Grandchildren are not weapons!
My husband and I had seven kids between us when we got together 3 of his, 4 of mine, five boys, two girls all of which are adults now ranging from the ages of 18 to 26. I think the blending of the family went pretty well, no major drama until about 5 years ago when the Bio Mom entered the picture. She had no contact with the skids for 10 years, she was on drugs and didn't even bother to send them a card on their bdays nothing, let alone a dime of child support. So when she decided that she was done smoking crack and wanted to be a Mom I really tried to encourage the relationship and even let her stay in my home when the youngest skid graduated from high school. It didn't stay amicable long. I found out through my oldest skids Wife who is a piece of work herself and loves to start drama at every opportunity that she was telling her kids that her dad was abusive to her trying to shift the blame for her absence on him. My husband has never bad mouthed her to his kids and this really upset me. The longer she was in the picture the worse things got. My relationship with the two younger skids is OK I am definitely not as involved in their lives as I used to be but we get along. Now the issue is that my oldest skid and his wife team up against me and my Husband. My Stepsons Wife who I refuse to call my DIL any more used to be tolerable. She would put on her fake smile and at least attempt to act like a normal person (she is a narcissist if there ever was one)She used to include us in our Granddaughter's life and things weren't too bad. I have always known she had mental issues and wasn't a good choice for my stepson to marry but kept that between my husband and I. Well to make a long story short things have gotten to the point that We rarely see our Granddaughter anymore. My stepson got drunk hit on my Bio Sons Wife and refuses to apologize to her. My Step Sons drama loving Wife is the one who told me about it or I would have never known. My son said nothing about it nor did his wife. I was just kind of wondering what was going on because nobody was coming over for Sunday family day and dinner we all used to enjoy pretty much every Sunday since we moved back. So I told them I wanted nothing to do with any of that it was there business. My Son texted his Stepbrother trying to not make a big deal of all this and asked him to play basketball he never even returned his text. It all came to a head when my Stepsons wife decided she was gonna have a surprise bday party for my Stepson on the day him and his Dad were flying back from his grandfather's funeral. I guess she had it in her head that she was gonna have this party and everyone was gonna come and this would all be forgiven. Well my bio Son refused to come to his party stating he had not even talked to him in over a month or apologized to his Wife and they would not have anything to do with them until that was done. Well I went to the party brought food as his Wife asked me to and waited for my Husband and Stepson to arrive from the airport. My Husband was exhausted mentally and physically considering he just came home from his Fathers funeral. I didn't feel it was an appropriate time to party and as soon as the presents were opened and cake done, I woke my husband up who was asleep on the couch and took him home. Well we didn't hear from them for awhile and when I told my Husband to see if we could take the Granddaughter to Disney on Ice my Stepson texted back that he did not want her around me because he didn't want her treated like a step child like he was. WoW I was floored! that really hurt! I am very close to my Granddaughter and we have a very special relationship. My other skid told me he was mad because I had an "attitude" at his party. OMG my Husband just got back from his Father's funeral sorry if I just didn't "turn UP" as the kids say for your party. So we have seen our Granddaughter maybe 3 times in the last 7 mos and they live ten minutes away. My Bio Son and Step son have nothing to do with each other and basically the whole family is torn apart because my Stepson wont man up and apologize, I don't think my bio son is being unreasonable in his request. I am just so done with all of this I really want nothing more to do with them. They use my Granddaughter as a weapon but that doesn't even matter to me anymore, I am done! This is not the first incident of them being aholes I could go on and on but I already have didn't I say I was gonna make a long story short LOL! I love this website and am open to any input.