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Should be common sense

Momof6WI's picture

My kids bio dad and I agreed that no custody swaps would take place if someone were to become ill, they will stay where they are. Now ss4 and SS3 BM doesn't understand this concept. What so ever. If they get sick, and bring it over here- I'm SOL, I have an immune disease as well as asthma. So I'm pretty sure that's why she's ticked off. It's just common sense! Don't spread it! Even if I wasn't immune compromised!!!Gawd she makes me want to bash my head into the wall at her stupidity. 
 

#rantover 

Comments

Excellence's picture

How did you know she didn't like it. Did she text it? Just block her texts for a while. Shut out the noise. Who cares if she doesn't like it. We do a lot of things BM doesn't like. We just delete her message. 

Momof6WI's picture

This whole thing is just stressful, I am not a homebody so I'm struggling lol. As I'm sure is everyone else. Our "safer at home" order is until 4/24....unless told otherwise. God, a month seems like such a long time. 

Excellence's picture

Agreed. Thankfully DH has chosen not to respond to BM so she stopped messaging us. Her first message was "we need to help each other out. There might be times I will need to drop skids off so I'll need extra support. I also need you to find out about their online learning and share that information with me." We deleted that message and never responded. Hell no we aren't taking the kids for more days than we have to, and she is a 52 year old lady who is more than capable of finding out from her kids school about their remote learning needs. Good lord. She has a live in boyfriend who obviously doesn't do shiet for them. I knew she was going to double down her neediness and controlling behaviors.

Momof6WI's picture

It amazes me that even at 50-something people can still be so helpless. You are THE PARENT, figure it out. I will be damned if I need to rely unnecessarily on my Bio-kids father. Ick. Lol. 

Kes's picture

You would be classed (well certainly here in the UK) as a vulnerable person who needs special shielding from the danger of catching COVID.  Such people here are to stay at home for 12 weeks and not to go out for anything - and preferably to get food deliveries so that they (or their partner) does not go to the supermarket.  There is no question of the SKIDs coming over in the circumstances, if they are sick. 

Momof6WI's picture

Yes, my doctor encouraged me to only be in contact with the people in my home, and since my fiancé's job is essential he's gotta go through the whole decontamination procedure when he gets home. The whole thing sucks.

ChzyBob20's picture

BowelMovement is an irresponsible idiot and a terrible mother. I ceased concerning myself with what she thinks a long time ago. My DH is also apathetic about what BowelMovement thinks or does as long as it doesn't affect his prior spawn or our kids or our home or our marriage.

He tells her NO.

Monkeysee's picture

It doesn’t matter if she understands the concept, what matters is your DH understands it & tells her no swaps himself. I never get involved with visitation arrangements for my skids, but with this I made it very clear we weren’t having the boys because I wasn’t going to risk my child’s health, or theirs. BM could kick, scream & throw whatever hissy fit she wanted, but not a chance on gods green earth was she going to decide on the health & well-being of MY child. I told DH to keep our child safe, or I would. If you haven’t had that conversation with your DH you really need to, this is not the time to be letting incompetent exes call the shots. Your health is more important than her need for control. 

Winterglow's picture

Given your fragile health and knowing that they can be contagious long before they start showing any symptoms, they shouldn't be coming over at all.

thinkthrice's picture

if necessary they can make up the time down the road.  When my bios were ill, I'd postpone visitation until they were over whatever they had.  Then make up the time down the road.  It's just common sense.

Chef would NEVER do this as the Girhippo was only too happy to dump off her feverish, projectile vomiting illness-laden brats.  And Chef was always pining for more time to spoil them.  Lose/lose for me.

Both of us would invariably catch what they had.  The only up side was that when the ferals were ill, it was the ONLY time they were quiet and relatively well behaved.

Again, you have a DH problem if he won't say NO to the BM.

Momof6WI's picture

He told her no. Like I said, I'm just in my safe place complaining. I don't know why everyone jumps to a DH problem, us step parents need a place to complain lol. 

Momof6WI's picture

I don't talk to BM if I don't have to, he told my fiancé she was dropping them off whether he liked it or not lol. He was like oh really? No you are not. She just doesn't have a common sense in her body, and is a disgusting human being.