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She wants to talk

jojosgma's picture

So my SS Wife who if you have read any of my previous posts is a narcissistic, manipulative, cancer to our family sent me a text a few days ago stating she wants to have a "real" talk with me and how I always say communication is so important and she agrees 100%. Well after about 7 mos of being treated like crap and not being allowed to see my Sgranddaughter who I love to death, I have just completely disengaged. My Husband says he is going to have a talk with his son and let him know exactly how he feels about he and his Wife's behavior, but has yet to do it. Well knowing my SS as I do he will probably not talk to his Dad for a long time after he has this conversation with him as he can't handle any type of criticism at all he is what I would call a "little bitch". So I texted the Wife back that my Husband wants to talk to his son first and we will go from there, and got no response. My question is was I wrong in not talking to her? I don't want to make things worse but I really feel I am better off staying disengaged, they have hurt me too many times, but I miss my SGranddaughter. Sad

jojosgma's picture

I am about 100% sure you are right, she loves the drama! I read a saying "sometimes the most powerful thing you can say is nothing at all" that really stuck with me.

twoviewpoints's picture

If SDIL really had wanted to 'talk' to you, she would have pushed your number and called. Starting off the conversation with 'Hello, MIL, I'd like a chance to apologize for my behavior and discuss where we could perhaps go from here'.

Don't feel bad or guilty you texted back what you did. She was expecting you to jump at the chance to speak to her ill-behaved self and then promptly dump the fault and error of ways on your feet. What she did was summons you and you were suppose to be so grateful you'd jump at the chance. She was testing the waters to see I you were ready to come crawling back to 'life according to SDIL'.

You did fine.

LadyJ's picture

THIS ^^^^^

Totally agree with above post. She wants it to be on her terms- to see you come begging for scraps of affection. Dont give it to her- if she has something to say let her to the legwork, come to you on your territory

jojosgma's picture

Thank you all for your support, it does make me feel better about my decision. That is what manipulative people do make you question your self. She should have offered that invitation 7 mos ago. At this point I can't even stomach being around her and my SS anymore so I really don't see how this relationship could be fixed, all the talking in the world will never make me trust that cow again.