Yeah they seem to always have a super sized toddler temper tantrum when they are told to pull out their own checkbook and to be responsible for parenting their own kids!

"stop reading all that stuff on the internet and trying to act like I'm so bad"

My DH says that whenever I say something that makes a point, that makes him insecure because he knows it's the truth. Let that confirm that he knows you are right but will not admit it.

You said some killer $hit there, friend. I really liked it. Made a point without dragging it out. Well put.

they always flip the switch with the blame! Hate that shit.

I will say on a personal note, that fdh doesn't know, (cause he doesn't get it) that the biggest problem I had with his kid (and part of the reason I still won't be around them today) is that whole "changing the rules behind my back thing"
The rules, or agreements, or whatever the case may be.

I still get frustrated when I think about it. UGH!

" I said, no. It's your son, and I have no power over the situation because you can just make a change to an agreement that we all had. It's not my problem anymore"

Awesome response!

If he's not concerned with his child's schooling, the child can go to PUBLIC school and save your $1000 a month in case he knocks a girl up or gets thrown in jail.

You know it all depends on where you are and what is available.

In one medium sized city I am familiar with (300,000 pop in city alone, metro is prob closer to million) there are two very good private schools and a bunch of other good ones and then you get to the not so great ones. I have friends who have taught in all of them.

But the public schools which overall are horrible do have stellar programs for honors students. My friends who teach at the top private schools have often said that if your child can get in the honors program at the public school it will be better than their schools.

But people who live in small rural areas often have few public or private options for great schools for top students just because they are so small.

I've done a lot of work with a major university. Almost every major urban area has one good school out of all the crappy ones. New Orleans pre Katrina probably had absolutely the WORST schools in the nation. But there was one great school for the gifted. And these kids did very well when they went on to Ivies with kids who had gone to those $50,000/year prep schools.

You cannot make a silk purse out of a sow's ear. Sending an average kid to a great academically challenging school is not going to turn them into Harvard material.

I'm sorry - but when I hear people talk about "who" the other students are I feel like there is prejudice there. I honestly don't think it is racial but it is class oriented prejudice. I think I am sensitive to this because I was the ultrapoor kid.

Interesting discussion! I am a great believer in public education, and where i live public schools are often better than private ones. Most of the private ones around here are Catholic schools.

A gf of mine sends her daughter to a private day school for 18K per year. She is very unhappy with how the administration there handles parents' concerns and is planning on moving to a good school district and going public again next year. I am in a school district that works like a well-oiled machine, everyone i deal with in my boys' schools is courteous, professional and very prompt when returning phone calls, emails, etc. Some of the teachers are phenomenal. My 8th grader's English class has 17 students and the best teacher i have EVER seen teach anywhere (I am in education). His students routinely get the highest scores in the state on state-wide tests. The man needs to go teach at a teacher-training college. I wish i could clone him.

Another benefit of a public school in the town i used to live in, where my kids attended the same elementary school K thru 6th grade, was its unbelievable diversity. Lots of diplomats working for the UN lived in the area, plus lots of immigrants. It was a middle class kind of town, nothing elitist. My sons had friends born from Peru to Japan and in every country in-between. Saudi Arabia, Nepal, Turkey, Korea, Egypt, Serbia, South Africa. At the time the pirates were seizing ships near the Horn of Africa, in the Gulf of Aden i used to think my son could grow up and work for the UN Green Berets - he had friends both in Somalia and in Yemen, on both sides of the Gulf of Aden, which might be valuable.

But it wasn't just the student body that was attractive. The school was awarded the Blue Ribbon for academic excellence when my younger son was in 5th grade. It had a terrific principal and very experienced teachers.

So this is my shout-out to public schools.

I have always thought it is a crying shame that every US President who had a school-aged child always sent them to a private school in Washington. I believe it sends the wrong message.