Boyfriend and Part-time daughter moving in
My widowed boyfriend is moving in in August, along with his 19-year-old daughter. He lost his wife to suicide when his daughter was five and he's been a single parent for the most part. She'll be a sophomore in college in the fall, 3,000 miles away, but will be with us four months a year for the next three years, and then who knows. . . She'll have a 300 sf finished room and half bathroom in the basement-- (really nice for a basement, we're not relegating her to a dark hole.) They're moving in with me because my house has more space, meanwhile BF will rent out his for a hefty amount. BF will be paying a contribution to the mortgage each month, along with contributing about half the amount for food and utility bills. I would like him to pay more for the months when his daughter is here but I'm not sure what's fair. I'm frankly not looking forward to having her live with us, even part-time, as she has a BIG personality (likes attention), is prone to walking around half-naked (part of attention-getting and unlikely to change but that's another story) and likes to have friends and her boyfriend overnight for sleepovers. She can also be really sweet and vulnerable and I'm trying to focus on that, but I'm still struggling. She has to go somewhere on breaks but I'd rather not subsidize her at my house. If anyone has been through this sort of thing before I'd love to hear from you. BF and I will be having another financial discussion soon and I want to bring this up. Maybe I'd feel differently if I really felt a connection to her but I'm not there yet. Or maybe I'd still want my BF to chip in more no matter what. (I'm guessing the latter.) Beyond not wanting to subsidize her I feel as though I have to have something to make this a sweeter deal. I love my boyfriend and we both want to move forward with this relationship.