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SO needs to be evaluated because he is delusional.

Wicked stepmo.'s picture

After a year of lockdowns, I made plans for DS and I to go in some trips together. Prior to COVID the last trips we went on YSD completely ruined with her disruptive, disrespectful tantruming behavior. I still have PTSD from the experience.

I made a promise to DS I would make it up to him, since we all had a horrible time. 

I have never hid my feelings or intentions from SO. So I was completely taken a back when he mentioned bringing YSD!!! 

He must be insane.

I told him flat out that if he plans to do that he will be driving with YSD in a seperate vehicle and renting his own place. I am not having her ruin another vacation I paid for ever again.

If he wants his fatherly guilt to cloud his judgement he can suffer the consequences all on his own. He will not be dragging me down with him 

Comments

tog redux's picture

Good for you. Seems like you two should take trips separately with your kids, and together with no kids.

shamds's picture

For ils that all skids would be at especially sd's

3 visits outings with them and on the 3rd one, sd24 was banging like a ceazy banshee on our bedroom door while our 1 & 2 yr old were sleeping. It was nothibg impo But she made it like it was life or death.

me and hubby were actually having sex and my husband stopped, put on his clothes and opened the door and took sd to his car to get her non important crap!! Never again, never any vacays or them staying with us, no meets ever!!

my husband has played the whole they apologised bullshit and lets start afresh. Nope I don't budge because they have shown repeatedly they have no intentions of being respectful people

missgingersnap2021's picture

I made a rule pre-covid that I would never go away with DH and SD unless one or both of these things were to happen - That we stay in a hotel that has a sperate bedroom for us (with a door that closes) and a pull out couch for SD and that she brings a friend. I'm sorry but the happy little family of 3 is never going to happen. It was fine when we first met and she was only 10 but at almost 17 it's just boring for all of us (of course DH loves to make it sound like Im the only one that doesnt have fun) and I am not comofrtable with all 3 of us sleeping in the same room

With Covid last year I didnt have to worry about him trying to plan something but just the other night his Guilty Dad syndrome kicked in and he started saying how bad he feels for not taking SD anywhere in so long. GREAT! Now I have to wait and see what he tries to plan for this summer. 

Once I became a teenager family trips stops with my mom and dad except for the time thye rented a condo in Myrtle Beach and I brought a friend. Even my happily married parents didnt want to go away with just me at that age.

Tried out's picture

got all bent out of shape last summer because he was planning a trip with SD - you spoke of your marriage vows and how you just had to go along because of something that was kinda convoluted.You didn't want him to go away with just her. From what you say you and DH go away for lots of weekends already so he's not using up the vacation fund by doing this.

Seems to me that's the logical choice here. "Let" them go by themselves. Stay home, go to a spa, go away with a friend, whatever. Then you're not irritated by her very presence and they'll probably have a better time on their own. Win-win, as far as I can see it.

Wicked stepmo.'s picture

That wasn't me. SO has never planned a trip with either of his kids. 

He never went on a vacation or trip with them until he met me and I took them. I made the decision to never do so again because they are rude, disrespectful, beligerent, ungrateful children who are the thief's of joy.

Tried out's picture

I was responding to Gingersnaps post. If you look at the feed, mine is indented under hers, which shows to whom I was responding. Sorry for the confusion!

Harry's picture

You know that SD will make it her job to destroy your and DS fun time.  With her actions.

Let DH pay got his SD to go by getting separate cars separate rooms not together, and separate going places if she acts up. and let DH accept her disrespect to the family on his dime.

You plan fun days with DS, they are only at this age one time, And have fun,  if SD, or when SD starts her show, Then do it by your selfs .  

 

Tried out's picture

Better still, why do they even have to go to the same place? OP made a promise to her son that they'd have a great time to make up for the one SD ruined. No way will she be able to keep that promise if she has to put up with even the possibility that SD will ruin even a single moment.