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She is out of control with spending OUR money!

Biostep7777's picture
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DH covers medical. Their son was exposed to someone who tested positive for Covid. He is with mom and they agreed of course to get SS tested and that she would take him since he's with her. So she takes him to a place that isn't covered under DH's insurance and says "they won't take your insurance so you owe me $200" 

This is ridiculous. There were lots of places she could take him that our insurance covers. We have a lot of Covid testing sites here. She said since he agreed to get him tested he has to pay. Grrrrr!!! What would you do?? And please, before you say just pay.... of course we cover anything these kids need but she does this all the time just to spend his money. They agreed to therapy. We found an awesome therapist that's covered under our insurance but no...she wanted to one that's no covered so he has to pay $200 a visit for two kids! That's $1400 a month compared to the copay of $10 a visit so $80 a month. He said if she wants to go with that one, he will pay the $80 and she can cover the rest. It's a coooooonstant issue! 

tog redux's picture

How much would it have cost with insurance? Pay that amount. She'll likely take you to court over it, eventually, though. DH refused to pay a bill for glasses when BM went to some place out of network. She eventually brought it up in court when she went for a child support increase and they made him pay it.  She did always go in network after that, though! Thankfully, DH's CO said she paid the first $250 of any medical expense, so it was rare for DH to have to pay anything.

Biostep7777's picture

It would have been $10. It wouldn't be a big deal if she didn't keep doing this but it's constant!!! He would have taken him too. He told her that. 

tog redux's picture

Pay her $10 then - it might force the issue to court, and maybe that's a good thing.  Why doesn't she have to help with medical at all? That might make her more interested in keeping costs down.

Biostep7777's picture

We are in the middle of a huge court battle right now. She's claiming he didn't provide her with accurate insurance information which doesn't make sense. Nothing has changed as far as insurance and DH just brought them to the dentist on Monday and insurance went through just fine. I also just picked up some prescriptions and insurance went  through just fine. So, I don't know what the issue is. First she said they don't cover it (which is what I originally posted) but we just got another text saying he didn't provide accurate insurance info (which he did) so who knows!!! He asked her to just forward all paperwork and he said he would straighten it out. She said she doesn't have time for his games and she will send this to the attorney if he doesn't pay her the second she sends paperwork. Lol!!! Yeah okay. 

tog redux's picture

Around here, insurance won't cover a COVID test unless a doctor orders it - maybe she didn't have that doctor's order, and is now trying to make it about insurance?

Her response indicates something is up for sure.

Biostep7777's picture

Nope. He was directly in contact with someone so he automatically gets it done 

hereiam's picture

Nope, I sure would not pay her 200.00 for a test she could have gotten him for 10.00, or even free.

Biostep7777's picture

She's saying DH told her to take him. Lol!!  He told her he was in direct contact and thinks he should get tested and can take him if needed. She said she's taking him but then says DH told her to take him. Omfg! She's completely annoying abd spins literally everything! 

Wicked stepmo.'s picture

You already pay for insurance and co pays. I wouldn't pay another dime. If she drags him to court he can fight to have it ordered that the kid sees someone in network or she pays the difference.

ndc's picture

It depends, I guess.  How easy would it have been to get a $10 test vs. a $200 test?  Did one require waiting in line for hours while the other did not? Was one much closer, or did only one fit into BM's schedule?

My skids can get low cost dental treatment through our state's CHIP program. But no dentists in our area take that insurance. BM refuses to take the skids to unfamiliar dentists in what she considers sketchy areas (and she's probably right about most of the areas). So DH just sucks it up and pays half the cost of BM's dentist of choice.  He's willing to do that because BM doesn't usually spend his money, and she thinks this is important enough that she (well, the Golden Goose) is also paying half.

So I'd look at the circumstances and decide if there was any good reason to get the non-insurance test, and act accordingly.

Biostep7777's picture

No. My husband had the best insurance around and you can go anywhere and her a test. I just tested my daughter and it was easy peasy. we still don't know what the issue is. She sent a receipt demanding payment but wouldn't show him the location, wouldn't show him the test results. It just shows the cost. He doesn't even know where to call to figure out the issue. Omg! 

Rumplestiltskin's picture

I wonder if you can modify the CO to include that covered providers have to be used except in an emergency, or DH isn't obligated to pay. These BMs. They must love having their exes pay the insurance, then not use it and hand the ex a big bill! I have always carried my kids on my insurance. It's a big chunk out of my paycheck and i'll be damned if that premium money goes to waste. 

simifan's picture

I wouldn't pay it and since he is in court anyway - he needs to ask for insurance providers only unless she has written permission from Dad or a court. I would also send a insurance card via certified mail - so she can't claim an issue with the insurance.

Sounds like she is being spiteful & he shouldn't pay it until the court or his attorney tells him he has too (& they will unfortunately since the procedure was already done).

Biostep7777's picture

She has a card AND he texted her a card. She said it's from 2020 but we looked through everything and everything is the same. Unless there was some issue with HR that we don't know about. They said he only has to contact them during open enrollment IF he wants any changes. There may have been some sort of issue with insurance but as far as we know, everything looks fine and if there was some mistake, he certainly was not aware and we will get it straightened out. She accused him of dropping the kids and told him he should give her updated info. Literally nothing has changed. I mean, why does she have to be so mean and awful about every little thing? It's nonstop! 

Rags's picture

Don't pay her a penny.  She knew it was an out of network location and yet SHE initiated the service. She can pay for it.

Thumper's picture

I would not pay 1cent either. Let it go to court.

You did not mention whether or not the current order reflect's: MOM pays first 1200 (guess amount) of out of pocket expenses. There after bm and dh split costs in 1/2.  Parent MUST provide other parent bill of services within 30days of medical appointment OR will forfeit claim to seek payment from other parent.

 

Something like that ^^^^DH should do himself a huge favor and get words to that effect in his new order. Also, some bm's will always go out of network to devil their ex's.  SOooooo it might be good to add WHEN bm decides to unilaterally take child to out of network providers, BM will pay 80percent of out of pocket and dh will pay 20.

jmo

 

 

Rags's picture

And.... most COs are very clear that medical expenses not covered by insurance are split between BioParents.  I would tell BM to KMA if I was your DH and if she forced the issue to court, pay only half, which is hopefully clearly stopulated in the CO.

Rags's picture

And.... most COs are very clear that medical expenses not covered by insurance are split between BioParents.  I would tell BM to KMA if I was your DH and if she forced the issue to court, pay only half, which is hopefully clearly stopulated in the CO.

Biostep7777's picture

She's trying to say since he makes more he should cover expenses. She's also mad because we just sold our other house snd she thinks we made a lot of money. Which yes, we did however, we had to pay off a ton of debt! We can't keep contributing to the lifestyle she expects and she's having a fit about it.