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What is wrong with our lawyer??

skylarksms's picture
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DH and I had a situation in court that I don't understand. Here is the background:

BM had a fit when we switched medical insurance and refused to give DH his scheduled visitation until she got the new medical information. I am not sure if she thought he was lying about it or what the deal was. Anyway, I had the idea (after researching the legality) of him taping the conversation he had with her regarding picking them up for Easter - which was his upcoming holiday at the time.

Of course, BM started yelling and told him that there was no way he could come and get the kids for his visitation unless she got the medical information. He even offered to bring it when he picked them up and she said that wasn't good enough.

SIDENOTE: we found out later, that she had paperwork that SHE needed to fill out and send in, which she hadn't, and that's why NONE of us had gotten our new information!

Anyway, we took the tape to our lawyer, the same one we've used every time (and every time, we have received what we wanted) and scheduled a court date.

When court came up, BM was called up on the stands and eventually our lawyer asked her why DH was not allowed to have his children for the court ordered visitation for Easter. BM says (without batting a lash) that DH didn't come to pick up the kids and they even waited for him to show up but he didn't. :jawdrop: DH and I got excited to PROVE to the court that she lies a lot!

WHAT I WANT TO KNOW IS: WHY didn't our lawyer bring up the tape then???? He was very happy when we brought it in his office. Wouldn't this have been the time to present it to the judge?!? Do I watch too much crime television or something? I feel like we missed a golden opportunity!

starfish's picture

too much tv.... most taped conversations aren't usable in court if both parties aren't informed of the recording...... bm could just say she never said those things and had no idea how you & dh could manufacture a tape like that.

skylarksms's picture

In our state, it said that tapes are legal if one party knows they are being taped. That the other party doesn't need to know.

Anyway, I am thinking about giving the tape to the Skids after they turn 18. I bet BM told them that DH was coming to pick them up and they waited for him not to show up! Sad

stepmasochist's picture

Same in our state, only one party has to know if a conversation is being recorded. Did you ask the lawyer why he didn't use it?

starfish's picture

i certainly hope not, that's is wrong... but at the same time i wouldn't doubt it... our bm lies thru her teeth, non stop.

mom2five's picture

It may be because of exactly what I said in another thread. I have never seen a family court judge react well to stuff like that. It may be legal to tape a conversation in your state, but it can also make your DH look really bad in court. The lawyer may have thought that the tape would have done more harm than good.

OR....if he didn't disclose that he had the tape to BM's attorney, it wouldn't have been admissible at trial. With very few exceptions, stuff like that has to be disclosed during discovery well before the trial.

OR....he just didn't think it would make a difference.

Those are just a few possibilities.

skylarksms's picture

Well, I guess I shouldn't be mad, because we got everything we asked for anyway.

I just HATE the fact that she can lie to everyone and get away with it!!

mom2five's picture

I did not know that about Canadian law...interesting.

Just looked at our Federal Rules (In the U.S.)

A recording is admissible under the Federal Rules as long as one party is aware:

Voluntary elicitation of the recorded conversation:as long as one participant in the conversation is aware that he is being recorded, the tape fulfills this final requirement. This means that a defendant's Fourth Amendment rights are not violated when the conversation is electronically monitored by a government agent with consent of the government informant in the investigation.*14*

But our state laws vary tremendously on this issue.