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BM’s SK’s BM

Sparkl3s's picture

My personal approach to a relationship with BM is none. Mr.Sparkle handles EVERYTHING that has to do with the skids and interaction with BM. I only ask that he discuss dates before committing to pickups. 

I occasionally creep on BM's social media to make sure she isn't plotting a mid country move (again). BM has a BM problem. I know I shouldn't  creep but I secretly get a kick out of seeing that her BM makes her miserable. 

Is BM's SK BM a HCBM (Susan)or is BM (Debbie) unreasonable and upset she isn't being given a "bonus mom" shrine. 
 

BM's SK's BM= Susan

BM= Debbie 

Background: Debbie did have an affair with Susan's husband. All 3 of them worked at the same company.  Debbie did get upgraded from mistress to wife, so I can understand the animosity towards Debbie. I've never gave Debbie a platform to speak with me but I'm sure if I tried to be more active in the skids life she would cry I was trying to replace her as their mom. It's just fun watching from the side lines. Susan is apparently not keeping her opionion about Debbie to herself.

 I just can't speak to Mr.Sparkle about this bc he doesn't care and I should be minding my own business. 
 

Edited*** BM SK's BM for clarity... 

Comments

JRI's picture

Don't you just love it!

Sparkl3s's picture

More than I should for sure! Mr. Sparkle hasn't told the skids of their mom's man stealing ways. The kids have expressed to him how upset BM is that Susan treats her soooo bad. I had to leave the room almost choked on my water. 

Harry's picture

To be Born Again Christian.   Looking for help with there sins.  Then again what the big deal with an affair between friends.  Good sex out weighs screwing up there kids.   Then they can wonder WHY there kids are the way they are.  Going from friends too brother and sister, 

Sparkl3s's picture

I believe their are people that benefit from it/a religion. BM hasn't changed, she just tucks it in. It peaks out and she burns bridges. She behaves very unchristianly when situations don't suit her agenda. 

Rumplestiltskin's picture

BM/BM (BM squared?) and the drama will either make her realize some of the crap she does is hurtful and change to be easier to deal with, or she may just up the drama altogether. Dealing with my SO's HCBM2 has made me realize a few ways i may be making life more difficult for my ex and his GF. For instance, i try not to pop over anymore if my daughter forgets something, whereas in the past i would either drive her over to pick things up or drive things over to her if she called. I had a talk with her about making sure to remember things and she always has to ask her dad if it's ok before i bring her to get something. I realized his GF probably doesn't want to see my a$$ unannounced, even if i'm just in the driveway.  

Sparkl3s's picture

Honestly her post are very woe is meish. Mostly memes of how good moms let dads be dads and don't limit access (okay BM spends her life scheduling shit with her family on my husband's limited time with them).
 

I just snort to myself with the lack of introspect for the whole situation. If we have the skids a whole week or two she calls every day. If they don't pick up their cells. Her husband texts the kids asking them to call their mother back. If that doesn't work she calls/texts my husband to complain. I've seen the skids teens, purposely leave their cells at home when we go out to do stuff. I think she annoys them to instead of saying I didn't want to pick up they go with "I forgot my cell". It's just like everyone knows she is cuckoo including Mr. Sparkle and they all choose the path of least resistance. 
 

she has gps on their cells so she knows where they are and they know which is why a teen chooses to live without ticktok or whatever social media they do now 

Thumper's picture

OMG what a mess

Your bm had an affair with her step dad? ????

 

Sparkl3s's picture

No she was the mistress and reason her current husband's ex wife divorced him. It's just hard to explain sorry. 

hereiam's picture

The way you are wording it is confusing.

Susan is not Debbie's BM, as in her mother, she is the BM of Debbie's stepkids, correct? Her husband's ex-wife.

To me, BM's BM would be BM's mother, so I totally thought Debbie had an affair with her stepdad, as well!

Sparkl3s's picture

I confused myself writing it.... it's hard to keep it anonymous and rename everyone and keep track of who everyone is for sure. Share enough so it makes sense but not too much. 

 

Dogmom1321's picture

Totally guilty of snooping too. I just find it comical. BM swore up and down "I'm done with men." After her last breakup. In less than a month, she started dating a guy 25 yo, 10 years younger than her. Turns out she has known this boy toy for YEARS. They used to work together! 
 

BM would PUBLICLY shame her ex BF for "dating a mutual friend she has know " when she was off doing the exact same thing! I think the ex BF, unfriended or blocked, or something, which is why BM makes her posts public for him to potentially see. Lol grab the popcorn when it comes to social media!

Sparkl3s's picture

I predicted her last move due to her post. I just don't like her blindsiding my husband bc I do have handle his man moods. Luckily, she has a least a decade left of being a bonus mom and her step kids haven't even hit the stinky teen phase yet. 

lieutenant_dad's picture

FYI, you could change "BM's BM" to "BM's SK's BM" for clarity. I read it as BM's mom, not the BM in BM's life.

Back on track: Susan could be a HCBM, but I can't say I'd totally blame her for it. Susan not only had her husband cheat and leave her for his mistress, but the mistress was also a coworker. Susan's professional and personal life got turned upside down, which leaves very little place left where Susan isn't being faced with the reminder that her XH cheated on her. Really, bonus points to Susan for (seemingly) only calling out Debbie via social media.

Though, it sounds like Debbie and Eternal Teenager (BM in my life) could be sisters. I also check social media to see when things are about to hit the fan, and ET also posts those "real parents do this" or "strong women don't need no man" memes. My personal favorite was the one she posted about respecting veterans and it took all I had not to reply "yeah, real respectful cheating on your DH while he was in the service, and then using his service against him during the divorce and custody trial".

But, one of my favorite ET stories is when she was dating a married man she worked with and they had a "falling out". Apparently, he drove by her apartment and didn't come in to the apartment (but she knew he drive by...?). So, in retaliation, she drove by his house real slow when he and his wife were outside and just waved at them as payback.

BTW, I didn't ask for this story. No, she proudly told it to DH and I one night when she dropped off the SSs. Why, I have no idea. But she was very impressed with herself for "giving it to him".

Did I mention that ET was in her mid-30s and this gentleman was in his 50s (I assume, based on the picture of him she shoved in my face) when this happened?

Sparkl3s's picture

That's exactly what I was looking for "BM's SK's BM"! Thank you I updated the post for clarity. I snorted bc the memes you referenced have also been shared and I cackle when I see them. My favorite is "a REAL woman can do it on her own but a REAL MAN won't let her"... 

It is just so funny to me bc I found BM's love letters to then Susan's husband "I can treat you better than your wife blah blah blah..." -____- . When my husband initially told me how his past marriage went down I didn't believe him it's too soap opera plot book to believe. I had friends that worked there and they confirmed and added to everything I had been told. I probably know more then my husband about Debbie's affairs.