Really Wishing I had never gotten involved.
So I mentioned before that I have great medical and dental insurance at work. DH is self employed so he is under my policy. BM was paying $600 a month for insurance at her part time job and decided she can't affort is anymore. I offered to become the primary insurance for Skids if she would file an agreement with the court stating that she pays copays and prescriptions, we pay premiums and deductibles, and we split emergencies. After two weeks of back and forth she agrees. One condition of the agreement between us was that we come to this amicably and without judge's involvement since it is my policy, I am not required to provide skids with insurance, and I don't want to be involved in an ongoing drama. I was very clear that if she wanted to play games, I was removing my offer to cover them from the table. I also worded the agreement to state that coverage would be provided by me as long as I chose to make it available and provided contingencies where DH and BM would either split her employer's insurance or find an independent group plan, if I no longer made coverage available. We were going to verify that she filed the agreement and then give her the cards.
We haven't been able to verify that she filed the agreement - the court's website only says that the judgement (from their previous hearing) and a contempt of court was filed. She claims that she attached the signed agreement to the judgement and won't provide us with the contempt of court filing because she has til mid-March (21 days before the hearing) to do so. So today we get paperwork on a case filed with the child support services department from her. I knew that she was probably going to go after some back child support from DH (he had foolishly agreed to 60% of his income, with her promise not to go after him if he came up a little short some months, HA!). The paperwork also included a request for information on medical insurance for an insurance order. We've emailed BM and let her know that I've had enough - either she provides all orders filed with the date stamp so I can confirm she filed the agreement and there is no requests for the judge to make other medical insurance orders or changes to our agreement by tomorrow at five PM, or I cancel the coverage on MOnday.
My concern is that if we provide the child support services department with my insurance info, it looks like DH has coverage available, which he does not have through his employer. Only I do and I can make it available if I want to. I don't want them to have my info and if I choose to make insurance available, it will be at my terms and not under order to DH. What do you think - with this new filing with child support services on the table, should I just cancel and let BM and DH figure it out with the judge? If I cancel, I cannot add the skids back on until next January, so truly insurance would not be available for them. That would get me out of this drama and ensure that I am not liable for any medical bills that BM chooses not to pay. DH would probably have to fork over another $200 to cover the kids somehow (SD17 will be 18 in June anyway so after that its just one kid), but at least I don't have to deal with it. What would you do?