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horsefly's picture

Strange weekend.

Dh was snippy with me Friday night. Asked him why he's so miserable with me? He said he's not. (yeah okay)
So, Saturday, he's acting like a jerk, just having no patience with anything with me. Getting pissed with the dogs, being sarcastic, getting irritated with my driving, just all kinds of little things.

Then the phone calls started.
We don't have a land line phone, only cell phones, so his cell phone would ring and he would look at it and just hang it up and not say anything to me while I was sitting right there!!

It was happening like every 3 or 4 hours. So I asked him if it was work? He said no, that it was the home depot credit card co. calling because he was late on one payment. I said I had never heard of that before. He said they are just going to keep calling and he's just going to keep hanging up on them. I asked him why doesn't he just block the number? He said he couldn't block it. (?)

So, it was a miserable weekend.
Then while I was at work, he sent me a text message saying he was sorry for the roller coaster weekend and that his mind is mush and he loves me.

I don't know if it's about his daughter or not. (He said he wasn't going to tell me anything about her anymore cuz I get so pissed off.)

Has anyone heard of credit card co's calling when you are late on one payment?
I have a feeling he's lying about something.


kalmolil's picture

Are you kidding? Bill collectors will call if you're an hour late. Could very likely be the truth, or could be something else. Don't pressure him in to telling you - he'd tell you if he really wanted to. DH got to the point that he wouldn't tell me when BM would call him about SD because I used to get so pissed off about it. We took the issue to our counselor and she was able to help me communicate that by him not telling me it made me feel like he was being deceitful and hiding something which only created trust issues and made things worse. Since then he's been really good about communicating "hey I have to call BM and talk to her about xyz..." or "I'm calling BM so I can talk to SD" and it's not such a surprise anymore.

Kes's picture

I just read your post and I hope I'm not speaking out of turn here, as I don't know your situation or background information, but the way your DH was behaving, just everything about it - suggested to me that there may be something extra-marital going on here, rather than a SKID issue. I only suggest it because I have been there and know the signs. I do hope I am wrong, for your sake.

horsefly's picture

Well I found out what his problem was this weekend.
We had ANOTHER blow out.

The reason he treated me like crap all weekend long..............AGAIN, was because he was worried about SD..............................................AGAIN! She started on Friday with the texts. She knows thats our date night.

SD29 was texting him about how she needs $1500.00 to clear up the mess she is in with her car and blah blah, she's depressed and all alone and doesn't know what to do. (It's only a mess because she lost her license due to too many infractions in such a short period of time) Cops took her plates then she had to go to some class to get her license back (more$)....still doesn't have a job., etc.

She went on with the texts about how her boyfriend left her, that she really needs DH's help, he's all she has, she loves him, blah freakin' blah.

So, then she proceeds to text him that she just wants to go to sleep and never wake up.

DH didn't want to tell me anything cuz I interrupted him the last time he tried to talk to me about her. I did apologize.

She has been using this 'trump card' for the 9 years I have been with DH. Everytime he tries to set boundaries or try tough love.....she'll threaten that she's going to kill herself.
Then he's afraid, what if she does, guilt and so, he'll give her what she wants so she doesn't try to end her life.
This cycle is never going stop. I feel for DH because he really doesn't know what to do because what if she really DOES?

So, I guess, the bottom line is, I have to figure out wether I want to deal with this for the rest of my life or not.

doll faced sm's picture

For 9 years? Erm, no; she's using it to get her way and has no intention of going through with suicide. If she really was going to, she'd have done it by now. If you DH really wants to help her, have him offer to pay for weekly or bi-monthly therapy sessions; she needs them. Asside from that, he just needs to call her bluff, because that's all it is.

horsefly's picture

I agree, dollfacedsm.
The therapy is the next thing I am going to suggest to him. Somehow he would have to pay them directly and not give HER the money.

horsefly's picture

Yes, she's 29 and still hasn't gotten her act together.

My brain can't even comprehend her stupid mentality !!! All she has to do is get a job!! guess what, she'll get paid!! real money!!! Then she can take care of her self!!!! Damn lazy ass!!!

She sent another pathetic text message last night.

"I'm trying to so hard, but everything bad happens to me and I just can't seem to catch a break, I'm all alone, depressed, scared, hungry, and broke. (hello....get a job!) I am at the lowest I have ever been. (heard that one before too, makes me want to puke)

It's been going on for so long, that I don't believe it will ever change.

horsefly's picture

I thought these exact thoughts!!!

I have a good friend who's sister committed suicide and there was absolutely no warning signs whatsoever. Very sad.

I have talked to my friend about it and that is what she said. Most don't walk around threatening they are going to do it! It would be as if they wanted someone to stop them!!! (if you know what I mean)

This just strengthens my anger for this POS! She goes to THAT extreme to get what she wants. I don't even know how I will react to her then next time I see her. grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
She had me so fooled at the beginning of my relationship with DH.

Oh boy, now that I know who she is, the only kind of relationship I could possibly have with her is non-existent.