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Pole

kassandrarayne's picture

I'm taking a pole. Which is worse having a SD or having a SS?

mean stepmom's picture

Because men don't analyze and look no further than the surface if the SD is manipulative she can get over on her dad.

leah's picture

SD's generally have more jealosy than SS's when their fathers enter into a relationship, especially if the father has guilty dad syndrome, or has placed his daughter in the significant other role. This creates a situation where the adult relationship is guided by confusion over roles in the home. SD's like to think of themselves as the apple of fathers eye, and in steps someone who is his adult equal and SD has to change her role. Adjustment doesn't usually go so well. MY SD thought of herself as the woman of the house before me and I place that blame on her father for not drawing a specific line between adults and kids roles.

Sita Tara's picture

I was a little confused too.

BUT for the sake of answering the question...

I only have a SD. BUT....I think it would be easier for me if it was a SS because then he would likely have been done with BM's crap all along. Plus BM never wanted a child to begin with, but REALLY didn't want a boy. I'm pretty sure a boy would have bonded more with DH because he's done such a good job trying to bond with my sons. And a boy wouldn't have gone nuts over material fashion/hair/makeup (I hope. DH is very old school and that wouldn't have flown very well!)

"Om Tare Tutare Ture Mama Ayurpunye Jnana Putin Kuru Svaha"
~Sita Tara Mantra

kassandrarayne's picture

Sorry didn't mean to mislead you LOL Ok that show's how brain dead I am lately I can't even spell anymore. POLL POLL POLL

Elizabeth's picture

But I have no real experience. My brother has four girls and I have two. Plus SD15. But I KNOW my husband would treat SD differently if she was a boy. He won't even ask her to mow the lawn or do ANYTHING around the house, and I was doing all of that even though I was a girl.

I heard something funny once: If you tell a boy not to do something he'll either do it anyway or go find something else to do. If you tell a girl not to do something, she'll cry. I know that's been true comparing my BDs with my sister's little boy. Boys are less ruled by their emotions, in my opinion. Plus there's no clash of "who rules the house." I think SD was the woman of the house until I came along in that she decided what they were going to do and when they were going to do it, and my husband went along with it.

Angel's picture

it's even and it depends on the kid. Both genders can be hellions. It is the luck of the draw & God bless us all.

kathleen's picture

My SD is all the problem. She is a mini-BM and believed she needed to choose between her mom and her dad. So she chose mom and made sure her little brother did the same. He would be so much easier if she weren't so powerful in his life. Girls I think tend to be this way, especially if they are much like their Mothers. The trick is teaching the kids that they don't have to choose. But obviously people aren't too good at that other wise, this site wouldn't be so popular.

ColorMeGone2's picture

I have two SDs, one BD, one BS and one SS. What I have learned from having three girls and two boys is that all kids are a pain in the ass. It's true of both sexes and in equal amounts. The problems may be a little different, depending upon the sex of the child, but they are all going to be different, anyway, because they have five distinct personalities. One kid's drama is another kid's no biggie. One kid's fear is another kid's excitement. Some do great in school, some struggle a bit. One girl and one boy are learning disabled, one girl is gifted and one girl and one boy are above average. My boys have gotten just as mouthy as my girls. My girls have been just as destructive as my boys. But I love them all and I miss the skids a lot, the girls and the boy equally. I can't say that having an SD is worse than having an SS or vice versa. I can't even say that having a BK vs. a SK is any better, because let me tell you, my BD5 is bouncing up and down on my last nerve this week! Wink

♥ Georgia ♥

"Good men don't just happen. They have to be created by us women." (from ROSEANNE)

Tara12's picture

Even though my SD15 is a pretty good kid - I would much rather deal with an SS!!!! In the past I have dated a couple of guys that had boys and it was sooo much easier!

frustratedinMA's picture

I have one of each right now. I think sd is worse than ss. She is bossy and turning out to be a chip of the old bm's shoulder. SS is more laid back and non complicated.

I have even said to my dh in the past.. I like it when we just get SS. (he is also wayyyy more relaxed when sd isnt around. She is BOSSY.. did I already say that???)