in a completely different field than BM, and even if she did change over to my field, she's several years behind in terms of pay scale etc.

And, she'd need to learn how to spell.