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Girls vs boys

Jcksjj's picture

We are finding out on Friday if we are having a girl or a boy. So far I've had 2 boys and naturally everyone is assuming I want a girl and telling me how girls are supposedly easier and blah blah. Is that the experience you guys have had? I've seen articles claiming girls do better in school so that part I could see as being true. I really dont care which the baby is but I am curious about anyone else's boy vs girl raising experiences since that's what I keep hearing about.

futurobrillante99's picture

I have 2 boys and a girl. They are equally difficult but at different times. I think girls are harder around 12 to 17. Boys often have more energy and get into more mischief, in my experience.

sunshinex's picture

This. 

My mom had two girls and one boy (me being one of the girls obviously lol) 

My sister and I were absolute terrors as teens. Drugs, EDs, self-harm, all the drama. That's not true for all girls of course, but girls tend to be much, much more emotional, and with that, comes all sorts of crappy behaviour and mean catty attitudes. 

My brother, on the other hand, just got into a lot of trouble and hurt himself all the time doing dumb stuff. He would bike down hills with his eyes closed, fall out of trees, all sorts of typical boy injuries. 

She got along better with him than us because he wasn't mean to her lol 

 

Jcksjj's picture

Honestly that is what makes me nervous to have a girl...preteen and teen girls omg attitude and drama. But then I also think about my guy friends in high school and then dumb things they did and think omg again lol.

sunshinex's picture

I'm happy my bio is a boy and my step is a girl. I will 100% disengage from her when she is a teenager, unless on the off chance, she's one of those teenage girls who appreciate their stepmom for all she's done (LOL does that happen ever?) 

 

Kiwi_koala's picture

I don't have kids, but my mom has me and my two brothers. I didn't give her any issues as a teenager. I didn't drink, do drugs and didn't date boys yet until college. She didn't like my past fiance so there was that but I was and still am easy going. My middle brother was mostly good and my youngest brother was very very difficult. He had attitude issues so I think it depends on the kid. 

Rags's picture

My brother has a daughter and two sons.  He swears that when they are little girls are easier but the hell they represent when they hit their teens and early 20s is so bad that boys over all are far easier.  Though he does freely admit that when they are young boys are far more difficult than girls are when they are young.

24 years as a SM's picture

My parents had 9 kids, 5 boys, then 4 girls. I m the youngest of the bunch. My dad swore up and down that the boys were so much easier than us girls, my parents owned a ranch, so both of them were hard working and expected all of us kids to do work around the ranch. All of us girls were tomboys, when we were young, but when the teenage years rolled around, it was a total nightmare for my parents. Two of my sisters became the most prissy selfish girly girls and it drove my dad nuts, the whining about broken figure nails, wanting new designer clothes, and don't get me started about the damn shoes they wanted.

Dad always said that girls can be so selfish and demanding, but I remember my oldest brother being a self entitled arrogant asshole, because he was the oldest. So I think it's all about perspective of each person.

ndc's picture

My grandmother had 4 of each variety, and she always said it was more dependent on the personality of the individual child than gender.  But she said in general, girls are easier when they're young but more difficult as teens. 

Focused_onourlife's picture

I have 3 boys and 1 girl. My girl 16 is NOW the hardest because she is a girly girl (happened more when she reached HS). She is also more dependable, the second oldest and I could depend on her more to actually WATCH the kids (2 youngest boys 10 and 9) when we go out and actually help out with household needs more then our ODS19 and the BS's 10 and 9 all together. All in all, she requires more financially and emotionally (and make straight A's and some B's and more rewarded because of that) but the boys are the one's we worry more about because they don't think about consequences like the DD. I just can't stand her hormonal attitude and what gets her in trouble the most but when we explain why she's punished she will understand and try harder.

caitlinj's picture

Each is hard for different reasons. SS tends to cause more mischief and is lazier than SD. He also manipulates and lies more than SD does (surprisingly). SD is very emotional and seems to have issues with her temper, listening  and controlling her anger outbursts. She also tends to be the mean girl at school whereas SS is near perfect at school he's very manipulative at home. SD likes tto try new activities and gets very frustrated but sticks it out. SS is a quitter and mocks SD. He is insecure about not being able to accomplish age milestones as well as she has.

Myss.Tique D'Off's picture

I only have a son (13) and he was and is generally very easy to raise. My parents had 3 boys and 2 girls. My Mom says my brother and I were equally difficult for various reasons... I guess it depends on t he personalities involved. My brother and I are both head-strong, strong willed peopled... And strangely, the only two who experienced divorce and  a step-kid situation.

Dealing with skids, my SD was horrible. SS is way better, so IMO, boys are probably easier. No evidence to prove it though Wink

justmakingthebest's picture

I had a boy first and then a girl. I was honestly hoping for another boy, I felt like I had to boy mom thing down! A girl was going to really change things... I must say, I love my son more than words can express, but there is something special about having a daughter. It is a different bond. 

My experience was that as a baby and toddler - boys are hard!!! My daughter was soooo much easier as a little one. Now that we are in the teens/pre-teens- boys are soooo much easier! LOL - I can't complain though. I have good kids Smile The pressure on girls as they get older, with the hair, the makeup the clothes.... Plus my kids put a ton of pressure on themselves with grades. Then throw in sports... and hormones! It is a lot some days!

Iamwoman's picture

I can't stand this argument because it's pointess and it stereotypes entire genders.

Here are several scenarios to help you realize that it's personality and not gender that determines how "easy" a child is:

1. I have a brother and a sister (and obviously I'm a girl). My brother took pleasure in torturing my parents with manipulation, nasty attitude, etc. He was ALWAYS the most difficult one of the three of us.

2. My DH has one brother. DH is a great person and a success. His brother was a nightmare of a child and still struggles in his early thirties to even hold down a job (we are embarrassed to be related to him).

3. I have 25 cousins: family 1 - 2 boys, 2 girls - youngest boy was the easiest. family 2 - 2 girls and 1 boy - oldest girl was the easiest. family 3 - 2 boys - both a handful until late teens. family 4 - 1 boy and 1 girl - girl was the easiest (boy killed himself at age 12). family 5 - 3 girls and 1 boy - oldest girl was the easiest, the boy took to drugs and drained his parent's reiterment account. family 6 - 2 boys - both easy.

4. I have 1 daughter and 2 sons - Here is how I would rank them in order of easy: 1. youngest boy = easiest 2. oldest girl = middle of the road 3. oldest boy = nightmare

5. I have 4 nieces. family 1 - both girls are a nightmare. family 2 - both girls are easy

 

Can we be done with this stupid argument, because it is 100% PERSONALITY

Jcksjj's picture

I agree that it does in the end come down to personality but I also think that there are things that are more true of boys vs girls on average. Of course if you dont have one that falls into the more average thing it doesnt really matter, but I still think it's interesting to see others take on it. It wasnt meant to be a super serious topic. Also I think it depends on the parents personality as well...I personally have more tolerance for rowdiness than drama or snotty attitude. I have a hard time imagining myself as a girl mom at the moment but I'm sure that would change if I actually had one.

Iamwoman's picture

I totally understand that is difficult to see past the stereotypes. Out of our three kids though, I would say that the oldest boy is the snottiest and most dramatic. When I was a child, I was the most rowdy.

I guess if you or your husband subtly discourage a girl from being "rough and rowdy" then she will most likely become snotty and dramatic out of sheer frustration. My own DD, while not rowdy (neither are the boys though - they all love to sit on their rears), is by far the most athletic and the most logical of all three of our kids. I only ranked the youngest boy as the easiest because that is how I feel this year. If you asked last year, I would have ranked DD as the easiest hands down.

I think teenagers in general are a pain the rear, and girls get a bad rap because poor behavior from a girl is all to often not as overlooked as is poor behavior from a boy. If you don't believe this, imagine a girl bopping another girl on the head, and then imagine a boy bopping another boy on the head. You cringed more at the thought of a girl doing it to another girl, didn't you? Most people do, but it doesn't make it ok. I'm sure many people would even attribute more maliciousness to the girl's act of aggression than the boy's - which of course is ludicrous. That's stereotyping.

STaround's picture

The NY Times had a study that showed that families expect girls to spend appreciably more time on chores than boys.  That is wrong.   People expect girls to clean up, babysit etc.  We need to support girls.  The days of boys and men doing field work has ended for most families.   Work in the house has to be shared. 

mro's picture

When ex and I were expecting our third we had already had 2 girls.   I lost count of how many people said, "hoping for a boy, huh?"   Our response , we're hoping for a healthy baby.  It would have been the same if we had had 2 boys and they were assuming we were hoping for a girl.  

Well it was a boy!  In some ways I think a boy was easier but then again I had to keep him on a lot shorter leash lol