O/T Dealing with my Ex and his supervised visitation (Need Advise)
So my Ex hasn't seen oue BD in over three months. He has supervised visitation with her anytime he wants as long as he gives me a 24 hour notice at his mother's house. Now BD(7) has been spending the day at his mother's house while I'm at work throughout the entire summer so the Ex can see her whenever he wants when he is in town (he drives long haul trucks).
It's been over three months since her saw her last. He'll ask to see her on x, y, and z days throughout the week and I'll let him know that it's okay via text but he needs to let me know whether or not his mother will be dropping her off at home since I'll still be at work. He never responds. I usually wait a couple of hours and ask him again and let him know that if I don't hear from him by x time on the day or days of the requested visit that I'll just assume she's not and have DH pick her up at 3:45 which is when he would usually get her. Again no response. This is when he just decides that he won't stop by and just blows her off. He would have all day until 3:45 to see her but he'd rather sleep in, hang out with friends, smoke pot, drink, and god knows what else he's doing.
I just don't know what to do. I really don't think that asking him how BD is going to be getting home is being to demanding. I actually need to know that information so that the evenings plans can be adjusted appropriately. I could always just ask his mother but it's really not her responsibility to play the other parent. She's raised her kids and she's always bailing him out of everything which is why he's turned into a giant child that feels like if he has to respond to a simple text with a yes or a no and doesn't want to he'll just throw a temper tantrum and be like, "fine I just won't see BD as a punishment to Unhappy."
I just wish he would make the freaking choice. Either you're in our your out. Figure it out because it's not doing our BD any good when her father blwos her off for over three months when he told her he was going to visit her all because he can't tell me how she's getting home.
Am I being a crazy BM? I don't feel like I'm being demanding.
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Comments
No you are not. Sounds
No you are not. Sounds perfectly reasonable to me.
wowthisishard, we were never
wowthisishard, we were never married thank goodness. It's not that I want him to change. I just want him to freaking let me know how our BD is getting home. And no, he was not like this when we were together. He was a shitty father and a shitty partner but not like this. This started when I first moved in with DH. He was fine when Dh and I started dating but once I moved in he turned into a complete ahole and has been this way ever since.
No worries. We were supposed
No worries. We were supposed to get married. But the only way I could get him to quit drinkning and driving was to give him his engagement ring back. It worked for a couple of years but then he started up again and started doing it with our BD. That's one of the many reasons that I have soul and leagal custody of our BD and he's not allowed to drive her anywhere in a car.