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OT - Eff Off/Forn Friday

Aniki-Moderator's picture

Happy Friday, STalkers! Are you ready for the weekend? It's going to be HOT in my neck of the woods. The forecast says 93 degrees on Sunday. BLECH!!! This Finn needs a long, cool dip in Lake Superior. Psssst... I also need a long, cool dip when it's 70. Wink

I've already had two requests for EOF, so let's get to it. Eff off to:

  • Effers who jump the gun in the attempt to be overly efficient and eff things up. Thank you SO much for submitting that request before it was complete. Still had two more tasks to add. Now I have to delete the original request and START ALL OVER. And since it was not your effing request, you should've kept your effing fingers off of the effing keyboard and your effing nose out of my work. May the fleas of a thousand camels infest your nether region. Scratch that. Black flies abound. You should go take a nap in the woods. Nekkid. On a big ol' ant hill. Wanker.
  • Black flies. Those vicious effers are out in force and I'm black fly chum. Crudmuffins!
  • King Pita. No, we are NOT having a meeting to recap the things discussed in your meeting that you missed yesterday. You want an update, go read the effing meeting notes. Fingers crossed I won't have to hear that ear-grating voice of his until next week. LATE next week. 
  • BioHo. 'Ho is PO'd at SS21. SS21 is irritated with 'Ho. Why? Because 'Ho found out via fakebook what day SS21 and future wife are getting hitched. IOW, SS21 should have called his mommy to tell her first. Call the waaaaaah-mbulance! So 'Ho called SS21 and pitched a major effing fit. Things have been strained between them now for MONTHS. 'Ho keeps texting/leaving voicemails to DH, beeyotching and moaning that SS21 owes her an apology. DH is not about to play referee between the two. Evil Aniki is laughing her arse off that 'Ho's favorite child refuses to toe the 'ho line. 


 On to Forn Friday! Forn is 'food' and 'p0rn' combined. Since it's obviously going to be bloody hot this weekend, here are some of my favorite, non-cook sides.


  • 2 bunches of Broccoli (chopped fine)
  • 1/2 cup red onion (chopped fine)
  • 10 pieces cooked bacon (chopped)
  • 1/2 cup raisins


  • 1 cup mayo (I use miracle whip light)
  • 1/2 cup sugar
  • 2 Tbsp vinegar (I use red wine vinegar)

 Mix dressing 1 hour ahead.  Mix all together, chill.




  • 6 ears corn, husks and silk removed
  • 3 scallions, thinly sliced crosswise (1/2 cup)
  • 2 Tbsp white wine vinegar
  • 2 Tbsp olive oil
  • Coarse salt and ground pepper


  1. Remove kernels: Cut off tip of each cob; stand in a wide, shallow bowl. With a sharp knife, slice downward to remove kernels.
  2. To bowl, add scallions, vinegar, and oil. Season generously with salt and pepper; toss to combine. Serve or cover and refrigerate up to 1 day.




  • 10-12 oz cherry or grape tomatoes, whole
  • 1 ripe avocado, cubed
  • 1/2 cup feta
  • Juice of 1/2 lime
  • 1-2 Tbsp olive oil
  • 1/4 tsp red pepper flakes
  • Salt and pepper to taste
  1. In a big salad bowl, place the tomatoes, avocado, and feta. 
  2. Drizzle with lime juice, olive oil, pepper flakes, salt, and pepper. Gently toss.
  3. Serve immediately or cover with plastic wrap and refrigerate for up to 2 hours.


Wishing you a stress-free and enjoyable weekend!


Chmmy's picture

Eff off to all the shit parents out there. I have been going to a few of the skids baseball games and realize my skids are not as bad as some of these nasty brats out there. The parents just encourage it. A kid got kicked out for arguing with the ump. Then the parents start arguing. He told mom she better stop and then the whole family got kicked out of the park. We were a minute away from having to forfiet because they wouldn't leave but the coach got them to leave...not quietly. The 14 year old kid was gining him the finger and swearing while leaving. DH was not there but when SS and I told him what happened, DH did tell SS he would break his fingers if he saw that. The skids are pretty well behaved in public most times because they are embarassed of their behavior. They know theyare a holes lol


Aniki-Moderator's picture

That's awful, Chmmy! And I certainly second your eff off to those shite parents. I can only imagine what a joy that little butthead will be in the future at a job. *dash1*

TheAccidentalSM's picture

Part of my mind can't believe that people behave like that.  If you know what I mean?

bananaseedo's picture

No eff off today YET...but I finally received a bite on my dozens and dozens of job applications/submissions of resume.

It's with a company in the industry I was in before my layoff-we actually worked with this company a lot.  They have very decent pay and the best part is that this is for a remote position.  That's really what I'm wanting-I put in for several positions there, most were in office which would put me back at a brutal commute that I'm sick of doing after 24 yrs of it-but this one is remote.  I realize it's the first step in the process but after hearing nothing for 6 weeks I'm pretty stoked to get a bite finally!

Gimlet's picture

This is my jam today, I am a cranky b*tch.

Eff off to being a stepparent.  This one is self-explanatory.

Eff off to alienating parents and their gross, dysfunctional BS.

Eff off to the lack of nuance that seems to be everywhere anymore.  I won't go into detail on the topic, but I am so tired of the loudest voices on both sides being the most extreme and feeling like there isn't any middle ground anymore.  It's getting to the point I don't want to talk about anything with people, even if we agree, because most of them aren't willing to do anything but virtue signal and toe the party line, and then they are upset when they get what they want (or what they are told they want) because there are unintended consequences for them.  UGH.

caninelover's picture

I can't effing stand these people anymore.  Seeing their social media is the worst.  I unfollow them because otherwise I would pop off in the comments and that isn't productive or mature.

Eff off to special snowflakes and their cancel culture.

Stepdrama2020's picture

Yes m'aam eff off to that.

The mindset is lets cancel it if we dont like it. Kid centric on steroids...I get my way cause i am speshul.

I have reduced conversations with co workers cause dang it gets heated. Dare you support a cause, political party, or a religion they dont like. It becomes heated and too much. I mean really? does this matter that much to you that I dont like purple and you do. LOL Picking the new office paint color was a nightmare too LOL  so eff off to difficult people.

I just want a world where respect is a given. 

Aniki-Moderator's picture

I'm sorry you're cranky, darlin'. I woke up that way, too. 

Soooooo hear you on that lack of middle ground and not wanting to talk about things. I rarely talk to anyone other than DH any more. 

caninelover's picture

To people who over-prepare and then over-prepare some more.  How many times can we look at a slide deck and tweak minor verbiage and colors?  


TheAccidentalSM's picture

I can't think of a proper Eff Off today.  I took the afternoon off yesterday and caught up for lunch and drinks with an ex-colleague/friend.  It was the best fun in forever.  We had a blast.  Amazing lunch followed up by drinks in a beautiful location.  And I had the day off work today.  I'm sure I'll be back in a proper Friday mood by next week.


I'm doing pasta with peas and greens beans tonight with ricotta and parmesan.  If I can find any bacon in my fridge I'll fry it and then crumble over the top.

Tomorrow is chorizo and flageolet bean soup.  New recipe to try to get rid of early pandemic flageolet beans.  Not entirely sure about this one.

Have a good weekend one and all

Aniki-Moderator's picture

TASM, I have never had flageolet beans. Sheesh, I've never even seen them! Let us know how your recipe turns out. 

Winterglow's picture

If you have no bacon, thinly slice you chorizo and grill it instead.

Cook your flageolets, sautee some mushrooms in a little butter, mix the two. Stir in a few (depends on the quantity) tablespoons of sour cream/creme fraiche and season (lots of freshly ground black pepper) to taste. It's great with roast lamb but goes with just about any meat and is good enough to eat on its own. 

Cover1W's picture

EFF off to YSD lying to our faces last night. No real shocker.

Just over a week ago I heard her talking with her friend via Zoom - YSD specifically asked her if she was getting the vaccine (YSD had just got the first dose and was really happy about it) and her friend said no.  YSD, after a moment's pause asked "But why not?!" Her friend said "Personal reasons." Mind you I have issues with this girls mother....anyway, this reallly bothered DH but he calmed down.

Last night he asked YSD if all her friends got the vaccine - she said the "thought so." He asked her if she had talked about it with all of them so she knew if she could personally get together with them this summer.  She said, "Not really....." BUT she knew two ofher friends who are near BM had theirs. I had to 'clear my throat' and walk away from the table. DH did tell her that she understood it would be more difficult to be around unvaccinated people and she understood (because YSD is STILL irrationally fearful - to the point of tears if DH asks her to do anything outside the house in a modicum of in public activities, even masked, but that's another topic).

I just busied myself cleaning up the kitchen a little.

It was unseasonably warm here over the long weekend (JOY for me!):

Tomato / Cucumber salad

Dice 2 tomatoes and 1 cucumber (skinned).  Add a couple tablespoons good olive oil, salt and pepper to taste. Eat all of it.

MissK03's picture

Eff off to everything. That is all. Stopping at the liquor store today for some deep eddys lemonade vodka. Hopefully it clears up later and I can sit on the deck with it. 

Aniki-Moderator's picture

Eff off to everything is popular today! Enjoy that vodka, MissK03! I'm cracking open my James T Kirk bourbon.  *drinks*

hereiam's picture

The Ruby Red Grapefruit is also awesome. Mixed with Sparkling Ice Pink Grapefruit flavored water- yum!

caninelover's picture

Going to a wine bar for a post-pandemic happy hour reunion with friends I haven't seen live since last March!  Cheers!

halo1998's picture

Long long week....

EFF off to my Dh's work.  They can all go suck a bag of d@cks.  What once used to be a nice family oriented business has now turned into a high school clique since they hired some @sshats from a well known corporation.  Just cause you worked for xxx doesn't mean you aren't an @sshole.  Dh now is on the hunt for a new job.

Eff of to my work place.  9 weeks of working every weekend and I FINALLY have a weekend off only to turn around and be oncall next week and work next weeken again.  BURN OUT PEOPLE...ITS CALLED BURN OUT

Eff of to WATER..yes water.  That sneaky SOB has found a way into my garage attic and now I have $1200+ repair bill.  I could be worse..but still..ugh.




Aniki-Moderator's picture

Dammit, halo, I'd like to send a case of gummi d*cks to your AND your DH's work!

Sucky about that $$$ repair bill. *diablo*

I'd like a vanilla custard, chocolate iced Bismarck, please! 

caninelover's picture

Jelly with powdered sugar.  Or just plain glazed.  I sure do love me a donut with coffee...

CLove's picture

1. Eff Off to Backstabber/Munchkin - Final Grades came out. I sent Husband a text with screen shot of 2 A's, 3 B's, 2 D's and an F in ART. So he is on the hook for $40, and Im not on the hook at all. I still have not gotten any kinds of apologies. NONE. But thats to be expected. No words of appreciation also. Just a big fat nothing. Which is what I spent on B/M's birthday. A few hours at the mall I bought nothing. So theres that.

2. Eff Off to the continual fog and gloom. Characteristic of this area in June, but Im wanting some sunshine right now.

3. Eff off to housework that has piled up because of lack of motivation.

FORN: because we are a seafood eating family, and got a bucketload of squid, here is one of my recipes for Calamari Salad (its like the tomatoe-Cucumber salad...)

1. A bag of cleaned and trimmed fresh squid.

2, Tomatoes Diced

3. Cucumbers Diced.

4. Minced garlis

5. Lemon wedges

6. Red onion

7. Chopped parsley.

sautee calamari in butter and olice oil and garlic - just 1-2 minutes. Squeeze lemon.

In a bowl add the raw ingredients and toss. Add more lemon. Chill. Add parika salt and pepper.

CLove's picture

Youd have to bring a case because even though my area is considered a "wine corridor" there is absolutely NOT ONE SINGLE place here that has that varietal Biggrin Sounds delish.

Cover1W's picture

Now I want calamari - and you know what?  I'll get it tomorrow. DH is taking me out overnight in a nearby town and our fave seafood restaurant is walking distance from the hotel.  Yay!

Merry's picture

Eff off to mansplainers. I'm the lead on a major project that includes cybersecurity elements. I'm no tech wiz, but competent enough to engage in non-techy discussion and policy. Asshat mansplained to me what "encrypted internet access" meant. My poor little lady brain just about exploded on him.

Forn. I have basil in the garden ready to go, and I am planning a lovely pesto over spaghetti squash. Hubs likes neither because his food preferences are that of the spoiled child he was. More for me.

Gimlet's picture

One of my favorite moments posted on Twitter:

A woman started a now-viral Twitter thread by asking, “What’s the most obvious thing you’ve ever been mansplained about?” Lots of women joined in, tweeting their own personal experiences and some of them are unbelievable. One comes from scientist Dr. Jessica McCarty, who shares that she was speaking at a NASA Earth meeting when a male postdoctoral researcher tried to mansplain her own published work to her.

This guy had no idea who she was or that she has impressive credentials, but he stopped her presentation to tell her she didn’t understand the subject and that she definitely “needed to read McCarty et al.” She tweets that she looked him in the eye, pulled her hair back so he could read her name tag and then told him, “I’m McCarty et al.”

Aniki-Moderator's picture

I can see his mental mansplaining dingus deflating... *diablo*

caninelover's picture

I love it when a douchbag gets whats coming to him.

Aniki-Moderator's picture

He should get a face full while his mouth is wiiiiiiiide open... *diablo*

Steppedonnomore's picture

EFF off to coworkers who warm something in the microwave at lunch and then just leave it sitting in there.  Have some consideration for others who are also wanting to warm up their lunch!  And while we are on the subject of coworkers, EFF off to those working from home who don't respond to email, don't forward their office phones to their home or cell number, and whose voice mailboxes are full.  TGIF !

Aniki-Moderator's picture

Steppedonnomore, that is something I do NOT miss about the office! Although I'd rather someone leave their lunch in the microwave than burn popcorn. Ick!

If I ignored my emails, I'd lose my job. WTH!

hereiam's picture

Just take it out of the microwave and set it on top. If they don't like it, they shouldn't leave it unattended.

Winterglow's picture

I had a coworker who would go for a long run at lunchtime, come back, take a shower, then stick his towel in the microwave for a couple of minutes, take it out and flap it dry... When I found that out, I stopped using the microwave. YUCK!